


A Mother's Love

by Jade_Tatsu



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Action, Adventure, Alternate History, Alternate Universe, Drama, Family, Gen, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-01
Updated: 2013-08-25
Packaged: 2017-12-10 02:35:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 65,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/780781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jade_Tatsu/pseuds/Jade_Tatsu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The love of one Mother drove Sephiroth to almost destroy the Planet. Knowing the future, how far would another Mother go to protect her child? </p><p>For one life, her son's life, one mother will change everything. Usually one life is sacrificed to save the many, this time it's the many who will become the sacrifice.  But will even that be enough to change the future?</p><p>Find out as Cloud's Mother turns the world everyone knew upside down because nothing is going to stop her from saving her little boy.</p><p>Original Characters are those who existed - Nibelheim's villagers, Wutai Ninja's, Random Shinra personnal, etc, etc.</p><p>Slow building Cloud/Sephiroth so the current 'Gen' tag is completely and utterly accurate and will be changed in due course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu  
 **Beta Reader:** Furious Winter

* * *

Like most stories of this Planet, this one begins in the Lifestream. But this story begins in X years. You see, there was an argument going on.

The Planet was dying. Oh, it wasn't going to implode overnight, but there was going to be a long slow gradual decline. Winter would slowly turn colder and longer until it was the only season and by then permafrost would be everywhere and any surviving surface life would die. Something might survive in the oceans but those bodies of water would slowly freeze, with that freeze going deeper and deeper until everything was solid, though mammalian life would have been gone long before that.

And that's how this story begins. Mammalian life has one advantage over other forms of life, it has humans. Sure, we are a destructive, brutal, callous species but we have two advantages: we can think and we can change. We recognise the consequences of actions both of the individual and the community. We see the grand picture, the entire Planet in one eyes and because of that we can recognise problems before they become too great to fix them.

Of course, this time the problem was already too big. It didn't matter what those living did, they couldn't change the fate that was to come. They might have been able to postpone it for a while; a year, a decade at the most, but it was coming. Most of them wouldn't live to see the end, the cold or lack of food would carry them off long before that, but one would. Cloud Strife. He'd see the death of everything and that distressed the Planet and distressed members of the Lifestream more than they could say.

That's what the argument was about. Those in the Lifestream were trying to decide what they could do to stop it. They were arguing over who would be the best person to stop it. It was Jenova, the alien infection that had been incubating in our Planet for a very long time, one that had been cultured by Shinra Electric Company. Some of them had good intensions. Professor Gast, for example, wanted to use it to make humans stronger, to cure some of our more common diseases. But others, Hojo and Hollander, in tampering with life, in making Soldiers, Sephiroth, Angeal, Genesis and Deep Ground, had opened the way for the infection to spread, to breed and to become the infestation that killed the Lifestream. The Planet itself would survive, but it would just be a hunk of rock floating in space and the Planet knew it was meant to be more than that. It knew it needed the Lifestream.

So what could be done to stop this? That was easy. The Planet would send someone back in time. They would change the past, stopping the infection before it became the infestation.

The question was who. The primary requirement was that they had to be dead. The Lifestream is a tricky thing, it contains the souls and memories of the dead, but it also protects the living. The Planet wasn't actually going to physically send someone back in time, it was only going to send their mind, their memories, including memories of what they had learned in the Lifestream. That's why they had to be dead. If they were currently alive the Planet could not take them and their thread of life, their stream within the Lifestream that was not yet merged fully with the Planet could not be changed in such a large way until they died. The secondary requirements were that they would have both the ability and the desire to make big enough changes to alter fate. Those requirements aren't as easy to find as you might think. Which of the myriad people who had perished should go back? Which of them would make changes and which of them could make changes? Not just little changes, but big changes. Who had the courage to change everything? And that's where our story begins…

* * *

"All right," a drained voice said. "Who have we ruled out?"

"The list might be shorter if we just run through who's left."

"I can't go," a well-built man with black hair and long tapered sideburns said as he solidified slightly in the green that was the Lifestream. Others appeared around him. "I wouldn't be able to make enough substantial changes."

"That rules me out as well," another black haired main appeared, one who looked eerily like the first but whose hair was longer and spikier. "I'm too straight forward, and I'd probably just come across as being more insane than I am."

There were some amused snorts from the souls that were solidifying their presence in the Lifestream.

"I can't either," the voice was soft and feminine and the green took on the slightest trace of pink as Aerith appeared, becoming more solid than the others. "I was too trapped in life and by the time Cloud came to me, it was mostly already too late."

"I don't think I'd change." The voice was deep and for many in the Lifestream it was a shock to see Sephiroth himself materialise, hale and whole, his long hair floating gently in the currents of the Lifestream. "I'd want to change, but without proof I wouldn't be likely to. And that proof would come too late."

"Genesis can't," Angeal said. "He's still alive." "None of Avalanche could do it either," Aerith said sadly. "They are all too young."

"So we need someone older," Sephiroth seized on that point. "Veld?" he suggested with a tentativeness that would never have been seen in life. He was used to life and death discussions, he was accustomed to ordering troops to potentially die. Dealing with the Planet's life was something else entirely, something he could not shrug off as insignificant or for the greater good, especially with the madness that was Jenova burned away from him.

"He's a Turk," Angeal considered.

"I don't think so," Zack said finally. "Too loyal to Shinra, and once he found out about Elfie, it was probably too late."

"What about Elfie, then?"

"No," it was Aerith who made the call. "Too much history there for her to turn aside from the path she was on."

"Surely not if she knew the truth?"

"She's still go about making changes in the same way. And we know Avalanche couldn't do it."

"What about your father, Aerith?"

"Professor Gast?" There was a long moment of consideration before Angeal spoke.

"No, I don't believe so," the older man said. "Even if he decided to abort the J.E.N.O.V.A. program, Shinra would just bring in someone else. Once they found the alien, then we were stuck."

"Can we stop them finding her?"

"Only for a few years."

"What about Ifalna?"

"No," Aerith said with a sigh. "Once it became known Mother was an Ancient she was too trapped in life. Hojo wouldn't have let her go."

"Lazard?" Zack was just listing names now. "Not enough influence," Sephiroth disregarded the name.

"Hollander?" Angeal joined his puppy in the name listing.

"No… Too much like Hojo… just not quite as successful."

"Lucretia?"

"Same problem as Genesis, still alive."

"Cloud?" it was Sephiroth who nominated the blond.

"What? He's still alive."

"He doesn't have to be," the white haired man defended the suggestion. "And he would have the desire to make the changes."

Zack spluttered at the thought of asking his friend to die in order to save the planet. Sure, Cloud was going to die anyway but… it… just didn't seem right. Angeal frowned as he considered the notion. He vaguely remembered the blond from life but most of his knowledge came from watching events after his death. "I don't… I don't think so," he said finally, slowly, as he thought about it. It wasn't asking Cloud to die that made him reject the nomination, it was something else. "I don't deny he'd have the will to make changes, but in early life he was too timid. It wasn't until after Hojo got hold of him that he was forced to show his strength. And on top of that, even if he decided to make alterations, and with the knowledge he'd gain he would make changes, I think he'd be too young and the path would follow too similarly to what we know. Let's look at this logically," Angeal continued. "If we sent Cloud back he'd know what was to come, but what would he do?"

"He wouldn't fail the Soldier exam," Zack said, defending his friend. "So we get another Soldier. And even if he uses his future knowledge to be hailed as another prodigy, another Sephiroth, what does that really mean?"

"It means Hojo gets his hands on him faster," Sephiroth supplied the answer as Zack shuddered. "All right," He agreed with his friend. "Not Cloud."

"So who does that leave us with?" Aerith asked again.

"What about Rufus?"

"I think he'd use the knowledge to bump his father off faster but he wouldn't change. At least he wouldn't change the stuff we need changed."

"Reeve?"

"Too young, and not enough influence."

"Scarlet, Heidegger, Palmer?"

Those three suggestions were met with derisive snorts and abandoned.

"Shinra Senior?"

The name wasn't immediately rejected but after a few moments Angeal shook his head. "No. Even if we went back to when he was really young, he'd have to be seen to be doing the right thing, which means that that most of what we want to prevent would already be in motion before he would act."

"Weiss? Nero?"

"No, anyone in Deep Ground would be too young or too late to make changes."

"Argh this is impossible!" Zack growled. "We need someone with a vested interest in the outcome but who is also old enough and capable of making changes," he summarised the situation.

"Not just changes," Angeal objected, "radical changes. Most of us would make changes, but we'd want to keep the good parts of our lives… we'd try to change what we had rather than reach out to make something different."

"And if things remain that close to what happened, the outcome will be the same," Sephiroth said with certainty.

"This should be easier! There are so many people with a vested interest!"

Four sets of eyes closed as they thought about the problem, thus missing when the decision was made for them. The Planet didn't though. They weren't the only ones thinking about the past and how to change it. Others in the Lifestream were and the Planet sensed the exact moment the soul nominated as one who was willing to go back and to make changes; a soul that would actually be in a position to make changes.

The Planet and the Lifestream wasted no time and acted in unison, reaching within themselves to grab the person, gathering up all their threads of memory, and all the memories they had gained since dying before thrusting them deep into the core of green. The Lifestream spun and the Planet hummed and time itself stood still, just for an instant, and then, they were gone and all could only pray that fate would be kind.

"What was that?" "Oh no," Aerith said, her voice sprinkled with worry. "The Planet has made a choice."

"What? Who?"

"I don't know." Green eyes turned towards Zack and he could see that his beloved was confused. The Planet usually consulted her but it hadn't this time. Who could it have sent back?

Slowly Aerith closed her eyes. Usually in the Lifestream the Planet's voice spoke to her constantly but where only a few moments ago it had been focused on their conversation it was now concentrating on something else entirely and she knew, just _knew_ the Planet was intent on sending back the thread of Lifestream of the one it had chosen. She wouldn't interrupt, though she did want to know who.

"It will be all right," Aerith recognised her Mother's voice coming from the green. They all heard Ifalna.

"How?" Angeal questioned.

"The one who has gone back has everything needed to change the future."

"But who is it?" Zack asked, while Sephiroth raised one eyebrow in that way that he did that spoke volumes.

"You all overlook the obvious," Ifalna chided them, though she did not materialise. "You are not parents, so you do not know the lengths a parent will go to save their child." "So someone's parent got sent back?"

"Not just anyone's parent. Cloud's Mother."

"But…" Zack wasn't entirely sure what he objected to. Cloud hadn't mentioned his Mother much except to mourn her when she was killed and he didn't really know what type of relationship Cloud had with her. Good, he supposed, but Zack didn't honestly know. He had to admit, from the woman he remembered seeing briefly and the few memories of Cloud's that were within him, she was someone made of iron. She would not accept defeat and after having watched the pain her son went through in life, she would have every reason to want to change that life for him.

"I hope she understands the cost," Aerith said gently.

"Cost?" Sephiroth questioned.

"The Planet was willing to do this, but there is always a price. Whoever went back cannot live longer than they lived this time. While they will possess only one thread of Lifestream as their future and past selves merge, that thread will know when it dies, it remembers it, so they will die at the same time. They might gain a day or so but nothing more. And…" Aerith trailed off as the Lifestream began to swirl around them.

"And?" All three of the males questioned, ignoring the way the Lifestream began to churn. It was odd, but it was not painful, just motion, though more motion than the Lifestream usually made.

"And the Planet wants its Champion. It won't be denied."

Zack gasped. "You mean Cloud's gotta go through Hojo's torture again?" He shouted.

"No," Ifalna's voice was firm. "Cloud is the Planet's Champion but he is tainted by Jenova. If we are getting a second chance, the Planet wants its true Champion."

"What does that mean?" Angeal asked.

Aerith turned her green eyes towards the solidly built man. "It means the Planet itself will enhance Cloud."

"How?"

"I don't know," Ifalna replied to Sephiroth's question. "It is not something we Ancients remember," she added. There was a sense that she was examining the silver haired man carefully. "She will do whatever is necessary to save Cloud."

"Will that be sufficient to destroy Jenova early enough?" Angeal pressed the question.

Aerith's mother was silent for a few moments and the spinning of the Lifestream visibly intensified. "Maybe," came the reluctant reply. "Not even we could think of someone with enough power or influence to ensure Jenova was destroyed who would actually do it. This action will give the Planet its Champion, but it may not save you, Sephiroth."

The Silver General seemed to take a deep breath, a gesture that was truly one for the living but gave comfort to those who were dead with its familiarity. He understood what Ifalna was not saying. Cloud's mother, one of the many he had murdered, had gone back to save her son. His survival, his sanity did not even enter into her thoughts and it was likely if she had the opportunity, Cloud's Mother would cut his throat herself. "I understand," he said when he sensed that Ifalna wanted an answer.

"No, I don't think you do," Ifalna murmured and in life Sephiroth knew the words would have filled him with rage. In the Lifestream, without Jenova's influence he merely acknowledged their truth. He understood only a part of it. He could grasp at the implications of the actions but he could not yet see everything. He would understand it all but only once the events had transpired.

"So what happens now?" Zack asked, looking around at the furiously spinning Lifestream. They'd sent someone back, but what happened to them?

Sephiroth's lips quirked. This was one thing he did understand. There were two schools of thought on what would happen now and no one knew which was the right one. Either they would alter, becoming the new timeline or nothing would happen here because the new timeline would diverge, becoming its own reality split from theirs. "Now, we wait," Sephiroth said. "We wait?" Zack was incredulous and with nervous tension he began doing squats.

Angeal smiled at him and moved to place one hand on his shoulder. "We wait," he confirmed the General's assessment, "And we slowly merge into the new reality that Mrs. Strife will create. There is nothing else we can do."

"Oh," Zack blinked at that and Aerith laughed at the adorably confused expression. He was so cute at times and now that the path was set, not by their hands but by the Planet's choice, she felt she could relax again because both Sephiroth and Angeal were correct. Now all they could do was wait.

* * *

"Raisa!"

The voice was frantic but not yet on the cusp of panic, the tone concerned without carrying an edge of despair. The blond woman in the bed felt herself respond to the call, eyelids fluttering, leading to another cry. "Raisa!" Relief flooded the voice? as blue eyes opened, blinking in the sudden light. "Thank Odin!"

There was a slight shift in the air at the praise but for once it was overlooked as the woman struggled to sit up. She was blinking owlishly as she looked around, taking in the simple surroundings and the virtual crowd of people. The room was medium sized but in between the people she could see a place for a kitchen, a simple table and another bed. The room may have been moderately sized but it was all the room this abode had and suddenly she was filled with a sense of comfort and belonging that made her feel warm despite the relative chill in the air.

"Raisa, do you remember what happened?"

The question triggered something deep inside her and a confused welter of images danced before her eyes. There was so much information, so many memories that she was going to need more time to process them so she went with the simplest things. "I felt dizzy… and then everything went black." _And then my head was no longer my own,_ she longed to add but held back the observation. The extra memories of things that made no sense, things which hadn't happened yet – Cloud was just a babe in arms, how did she remember him crying over his first lost tooth? – were confusing but something was crooning comfortingly to her, telling her that everything would be okay. It would just take time… And for the joy of the memory of Cloud's first word, she could give that voice and these memories a little time.

"You have low iron levels, Mrs. Strife," she heard the gravelly voice of Jax the old brewery Master who doubled as the town's healer. "And that caused you to faint." There was no question in his voice but she could hear the accusation… about what she didn't know. Well, maybe she did. Her dislike of wolf meat was well established. She resisted the urge to snort. Her husband Damian came from Nibelheim and thought nothing odd about the lack of services. She came from Junon and it had been a struggle to adjust, but Cloud made it worth it. And now she had so many memories of Cloud.

"I'll be careful," she said, wondering what would be appropriate to say in this situation and if they would accept it. She didn't want to deal with them now.

"Of course you will!" Damian was a bright flame beside her and she could sense Cloud in his arms. "I'll make sure she is," he promised old Jax. He knew his wife very well and could see the slight frown on her features that bespoke her desire to have what she would no doubt deem 'half the village' out of their house. Nibelheim was a small village in a harsh environment. The people lived together, they lived with each other and going in and out of other's houses was almost second nature to them. No one thought anything of it because they all did it themselves. It was how they survived. Old Agnor needed help, so someone went and gave him that help. It didn't matter, but it did grate upon the sense of propriety his wife still carried from growing up in Kalm. It was such a small thing, but it reminded him of why he loved her.

"Jax, will she be okay?" Damian asked, already rising to begin to shoo the rest of the worried villagers out. From the gifts littering the table, he wasn't going to have to cook for about the next five days.

"She'll be fine, but make sure she gets that iron. She'll probably want to sleep a bit more."

Damian and the rest of the villagers nodded. The rest then took that as their cue to leave and the single roomed house was suddenly quiet and empty.

"Oh Raisa," Damian sighed, as he moved back to sit beside his wife, placing Cloud down on her belly. The little tyke was sleeping and he knew his Mother would be comforted by his familiar weight nearby. "What am I going to do with you?" He questioned affectionately, realising that she had fallen asleep again.

Raisa dreamed, but her dreams were not her own. She saw things, odd things, things that made no sense, but other things touched her so profoundly she wanted to hold the memory close forever. Something made her hold back. She didn't know what it was but he just made her watch. First there were memories of Cloud. So many memories of her baby boy- but he wasn't a baby any more. He was a child, a teenager, a young man and then nothing more. Why wasn't there anything more?

There was no answer as the visions changed and this time Raisa felt herself cringe. There was so much blood, so much fighting! It never ended. Disease and sickness and so much death. She felt bile rising in her throat as she watched. People screamed and fought but that wasn't the worst. The worst was seeing the smaller children looking up at her with their dull eyes and she could hear them asking her to make it stop.

She resolutely turned her head away but the visions would not stop. This time she could see things, huge powerful things that sang with the Planet's energy. They seemed to be fighting something that was glowing and blue and one by one they fell. Raisa could hear the Planet scream as each one disappeared and then she saw a flash of gold and silver and unconsciously moved towards it.

Cloud.

Her Cloud. He was a young man and his blue eyes glowed but she would recognise him anywhere. He was fighting. His sword was impossibly large and she did not know how he was lifting it. Her boy was slight, but he showed no fear and swung the enormous weapon around without hesitation, flicking it almost as if it was much smaller in the battle against a large man with long silver hair. That man's eyes glowed green, but it was not the green of the Planet, it was something else. She didn't know and she watched as he died. Somehow her son was not happy. He seemed resigned. He seemed tired but he took the time to arrange the other man's body so that he appeared peaceful in death. And then he walked away.

Raisa shook her head but the gesture did nothing and another vision came to her. Her son again. Her beautiful son, once more fighting that silver haired man. How…? He had died… But there he was again. His long black leather jacket fluttering around him like an ebony set of wings. She could hear the flap of the leather, smell the soap that had been used to treat it so that it was supple and soft against his skin. She could see the way he fought, his long katana dancing around him as he moved with infinite grace. Cloud looked almost coarse against him but Raisa didn't care. He was her son and he was beautiful though he still looked tired and perhaps even more resigned. And once again he won, striking down the other man without even uttering a word.

She wondered at that. There was no question in her mind that their battle had been fierce; they had been trying to kill each other but why would her son say nothing? Why was her son fighting that man again? The two visions clashed with each other and she could see both battles again, together. There were some slight differences but they were undoubtedly the same. Both times it was her son and both times it was a man with long silver hair.

Yet they could not fight to the death twice.

There was no chance to think because the visions continued. She saw other things this time. People, their faces flashed before her eyes so quickly that she didn't think she could remember them all. But she could tell, just by seeing them that they were all outstanding individuals; skilled, powerful, not necessarily _good_ but they meant the best. A black man with a gun for an arm, a woman who looked like Tifa, the Mayors daughter and another woman with the gentlest green eyes Raisa had ever seen, though she did not miss the hint of steel that was in the way the woman carried herself. An older man, cigarette in his mouth but with a kind smile; another man, pale, so pale that he might be considered unhealthy, with jet black hair and soft glowing red eyes. He seemed sad but determined. A child… no, a young girl, from Wutai and then a black cat… It made no sense but the cat was smiling and then another cat, bigger, stronger, with deep red fur. A man with wild white hair, and a masked man with black hair, three boys with silver hair, all of different lengths. A man with shockingly red hair and a bald man, both in suits. A man with slicked back black hair and round glasses that did nothing to hide his cold gaze. Someone from Wutai, and a scarred bearded man who had the weight of the world on his shoulders, a blond woman, and a red haired woman, then another young man with brown hair and glasses who's eyes were calculating and another man with a gentle look and a bandana. Three more men, one with black spikey hair and soft brown eyes, one with short black hair and considerate eyes and another with red hair and gold eyes. The faces continued and Raisa focused. She didn't know them but she knew if she were to wake and they were standing before her, she'd know who they were; she'd know what their names were.

"These are the people that shape the future," a soft voice spoke and Raisa almost didn't hear, she was so absorbed by looking at the almost never ending parade of people before her eyes. "Along with Cloud and Sephiroth."

It was odd. She didn't know who Sephiroth was but at the same time she did. She knew Sephiroth was the man she had watched the adult Cloud fight twice and yet things between them were not yet finished. Raisa knew that.

"All of them?"

"All of them."

"So why?"

"Because I don't want that future."

Raisa gasped and turned and almost collapsed as she looked straight into her own eyes.

"Yes, I am exactly who you think I am," the other woman, who looked slightly older than her spoke.

"What? How?"

The copy of herself smiled, though the expression was sad. "What you are seeing is the future. The future I want to avoid, that I want to change. Look at our son."

Raisa looked back towards the images, this time focusing on her Cloud. There were precious few times when he was happy but he was always at the centre of the fighting. Wherever it was the fiercest, he was there. He was injured often, sometimes horribly but he always healed.

"Brace yourself," came the instruction and Raisa wondered what could be about to happen. Her son was fighting, always fighting but then the vision shifted and she realised that while the fighting was bad, while seeing Cloud's blood spilt out upon the earth was something that sickened her, there were things that were worse.

He was screaming and she could see the pain etched in every line of her baby boy's body. Blue eyes were impossibly wide, straining like every other part of him to escape but the bonds that held him down on a cold steel table held fast and all he did was strain his muscles and ligaments. He didn't stop screaming as blood poured around him. There were scientists surrounding him, all in clean white lab coats, but they didn't do anything. They merely tsk'd that the incisions they were making were not straight. Cloud struggled again but the conclusion was forgone and Raisa watched as her son sagged, the fight diminishing as the pain became too much. The soft keen in the back of his throat was worse than the screams.

It went on and on and with every image Raisa knew she was seeing another day, another experiment. It never seemed to end and she watched as Cloud slowly sank away. She didn't know how she knew but she could tell he was hiding. Deep in his mind he was hiding and her heart cried. Her son… her beautiful baby… Why?

"That made our son strong enough to fight, but it killed him. A little bit inside, each day, it killed him. I don't care about the world," the other Raisa said, her voice firm, "that is the part of the future I most want to change."

"How?" There had been so many battles in the visions that she didn't understand the timing of them. She could feel some of them, she knew most of them were in the future, but she didn't know their order and she didn't see how they could possibly act to stop it.

"We cannot stop all of the fighting. Humans are violent creatures, we fight each other far too easily but I don't care about that. And I doubt we can keep Cloud out of the fighting forever, but we can stop him being hurt. We can change it so that victory is possible."

"Victory?" That seemed an odd word to use. Each of the battles had been against something new, something dangerous. If it was something new each time, wasn't each victory fought for itself?

"Look again. Look deeper." The instruction was subtle and carried with it a different set of visions.

Raisa cried out as she had no choice. The thing that was all glowing and blue had returned, but this time it was not a vague impression. This time she could see it clearly and she screamed. It was female, maybe… though calling it female clashed with every instinct Raisa possessed. Its skin was blue and its hair was wild and colourless. Claws tipped each finger and bat like wings spread from its back. Scales covered parts of it and extra appendages, tentacles seemed to wave randomly around it. It was not human. It was not anything Raisa recognised but it sat behind everything. Before her eyes the wars began again, the sickness and disease spread over the planet and this time she saw it from a different angle. It was all the same, the battles, the fighting, the sickness, but it all came from the same source: that glowing blue thing.

And she saw her son, her Cloud fighting again, fighting that silver haired man with the same distant, pained expression. But this time she could see that another was with her son's enemy, another was pushing the silver haired man to fight. That blue thing whispered to him, screamed at him, controlled him. Was that why her son was so pained? Did he know that his enemy was controlled? Did he know that the man did not really want to fight?

Raisa shook her head. It didn't matter. Her son was again in pain and another battle was shown to her. The silver haired man was there, holding the head of the blue thing and laughing the laugh of one who was insane. She cried out as her son was stabbed, the long thin blade driving completely through him but she could not help but feel a stirring of pride, of admiration for the sheer stubbornness of her Cloud as he continued to fight far past the boundaries of others and he won, flinging the silver haired man into the glowing pit in the reactor before he collapsed. Her Cloud, her son! He was so strong!

But the glowing blue thing always remained and watched. And _hated._

"What is it?"

"It is Jenova."

"What is Jenova?"

"I don't know whether she was an Ancient infected with a virus or if she was the virus herself. Jenova is the calamity that fell from the sky in ancient times."

Raisa frowned. She'd heard something about that… somewhere… In a story a long time ago.

"It's an old tale and we think of it as nothing but fantasy, something to please the children with before bedtime, but it's true. And she is the evil behind everything."

"Evil?" Was there really such a thing as evil?

"There is evil. Jenova is evil. Hojo is evil."

"And you want to change the future?" Raisa asked, remembering what her other self had said earlier.

"I do."

"How?"

"By changing it so that victory is possible." The same answer was repeated.

"How?"

"Shinra is already using Jenova and they are about to make something called SOLDIERs."

"Aren't soldiers just part of the army?" Raisa was confused.

"These SOLDIERs aren't. They are stronger and faster than regular humans. They are what kept Shinra in power for so long in the future. You noticed the glowing eyes of some of them?"

Raisa nodded. Cloud's eyes glowed, the silver haired man's eyes glowed and quite a few of the people in the parade that had been shown to her had glowing eyes as well.

"They are SOLDIERS, or those with the power of one. They have been injected with mako and Jenova. Though not all of them are loyal to Shinra."

"And you think I can stop them?"

"No, we can't stop them. It's already too late for that."

"Then how do you want to change the future?" Raisa blinked at her future self who seemed to be completely calm.

"We have a bit of time yet," the older version said. "The infection doesn't become terminal until Cloud is about twenty one. But I don't want this future to follow closely to the other. I want to change it completely."

The memories Raisa had seen sorted themselves out in her mind becoming a part of her and she could see the way that everything fed into everything else. They fought so hard, her son fought so hard to defeat Sephiroth but each time Jenova became that little bit stronger in the Lifestream until it was too late. The death of the Planet hadn't happened in her son's future, but it was only a matter of time. She could not let the same future play out. She could not even let a parallel future play out. Parallel was too close, they had to take a completely oblique angle.

"There are things we cannot change. The creation of Sephiroth and SOLDIERs is one of them," her future self mused. "Though I admit we could possibly kill Sephiroth while he is a child."

Raisa wasn't sure about killing a child but the memories were clear. Sephiroth was the antagonist in a lot of the fighting. If he didn't exist… "How?" She at least had to consider it.

"He is in Nibelheim but killing him wouldn't change anything," her future self said carefully despite being the one who initially suggested that path. "Jenova is the one who has to be destroyed."

"How?" She seemed to be asking that a lot.

"I don't know."

Raisa blinked, a soft disbelieving smile forming on her features before she took a deep breath. "You show me memories. You've shown me the future. You give me the love you have for Cloud, a love I already have. And you tell me you want to change the future, change those memories that you already have, yet you don't know how?"

"I _do_ have an idea," her future self defended. "It remains to be seen if you will have the courage to take the path I can see… I do not know if it will work. But it will be different, and that could be enough."

"If I have the courage?" Raisa hissed, anger lacing her tone. "If I have the courage?" She repeated. "How _dare_ you suggest that? I have seen your memories. I have _lived_ that future," she continued. In seeing the memories, she had felt everything her future self had; the love for Cloud, his pain and suffering, the pain of the world, of thousands as they cried out when they died. She had lived the future. If her future self was prepared to do it, then there was nothing she was not prepared to try. "If you think there is anything I would not try to spare my son… _our_ son that pain, then you are not fit to be me."

"I was hoping you'd say that," the older woman smiled, her eyes narrowing and it was then that Raisa felt, she knew, they really _would_ change the future.

* * *

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 02/06/2013
> 
> Thank you for all the feedback. There is obviously interest but I will be a bit slow for the moment updating. Say once a month. Hopefully I can speed up when the story gets a bit more interesting.
> 
> Title: A Mother's Love  
> Chapter: 2  
> Author: Jade Tatsu  
> Beta Reader: Furious Winter

It was morning when she woke but the familiar warmth and weight of Damian in the bed beside her was already gone.

:He's going to die you know,: a now familiar voice whispered sadly with a flash of memory. Old memory, grieving memory but Raisa embraced it. She'd already known. As she'd dreamed she had seen that he wasn't there and her subconscious had sought out that memory and so while her heart felt heavy at the knowledge, the memory of Damian's death, it was old grief. She still loved him, she would always love him, but his death could not incapacitate her.

"I thought you would be gone," she said aloud as she rose and dressed before shoving the pot into position over the coals of the fire to heat water.

:I'll be gone soon,: the voice of her future self said easily. :Soon I'll be nothing more than the voice of suggestion, which is your own voice.:

"But will I keep the memories?" There were good and bad memories there. So much pain for Cloud, but for her there were so many little memories she wanted to keep. Cloud's first word, the day he walked and the memory of his smile when he came home bearing marigolds from the high plain. He'd been so proud of himself to reach there so young. She'd been terrified once she realised where he'd been, on the mountain alone, but she had been touched by the flower. She wanted to remember those memories, to live those memories rather than the pain that was to come.

:We can't. If we live those memories nothing will change,: the voice was her own as it snapped at her and Raisa smiled sadly. She knew that. She'd spent hours in talk last night, far longer than the night as the memories in her head became more than memories of memories, they became _her_ memories. She knew the price, she knew the pain and she had an inkling of an idea of what she could do to change it. There would be blood, there would be fighting. As her future self had observed, humans were a violent race and there might even be more fighting and blood shed, at least initially, and Cloud would most likely be in those battles. He was destined to fight for the Planet but he didn't have to fight in the same way he had the first time. She would see to that.

She'd make sure that Shinra was always challenged because that was the only way she could see to make sure they were restrained. When she looked closely the fear of defeat was strong in the memories. Shinra had done great wrong but they would behave, they should show restraint… so long as they knew someone was watching. Raisa would provide that watcher… somehow.

"I know," Raisa said as she gathered the memories close. She would store them in her heart and know that they had happened, even if they never came again.

:We will keep the memories. But there will be new memories to replace them.:

"I know," Raisa repeated, turning to lift Cloud from his covers before she paused.

On the table there was an unfamiliar box. By itself that wasn't unusual. She hadn't adapted to the almost casual sense of personal space the villagers adopted at times. What was unusual was that the box bore the crest of Shinra. She went over and opened it, frowning down at the small, rectangular, individually wrapped bars that were in it.

:Damian left them,: her future self supplied helpfully. : They are protein bars.:

"What do I need protein bars for?"

:You _fainted_ because of low iron levels.:

"I did not."

:I know. But they all think you did, so you will obediently eat a few bars and save the rest.:

"What am I saving them for?"

:The future,: a flash of idea came to her and Raisa smiled, picking up a bar in one hand as she scooped the box into her other arm to put them away. Damian had no doubt pinched these from his employer but no matter how they were gained, she couldn't help but feel touched by the gesture. She didn't like wolf, but it was the major form of protein around here and he knew it, so he'd done his best to provide in another way. It reminded her again why she loved him, why she had moved here with him.

Of course there was another reason and almost as if he knew she was finished with her breakfast he woke up, crying softly, and Raisa let out a small cry of her own as she bustled over to her son, her Cloud. She couldn't help but smile into his blue eyes when he looked up at her expectantly but something stopped her from reaching out to pick up him. She was going to change his future. And despite all the pain she had seen for him, there was also friendship. That would all be gone.

:He will be alive,: her future self reminded her forcefully. :And he can have some of those friendships again.:

Even so, Raisa reached out with one finger, gently tickling it over Cloud's forehead and down over his nose as she smiled back at him when he giggled. Her heart swelled. This was her son and just looking into his baby blue eyes, so clear and defined, was enough for her. She might take away one future, but she would give him a better one, no matter the cost to herself.

"Oh Cloud, I love you," Raisa whispered tenderly before reaching out to pick up her child, holding him close as she shivered. Her future self was silent, focusing on the soft embrace and the child in her arms and Raisa realised that she was crying. Absently, she stroked one hand through Cloud's soft downy hair. It had been so long and she had missed this so much, the familiar scent that was her child. She wouldn't think about the future today; she couldn't think about the future and Raisa stood and moved to one of the large rocking chairs to sit in it. She held Cloud close, swaying gently back and forth.

Just for today, just for now, she would hold him close and pretend that everything was going to be okay, that the future would be bright. Just for now she would forget the actuality that was waiting for him and dream the normal dreams of a mother. She trembled as she held Cloud close, whispering her love to him.

Just for today.

* * *

That's how they found her, Jax and the Mayor, humming a lullaby to Cloud, a soft smile on her face and gentle eyes never leaving her child, memorising his lines. It was painful to interrupt that scene but she had to know and when Raisa looked over at them she knew why they had come.

Her future self had known, she'd known… She just hadn't thought it would be this quickly. She never had the chance to say goodbye. Raisa didn't know what she said to them but they left their condolences and a few items that belonged to Damian on the table. She barely saw them but they were all she had left.

He'd died in the reactor. A pipe had come loose, something had gone wrong and he hadn't known what hit him. But even though the reactors were taking from the planet, the Lifestream was strong in them and his body was gone, going back to the Planet before anyone had any chance to say goodbye. It was a miracle they knew he was gone already and just not late from his shift.

But there, on the table, was his key card; a strange bit of technology that Shinra insisted upon. And his neatly folded clothes lay next to the pail he carried his lunch in. There was no weapon. Mount Nibel was not the safest of places and the wild animals could be brutal but Damian had been a local. He didn't need a weapon and he claimed that if it was a Nibel wolf that ate him, then that would most likely be his own fault for straying on to their territory. It hadn't been. It had been something in the reactor and Raisa couldn't fight the memories of that glowing blue thing. That had been in the reactor? Could that have done something?

:No. A pipe came loose on the second landing gantry and hit him. That's all.: Her voice from the future was sure and while Raisa heard the words, she didn't feel them in her soul. Her Damian was gone. Her sweet, loving, caring husband would never walk back through the door with his little smile and wave. She never got to say goodbye, never got to tell him, one last time, how much she loved him. There was so much she never got to do… so much _he_ never got to do.

He never saw Cloud walk, never heard him say 'Da' and never got to guide him as Cloud became a man they would both be proud of. It wasn't fair. Two days ago she hadn't known this would happen. The memories that lay within her let her know and she knew that the words were truth. A pipe had come loose. It was a simple, stupid accident. Her future self had grieved but she had not and it changed nothing.

Her Damian was gone.

Raisa sat in the chair, holding her Cloud as her thoughts chased themselves around. Her memories old and new seemed to fight a war. Damian's memory was strong and for the moment she embraced it. His blond hair, his soft blue eyes, so much like their son, the way he smiled, in that almost shy way, but you knew when you saw it that he was genuinely happy. Raisa held Cloud close and rocked back and forth, staring at nothing, her thoughts consuming her as she waited for tears to come.

It was Cloud's crying that brought her out of it and initially Raisa didn't know how long she had been…

:Catatonic,: the word was supplied by a disgusted sounding voice but she didn't care as she looked down at Cloud.

He was feebly struggling in her grip and from his cries he wanted to be fed, he wanted to be changed, he wanted everything that a little baby did and while the heavy lethargy of the knowledge that Damian was not there still weighed upon her, Cloud's need pushed through it and she rose. Mechanically, Raisa took care of Cloud's simple wants. She washed him and reclothed him, putting the soiled cloths in a bag to be washed later since she couldn't just let them fall. She mashed some simple food for him and fed him, making sure that he couldn't play and didn't spill it. But she ate nothing for herself and drank nothing save for a tiny sip of water to make sure the temperature was okay for her baby.

As soon as he was changed and fed, Cloud fell asleep though Raisa hadn't missed the stare from his bright blue eyes, the stare that said she better not leave it that long again. She'd almost smiled at that. It was the selfishness of a child too young to do anything for themselves. He had only her… He was not yet the man she had seen, the man who could face the end of everything without even a hint of panic in his gaze.

:And he won't be if you don't take care of yourself.:

She ignored the suggestion as she moved to the table and ran her finger tips over the few trinkets the Mayor and Jax had brought to her. It didn't make sense. How had they known that something had gone wrong? Oh… yeah… The communication device and the people living in the Shinra Mansion. They'd have known… They'd have told the villagers so that they could collect whatever was there. No need to waste their time. It was only one of their employees who had died, no one important, no one who couldn't be replaced. Shinra had promised jobs for everyone in the village when they built that reactor but it had only brought one job while the rest of the village still lived the way they always had. But now Damian's job was gone.

Damian was gone.

It was one thing to know that he was gone, but it was quite another to feel it. She had grieved and the memories of her past grief were strong but her current grief was consuming her. Raisa mechanically climbed into bed after locking the door and lay for a long time, motionless.

She didn't dream but she dreaded waking. Not because Damian would be gone, no, because someone else would be there, someone else was waiting for her to wake with almost infinite patience and there was no escape.

It was inevitable and slowly Raisa opened her eyes. The sun was up and streamed through the little windows into the room and no matter her feelings the bright rays of light softened her heart.

:It's time you got up.:

"It is," Raisa agreed, getting a cup of water. "What do I do now?" Damian was gone. She had a whole set of memories of the future screaming in her head and somehow she was expected to change the world. Great Odin… What was she meant to do now?

:Now? Now you go on. He wouldn't want you to fall because of this. He wouldn't want the planet to fall.:

Raisa bowed her head. The words were true, but it hurt that her future self would use the death of her… _their_ husband to blackmail her. Perhaps it had really been just arrogance that made her think she was prepared to go to the same lengths to save Cloud.

:You will. In time, you will, just not yet.:

Cloud was still asleep and Raisa was thankful that he was such a placid baby. He never really fussed unless he needed something and he slept well. It gave her time to think and, now, time to cry. Astonished, she reached up and felt the tear that was tracing its way down her cheek. "Oh Damian," she whispered, closing her eyes as more tears fell. She would miss him. She would miss him more every day but the weight of memory, of purpose within her, was too strong and she could not deny that. Cloud needed her.

Not the small baby that he was, but the strong, though damaged man he would become.

_If_ she didn't change it.

Raisa rose and went to the door, unlocking and opening it. As expected there were several gifts on the step and she took them in, locking the door again once she had everything inside. She could survive on the charity of the village for a while, but not forever and if she was to change the future, she first had to change her own fate. She needed a job. You only survived if you ate. Her thoughts spun and she took a little bit of bread and cheese from the gifts and made that breakfast before she filled the pot with water and waited for it to heat from stone cold to at least luke warm.

"Shinra needs a watcher," Raisa said aloud as she striped off slowly and ran a damp cloth over her body. Only the Mayor had a real bathroom. The rest of the village made do with what they had for centuries but she didn't mind. The activity was soothing. "And I can't be that watcher," Raisa added. To anyone looking in it would seem as if she was talking to herself but she was sorting out her thoughts, all the odd future thoughts that were still trying to be seen and she was sorting out her priorities.

:The watcher will come in time,: came the confident voice, accompanied by a few scenes of fighting.

She didn't understand but from that, from fighting, she knew that Shinra was still challenged and that would be enough.

"But that watcher didn't stay," Raisa said. "I need them to stay. Why didn't they stay?"

The answer was again shown to her in memory. They had no choice but to surrender. The SOLDIERs were too strong, and though their courage was almost infinite, that was not enough.

She shook her head, drying off as best she could and re-dressing before picking up a comb to begin taking out the tangles in her hair. She had to take it one thing at a time, even the little tasks had to be broken up. While she had enough resources to survive for now times would be very lean if she did not find another source of income… though how did she survive last time?

The memory did not come and Raisa frowned, pushing through the fighting and death and disease, searching for herself. There were many memories of Cloud, more than she thought possible, all of him growing up, but there was nothing of herself, except by association. That was not possible. "What happened?" She demanded softly, still combing her hair.

:It doesn't matter.:

Raisa sensed that her future self was upset and ashamed and her frown deepened. What had she done to survive? "You should tell me, because if I can't find this job I'm going to be back in the exact same situation… And I already know what jobs are like out there," she gestured vaguely towards the door. Realistically, she already knew finding a job in the village was an impossibility. They were tight knit, everyone had their task and everyone did it. There were no tourists you could entertain for some gil, there was nothing but the village and the Shinra Mansion. There was the Inn, but they were staffed already. There was the brewery, but that was a man's domain and what excess they produced was shipped to the supposedly dry Rocket Town. The bakery was jealously guarded by the matronly woman who ran the place. She was essentially going begging, and to receive the condolences of the village when she went out today, but Raisa knew it would be expected. She could grow some vegetables for sale, but most of what she grew she'd need herself and Nibelheim wasn't the most hospitable climate, she'd need to gather her own firewood and that was going to be difficult with a baby.

Survival now with Damian gone was a very difficult thing, but she had to try and she would succeed. She had in the past and she would now, but how had she done it in the past? Raisa glanced over at Cloud who was still sleeping soundly before she turned her attention inwards again.

"What happened?"

:It doesn't matter.:

"It does. You know as well as I do what my prospects are like. What happened?"

The memories were reluctant but they came and Raisa almost wished they hadn't. Despite the bath she had just had, her skin crawled with grime and she rubbed her hands together, dropping the comb and plunging them into the warm water of the basin. "You…" She wasn't sure what she could say at the memory of almost every man in the village touching her… using her… all as if it was their right, as if it was… She didn't know. But she did know that she would likely have to do that again… Raisa brought a handful of water to her face, scrubbing at her skin hard even though she had just washed.

And all through it, every single time she had been named a slut or a whore by the village children, Cloud had stood up for her, defended her and was sometimes beaten for it, but he never backed down, never agreed that they were right. Those memories hurt worse than the others.

"Did he know?"

Her older self sighed deeply. :I think… as he got older… he knew but he never said, never even hinted… but I think he worked it out.:

"Oh my Cloud," more tears threatened to fall.

:I did what I had to,: her other self said quietly. :Something you won't have to because we are going to try something I never did.:

"What?" She asked hopefully.

:We are going to ask at the Mansion.:

Raisa gasped as the plan was laid out to her. The Mansion scared her. It scared all the villagers. It was Shinra's and they stayed away, going up to it only when invited, only on the rare occasions that they had to deliver odd supplies that the company didn't provide. Damian had laughed. He went there on occasion but he was… _had been_ an employee. It was not the same.

But the plan made sense and the back of her throat still felt sick from the memory of the alternative. It was worth a try. Almost anything was worth trying. Reluctantly, Raisa reached up to twist her blonde locks into a knot before reaching down to smooth out her apron. She might have only been wanting a cleaning job there, or anything simple, but she had to look clean herself. That was one of the things she had learned growing up in Kalm, you didn't ask for a job if you looked desperate. Only someone taking pity on you would give you one then. You asked when you looked like you could do it, when you looked like you had alternatives. You had to sell yourself, though Raisa didn't think she'd have much competition at the Mansion. She had to convince them that they needed a cleaner.

She almost snorted at her own thoughts, pushing the memories of Damian that threatened to overwhelm her to the back of her mind as she picked up his keycard and put it gently into one pocket before moving to Cloud. He was still sleeping but he would wake up hungry and carefully Raisa picked him up, slinging her shawl around him so that he rested on her back, a familiar warm weight who was both comforting and would give her strength. She was doing this for Cloud.

Just as she would do the … other things for Cloud if that's what happened.

Resolutely, Raisa walked to the door, unbolting and opening it to blink in the bright morning light. Thankfully, none of the villagers were there, which made it easy for her to walk down the short path to the town centre to turn down the road that lead to the Mansion. She wasn't sure she could handle talking to anyone at the moment, not when she needed all her resolve to approach the Mansion.

The Mansion was something Shinra had built. No one really knew why. Their reactor was high on the mountain and had been there for a long time. While the reactor was being built most of the workers had been housed in little tents on the rough rock outcropping that it was perched on. They came into the town occasionally but there wasn't much interaction between the villagers and the workers. Even once the reactor was finished, it was set to be mostly automatic. Damian had been one of the few routine workers and he never spoke about what he did at the reactor. But Shinra had built the Mansion and people from the Company came and went at odd times. The villagers could tell from the lights that appeared some nights. Sure, there were rumours that it was haunted - the children had a particularly amusing story about a red cloaked vampire - and there were stories that it was a nest of monsters, but no one had ever been able to confirm where the periodic monsters that occasionally approached the village came from, except from the mountain. The rumour persisted that they originated from the Mansion. Besides, those monsters were nothing. They had much fiercer things to deal with in the form or Nibel Wolves and Dragons. As some of the men had joked, when deep in their cups, a few monsters were a welcome change.

But still the Mansion seemed cold to the village, as if it was some giant brooding thing just watching them and it didn't make sense for Shinra to have built such a large house… and then not to use it.

:There are monsters in there,: Raisa started when her future self whispered the words quite clearly to her. :But they are not bat wings or the Ying Yang, they are people. Those are the real monsters.:

She didn't know what a bat wing or a Ying Yang was but she well knew how monstrous people could be and Raisa was not re-assured. "Why tell me this now?" she hissed, reaching out to the big black gate of the Mansion and pushing it open.

:Because you need to know,: was the only reply and the blonde woman shook her head. She needed to know right as she was about to ask them for a job? No… she could have waited until later and Raisa couldn't help but think that her future self somewhat enjoyed the horror stories that abounded around the Shinra Mansion. :They aren't horror stories if they are true.:

The words were not what she needed to hear when she reached out to knock on the door. Consequently the sure but polite knock she had been aiming for with the gesture came out as being weak and timid and Raisa mentally huffed at her companion. She understood why her future self was doing this. It was partly to distract her from the rawness of Damian's death but she didn't have to do it now. She wasn't going to fall apart… again. And, really, a bit of grief was expected no matter how much she had known it would happen, because she'd only really known for a few hours, two days at the most, and she had been unconscious for a lot of that time. That wasn't really knowing.

The door creaked open and Raisa gasped, suppressing a loud squeak at the man who stood there. She knew him. He had been one of the faces that had gone before her. He didn't yet have the scar, but the weight of the world was clearly on his shoulders, though he bore it well. His suit was immaculate and his hair was neatly combed. She felt a sudden premonition of danger from him and knew that while he may look like a man in a suit, he was dangerous.

"May I help you, Ma'am?"

He was _very_ dangerous. His voice was smooth and clear and did not hold even the hint of threat or assessment but she could tell he was looking at her, sizing up every weak point. :Because you present such a threat,: her older self laughed and Raisa was forced to agree. She was a country woman, dressed as a country woman, carrying her baby. If she was anything else, she wouldn't have had the baby and when the man's brown eyes saw Cloud sleeping in her shawl he relaxed very slightly. If she hadn't been looking for it with two sets of eyes, she would have missed it.

"My husband…" Raisa choked on the word unexpectedly.

"Ah, my condolences Mrs. Strife," he said without missing a beat and his voice was genuinely comforting. "It's crass of me but a termination package will be forwarded to you," he added and somehow the words were still comforting.

Raisa shook her head. "It's not that," she managed to get out through a throat that was swelling with tears. "I came..." Why had she come? "I came to ask for a job." she finished in a rush.

The scarred man blinked. "A job, Mrs. Strife?" Suspicion was deep in his tone though he hid it well.

"A job," she confirmed. "Nothing to do with the reactor," she hastened to assure him after her future self nudged her memories of environmental terrorists. "I can't take Cloud up on to the mountain," she added turning to give the now awake Cloud a little smile. He was looking around at everything with wide blue eyes but somehow sensed that his mother couldn't be disturbed so he was silent. "I was thinking something more mundane," Raisa continued, turning back to look the man in the eye. She was not a terrorist, she was not afraid, and she was going to get this job.

"Ma'am?"

"Shinra comes and goes from this mansion at all times of the year. Wouldn't it be much nicer if it was clean and ready for you when you arrived?"

"Ah," understanding seeped into his eyes but the suspicion was still there and Raisa got the impression that this man didn't really trust anyone much. It was a sad way to live. But she knew she had made a point with him. His suit was immaculate. It could not be easy keeping it that way if he had to traipse around a dusty mansion… What was he doing here anyway? Internally, Raisa shook her head. It didn't matter what a man in a blue suit was doing in the Shinra Mansion. It did not concern her. Getting this job did. "I will enquire," he said finally, giving her a small nod that was an obvious dismissal.

"Thank you, Sir," Raisa replied, returning the nod and turning to leave. "I will wait in the village." She felt his eyes on her the entire way down the path and the sense of being watched only vanished once she had re-entered the village. She'd glanced back once, and given the man who was still standing in the open door a tiny wave before she had been on her way.

With that task done and her future self reasonably sure that they would hire her on as a menial, she had a far harder job to do now. She had to face the villagers… and their condolences. Raisa banished her grief so that it could not overwhelm her. She relied on the memories of grieving to give her a false sense that she had already come to terms with Damian's death as she walked into the village square. She didn't like it, but this had to be done and she couldn't do it any other way.

* * *

It wasn't until later in the evening that Raisa received her answer. The day had been long but she felt she had accepted the condolences and advice and presents from the villagers well and she had been looking forward to the solitude of the evening. She had taken Damian's keycard from her pocket when she reached her house again and had pulled up one of the loose floor boards from under the rug and put the card there. No one had asked for it, and it smelt of Damian so she didn't want to give it up. It would be safe there, a memory of him that she would know so that every day, he would be with her, giving her strength to go on from below.

Later, when Raisa was putting Cloud to bed, there was a knock on the door. She didn't rush to it, but did answer with good time and was not surprised to see the brown haired man standing there.

"Sir," she greeted him, unsure if she should invite him in.

"Mrs. Strife," he greeted her formally and Raisa could well imagine the watching eyes from the surrounding houses. It was only then that she realised she should have indicated she would come back for an answer. No matter, it was too late now and when the villagers asked, she'd simply tell them the truth. She'd asked for a job. They'd tsk and tout but the men would understand. They would support her for a while, in respect of her loss, but not forever.

"Would you like to come in?"

"No, thank you," the words seemed genuine, especially with the cold nip of the wind. Nibelheim was never what one would call warm. "I won't keep you long since I know you must have much to do." That was a lie. She had nothing to do, not once the light faded and she was expected to be in mourning, but she let that go. "I came by to say that your services would be greatly appreciated."

Raisa smiled and she felt the burden lifting from her. It would not be much money, but it would be enough. "Thank you, Sir," she said, letting her heartfelt thanks echo through her words and she was unaware of the ethereal beauty her smile gave her.

"Report at 9am tomorrow and someone will show you what is to be done. Though I give you warning now, the Mansion is not just a house. It is a place of work for Shinra. There are places you will not be allowed to go, and any trespassing into those areas will result in your immediate termination."

"I understand, Sir," Raisa said, not showing that she understood far more than he probably thought she did. This man didn't mean that Shinra would terminate her job if she went where she wasn't welcome. No, their solutions were much more permanent and the Raisa of three days ago would not have known that. The Raisa of now was all too aware and she struggled to suppress a shiver. The way the man said it was matter of fact. He was too accustomed to death. "I will report at 9am tomorrow, and will only work in the areas assigned to me."

"Very good, Ma'am," the man said with a small smile, once more bowing his head slightly to her as he turned and walked back towards the Mansion.

Raisa closed the door behind him once he had left her garden and with trembling legs she made it to the table and sat down. Relief had flooded through her at his words but further implications were now becoming clear. She could survive for now without going down the path her future self had, but that would not do anything to change the future. She still had that problem to attend to and with her own survival now assured, it loomed larger than ever.

Everything that Shinra was, was embodied in that man. He was well dressed and well-spoken, but hovering just beneath the surface was violence. Nothing would be allowed to stand in his path, and if it did, it would be removed. And in the future she remembered, Shinra had gone down that path, removing every obstacle they encountered with a callous disregard for life, for the Planet. By the time anyone realised they had gone so far, they had become necessary… How did she stop that? How did she keep a watcher?

:You'll answer that in time,: her future self spoke. :I'd better tell you about the Mansion.:

"What about the Mansion?"

It wasn't as if Raisa couldn't just 'remember' the information. A lifetime of information had been put into her head… more than a lifetime really but it was easier with the guidance her future self provided and Raisa wondered if the woman would remain there forever.

:Not forever. I'll fade as the days go on, as you become more comfortable with the knowledge and I won't be necessary. I told you that already.:

Raisa shook her head, and reached up to push her fringe back behind her ear. "What about the Mansion?" she asked again.

:This is the place where they are conducting the initial experiments to create SOLDIERs. They are raising Sephiroth here… Or they will be, for a few years.:

"Sephiroth…" Raisa whispered the name. He was the one who had hurt Cloud so many times. He was the one at the centre of it all.

:He is, and he isn't. It's JENOVA who must be destroyed,: her future self said enigmatically.

"Will I meet him?"

:Who?:

"Sephiroth."

:Maybe. I don't know how much interaction they will allow him to have with the menials. You won't meet him overnight, that's for sure.:

Raisa took a deep breath as she thought. She hadn't really agreed with her future self's earlier suggestion that she could kill Sephiroth. At this point, he was still just a child, but he was _so central_ to the destruction in the future. The more she saw, the more she remembered, the more the suggestion didn't seem so monstrous.

:Heh… He's not the one to worry about.:

"Who is then?"

:Hojo,: came the reply, accompanied by a memory of Cloud screaming while a man in a white coat cut into him, all the while muttering something under his breath.

She managed to pull her fingers back from her palms before the nails cut into them, but never the less her nails left impressions that stung deeply as she growled.

:All you need to do for the moment is survive and raise Cloud. The path to the future will open in time. Keep your eyes open in the Mansion, though. There are many things you can learn there that will be beneficial. There are many things I remember that you don't yet know.:

"What?"

:You've only begun to touch my memories. I've a pretty good idea about how to change the future and you'll have the same idea when you absorb all the information,: the woman who was her said easily. :For now, all you need to do is focus on living. There is time yet.:

Raisa nodded, poking around in her own mind. If there really was a lifetime of memories in her head, then there were those she would not know until something triggered it. She'd just have to find the triggers so that she could change Cloud's future. There was no way, _no way_ that she would let him live through that torture again. The thought of killing the child Sephiroth did grate upon her morals, no matter what she could remember him doing to her Cloud. At least in most of the memories, they were fighting, neither was defenceless and her boy always won. Not always uninjured, or without great pain, but he won.

With the few memories she had seen of Hojo, cutting into her Cloud, making him scream or the worse memory of when he could no longer scream, the thought of killing him awoke nothing. If she saw no way to change the future, then that would be her method. She would at least kill Hojo, kill the man who had hurt Cloud so deeply and so needlessly.

This, she vowed.

One way or another, Hojo would not survive to the future.

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: A Mother's Love  
> Chapter: 3  
> Author: Jade Tatsu

* * *

Time passed, as time tends to. Things changed, and things remained the same. Little Cloud grew into a sturdy lad who was serious but always had an easy smile for his mother. Raisa continued to work at the Mansion, much to the perceived horror of the villagers… who would pump her for information about the goings on in Shinra at every opportunity.

Of course, not everything was perfect. After all people make mistakes and Shinra's scientists weren't the most consistent of men. What they wanted one day changed the next and inevitably Raisa fell afoul of their changing ways. One scientist had given her instructions to clean and _tidy_ the room during the day while they worked, another did not appreciate her moving the papers around.

And unfortunately for Raisa, the other was Professor Hojo. From her memories she was quite surprised to see him in the upper part of the Mansion but it made sense. Psychotic and delusional he may be, but he was still human, he still needed to sleep and sleeping in a Lab lost its appeal pretty quickly. She had been wrapped in cold terror when the suited people, who she remembered were called the Turks, had hauled her before the Professor as he paced in his tidied room, muttering to himself about interference in his important work.

"You! What have you done?" The distracted Scientist had hissed at her the moment she'd been brought through the door.

Raisa looked around, though she kept her blue eyes lowered. "I cleaned, Sir," she replied, and was proud that there was no tremor in her voice. Her future self had gone months back, becoming a part of her just as much as the memories of the future were. But her memories were clear on exactly how dangerous this man was.

"Cleaned! Cleaned!" Hojo repeated the word, his voice rising by an octave each time. " _Snooped_ is more like it! You touched these papers!"

"Well, of course, Sir," Raisa tried to sound reasonable and there was no point in denying what she had done. "The former resident told me to tidy all papers, and to leave them neatly stacked on the tall boy."

Her reply seemed to make the Professor pause for a moment, as if he could not comprehend anyone daring to speak back to him. Raise kept herself calm somehow, but she could feel cold seeping into her arms and legs. This was dangerous. Even now the man before her was insane. She understood the dangers that the Turks represented. They would have no hesitation about shooting her if so ordered, but there was logic with their actions. Professor Hojo had no such logic and even Raisa could see how he acted was dictated by a whim. This was meant to be one of the most powerful men in Shinra? She could see why they needed the watcher, why they needed restraint and why things had gone so wrong when neither existed.

"You were snooping," Hojo said firmly, not even listening to her explanation. "Who are you spying for?"

Raisa blinked. _Who was she spying for?_ She was spying for herself but that answer was not one that they expected or would accept. "No one, Sir," she objected before she looked down at the ground, with every evidence of shame in her posture. "I can't… Sir, I can't read," she added with a rush.

"What?" the demand was harsh.

"I can't read, Sir," Raisa repeated in a small voice. _She_ couldn't read. Her future self could and had picked up the skill in the Lifestream and while they were now one being, the fact still remained; she could not read and there was no evidence anywhere for anyone to find of her ever learning the skill. Her future self had learned quite a bit more than mere reading, but there were some things that were in this Mansion that she needed to learn. Not yet, of course, not with Hojo watching. That was why she had years to collect the information, a piece here, a nudge to memory there. It would all fall into place in time.

But not if Hojo threw her out… or worse… kept her.

"Of course you can… everyone…" Hojo said though his voice did trail off and he began muttering to himself again. Raisa just stood, looking down at the ground and so she was surprised when a few moments later the Professor shoved a piece of paper under her nose. "Read it," he commanded.

"I can't," Raisa said, careful to let the tears forming in her eyes not fall on the paper. That would really arouse his wrath.

"All children are taught something of letters, even backwater, provincial children born in a pimple of a town like this, so _read it!_ " The Professor obviously did not believe her and thought she came from Nibelheim… which would work for her, but a quick check of her records would show she was from Kalm… A town which should have a higher level of general education.

"I was not born here, I was born in Kalm," Raisa said, offering the information before one of the Turks could correct Hojo and put her deeper into trouble for 'attempting to conceal the truth' which was what a spy would do. "I do recognise some letters and words on this Sir," she continued. "We were taught, but only to the point where we could read and write our own names. That was deemed sufficient for our requirements."

"Yet your dictation is very clear," the Professor's black eyes narrowed, clearly showing his suspicion.

"My family worked as servants for the Mayor in Kalm and he expected his helpers to at least sound educated," she said, looking back at Hojo though still keeping her general gaze directed towards the floor. Looking him in the eye would be considered defiance and a challenge against his authority. She was not doing that. She would not do that.

His glance towards the suited man standing behind her was telling and Raisa felt the other man nod. It didn't clear her, but at least it confirmed she was telling the truth.

The paper was snatched back and Raisa suppressed a grimace as the sharp edges cut small lines into her hands. Blood leaked but did not drip from the tiny cuts and she carefully turned her hands over so that the rich red liquid stayed on her skin.

Hojo's anger appeared to have abated somewhat but she was still wary. He was tempestuous and flighty but if he felt he had been slighted, Hojo held a grudge for a very long time. He was muttering again and she didn't like the tone. The few words she could hear where those you never wanted Hojo to say. "Experiment… could be fascinating…. an illiterate… …how does… find…." After several moments he looked up again, seeming to gaze into the distance. "But what purpose would it serve?" the final question came and both Raisa and the suited men behind her knew better than to answer.

Black eyes speared her and Raisa felt the weight of the world upon her. It took a supreme amount of effort not to tremble. "When I am in residence, you may clean and dust, make the bed and take down the rubbish but you may _never_ touch the papers here? Am I clear?"

The blonde woman swallowed hard, despite the fact the movement would be seen, she didn't care. She was afraid, she had every reason to be afraid, especially with the memories of what this man was capable of, what Shinra would let him do. "Yes, Sir," she whispered clearly, not willing to have her nerves tempt him to any further punishment. "I will make the bed, dust, clean and take the rubbish out, but only that which is in the bin and I will do no further in your quarters while you are here."

Hojo's black eyes narrowed as he tried to deduce if the native woman before him was being smart with him but he decided not. He knew the signs of fear well enough, his subjects were imprinted with fear for him but it was gratifying to see it in another even if, or maybe especially because, the other was a mere menial. They should know their place. Her claim seemed to be reasonable, but he would have the Turks check her back ground again. There was no need to be sloppy and he would have her watched. He vaguely knew they'd put on a village woman as a cleaner but he hadn't really cared. They could not afford to have some Avalanche spy this close though.

"Get out of here," Hojo commanded and Raisa wasted no time in scrambling out of the room. She'd leave early today and make up any cleaning tomorrow. Not that the Mansion required much cleaning but it was her job. Today she'd go and spend time with Cloud because after dealing with Hojo, she needed the comfort only her son could give her.

* * *

In years to come, Raisa would think back on that memory and no matter the cold dread that had filled her at the time, she would laugh. Hojo was stupid. There was simply no way around that conclusion when you looked at the facts. In this world, or in the future only she remembered, Hojo was stupid. He was so focused on what he expected to find that he did not see the truth of the matter, the things that really mattered, the things that really held power. In some ways he was frighteningly easy to fool, though in others he was a monster. No matter how deluded his research was, there were aspects of that research where he was genuinely the world leader, and on how to enhance humans he was the best. Though his enhancements involved Jenova. He never considered alternatives.

Raisa had not read his notes. That day she genuinely had not had the time, but other days she had and it was on those days that she learned little things that would prove useful for the future. But the future is not born just of knowledge, it's born of actions, of memories and from people. Though for Raisa much of the time she didn't care, she was too busy raising her beautiful boy. It was odd, having one set of memories, replacing them with another but Raisa enjoyed that. This way she got twice as much joy from seeing her young Cloud achieve the normal things that growing children did. Of course, she always enjoyed the quiet time, just before he fell asleep. It was during that time as he nestled against her, his blond hair soft beneath her hands and his warmth snuggled comfortably against her side that she felt completely at peace. The pain and suffering in her memories were worth it then. She would change everything, all for the trusting boy at her side, all for her Cloud. She always had a story for him and while he may not completely understand the words, she made sure he understood the implications.

She always asked him one question, just before he fell asleep, every night and every night the answer was the same. "Who do you kill Cloud?"

"Jenova," was the reply, though sometimes his voice mumbled the name and when he was younger he couldn't pronounce it properly but the answer was always the same.

"Very good, Cloud. You kill Jenova. You _always_ kill Jenova, even if you have a choice, always Jenova. I don't know if I can save him Cloud, but if Jenova is dead, perhaps he won't need saving."

Most of the time Cloud never asked who 'he' was, since her beloved baby fell asleep, but as he grew older, and more able to fight the sand demon, sometimes he asked.

Raisa always smiled at him then, brushing one hand over his blond hair, smoothing it down. "Not yet, my little Cloud, it's not yet time to know. I'll tell you when the path is clear."

And by that stage Cloud had usually fallen asleep.

One thing Raisa didn't understand was that as her Cloud grew to understand the words, he also understood what she was not telling him. Her son translated her stories and looked at the implications and the requirements to make them real. While she was working she had to leave him, though when he was still a babe in arms she'd been able to carry him with her, discretely having him wrapped in her shawl at her back. Once he was old enough, she left him in the house. The blonde woman didn't like it, but she had no choice. As he grew older, he began exploring, first the village and Raisa was regaled with stories of what he had discovered in the villager's yards, and then later in the fields surrounding the village. Nibelheim's climate might have been unsuited to large scale agriculture, but they had a fair market garden around the village. They had to eat somehow. But what Raisa did not know was exactly how far Cloud's exploring was taking him. The flowers he brought her were beautiful, and if she'd been a local, she would have known that the Glory of the Snow _only_ came from the high plateau and she would have known that her little Cloud was exploring far beyond the relative safety of the fields, that he was going into the true wilds.

The village children knew but they could seldom catch Cloud and their attempts to bully him to stay closer to Nibelheim, as their parents instructed them, just made him more of an outcast. Indeed many of the children secretly admired him though they would never say it. Cloud was an outsider to them, not that he noticed because he was usually so busy.

His mother had told him stories of heroes since he was young, of a warrior for the Planet who could swing a blade taller than himself with the greatest of ease, who could stand against armies and win. The imagery captured the active imagination of Cloud and he could see himself fighting. It was childish but it was a happy thought but as he grew older, he began to know things. Just little things that didn't seem to make much sense. He knew for example when there would be a frost so that they should cover the beans, he knew when the first snow was coming but he thought nothing of it. In the village of Nibelheim reading the weather was a skill many possessed but what Cloud didn't know was that he was reading further, seeing more in the natural land around him as he explored. He knew the marks of the wolves and how to avoid them, he knew the marks of the dragons and where to go so that they would not consider him either food or a threat. And he knew where the rabbits hid and the other small animals who sometimes came close to him. He didn't hunt, so he was accepted and he learned so much about the world that he could feel that change in the air that signals the seasons moving.

But there was one further thing he knew from his Mother's stories. Warriors were fit. Not just the fitness of the villagers who were strong and hardy, but fitness that came with exertion, with fighting day after day. He couldn't fight, but he could make sure he was strong, and that's what Cloud did. Once he was old enough and aware enough to start venturing out beyond the fields, every day Cloud tried to run just that little bit further, pass the markers on the route to the high plateau, just that little bit faster and once he was there, he tried, every day to move the rocks on the field. Most were too large for him, but one day, one day he'd be able to move them.

His Mother might doubt her ability to save 'him' but Cloud would help there. He'd be strong enough, he'd be fast enough that they could kill Jenova and save whoever it was that his Mother referred to. So that's why every day he trained, and every day he learned a little bit more about the world. He brought his Mother flowers, sometimes asking the older villagers about any special traits the flowers and other cuttings he brought back might have. If the other children weren't around, the old folk were usually happy to tell him. If the kids were near, they usually insisted that he go off to play. Still over time he began to know which were the useful plants and which weren't and he always brought some back for Jax, the old brewery Master who was also the best healer the town had.

For all that he was focused, while growing up there was a certain sense of loneliness about Cloud. He wanted to talk to the other children, to play with them but something always got in the way. Sometimes it was him, he didn't want to talk about the same things they did, and sometimes it was them, they were in awe of his ability to go beyond the boundaries of the village, something they never thought they would do themselves. Things remained as they were, until one day, when Cloud was seven, almost eight and it was early winter.

A storm came out of nowhere, a thundersnow storm. If Cloud had of been in the village he would have seen the warning signs, he would have been taken into someone's house for the duration since at the height of a thundersnow it was far too dangerous to even attempt to move between houses. Unbeknownst to Cloud, his mother was trapped at the Shinra Mansion where she thought her son was safely in the village while he was in reality caught on the high plateau.

His first mistake that day had been to ignore the rumble of thunder. But in the Nibel Mountains, the rumble of thunder was almost always present, or was merely a dragon roaring in the distance. But then the wind had shifted and Cloud had looked up at the sky and had seen the clouds. Dark heavy clouds, pregnant with snow yet lashed by lightning. If he had of been near the village he would have made it, but even if he'd seen the cloud's from the first moment, he was too far, too high in the mountains to make it back safely and Cloud wondered what he could do.

He had to find shelter quickly. That meant he had to drop down from the high plateau into the forest where the trees would provide at least a little cover from the wind-blown snow and the biting cold that would accompany it. But where could he shelter? By themselves the trees would not be enough. Perhaps if he found a fallen one he could pile leaves under it but that was dubious at best. All the children of Nibelheim were taught from a young age how to survive as best they could but few needed to use that knowledge. It hadn't made much sense at the time, when they'd all been forced to sit down in the town centre and listen to the lectures. After all, none of them could even imagine being on Mount Nibel alone, with a snowstorm coming, let alone a thundersnow but Cloud was glad, even as he ran towards the edge of the plateau, towards the forest, that he had listened, and that the elders had insisted upon it.

The wind was intense and Cloud sent up a silent prayer to Odin that the main storm would hold off long enough for him to find shelter. He'd worry about food later, though with the storm being so early in the season it should hopefully be intense and short. Which made the need for shelter all the more important.

Almost before he knew it Cloud was racing through the krummholzed trees that marked the beginning of the forest, and then he was under them, his feet stirring up the scent of pine. It was usually dark in the forest, but with the gathering clouds the gloom was almost complete, but Cloud had run through this forest so many times in the past that he knew where he should be going which was a problem. The way back to the village did not have anything he could use for shelter. He needed to deviate from his path but he didn't know which direction to go.

All around him were trees and while a cave would provide the best and safest shelter, providing that there were no landslides, he didn't know where any were… at least not close. Cloud continued to run towards the village as he looked around and then he spotted it; wolf spore. It was relatively fresh and without thought Cloud changed his course turning to following it. The wolves would have a den and hopefully he could slink in on the outside of it. He should be able to ward them off, so that they didn't think he was a meal, the fragrant pods in his back pocket would help him be unappetising, and even if they did think of him as a meal, he had to take the chance. The heavy clouds were drawing closer, too close for him to waste any further time trying to find somewhere to hide.

With a grace seldom seen in humans Cloud ran, jumping logs and small ditches with ease always following the tracks of the wolves. As he ran he could see that there were more tracks which was good, that meant the path was well travelled and he was getting closer to their den. Perversely he wasn't worried, something whispered to him that he would be fine.

But just before he broke through the trees to the minor bluff where he could see the small opening that he knew was the wolves den he heard a small yip. Pausing, Cloud looked around, mindful of the increasing bite in the wind but it did not take long before he saw it, a small wolf pup, struggling under a branch. The pine needles were still green so it was obvious that the branch had fallen recently, trapping the pup and without thought Cloud was there, reaching through the branches, ignoring the way the needles pricked his flesh as he extended his arms. Carefully he pulled aside the tangled limbs and gently placed one hand on the wolf cub. The little hisses stopped and the pale yellow eyes looked up at him and young as he was, Cloud could see confusion there. He smiled at the cub but continued working and soon he had extracted the young wolf from the branches. It was injured. The fall of the branch had left lacerations but it appeared otherwise unharmed, no bones felt broken. He didn't really have time to check because the wind was picking up and carried on it were the first few snowflakes. They drove into him, wetting his cloths while the wind cut through to the bone. Cloud didn't hesitate and instead took the last few strides towards the den before he jumped into it, holding the squirming little wolf close to him.

He reached the cover of the den none too soon, for behind him the harsh wind drove the snow into the ground and there was a hair raising clash of thunder followed by the unmistakable roar of lightning hitting the ground where Cloud and the wolf pup had been but a moment before. The scent of ozone drifted to him.

Cloud closed his blue eyes briefly, bringing his breathing back under control as he squirmed away from the frigid cold just outside. The den was well situated so while the wind howled outside, the lip at the opening blocked the worst of it and kept the heat in. As his breath calmed he became aware of eyes watching him, some glowing yellow, blue, green, grey and brown. They were all watching him and in the darkness Cloud couldn't make out the individuals but he could feel them, and sense them all there. They weren't quite sure what to make of him and while it would usually make sense to let them smell him, and thus to make the first move, Cloud knew he had to show them he was friendly. He crooned at the wolves, low in his throat, nothing that sounded like a growl, but just a soft noise, one he hoped was soothing.

There was a snarl and Cloud caught the impression of teeth being bared at him. He couldn't see them but he knew they were there.

"No, no," Cloud said, his voice calm. "It's okay, I won't hurt you," he added though it was somewhat silly. These were Nibel Wolves, he could not hurt them… well he could hurt a young one but he was sure the pack leader was the one growling. He held up his hands, moving the young wolf pup that had still been held to his chest out to them. Their vision was so much better than his so hopefully they would understand that he was giving them back their puppy and from that, they would know he was a friend.

Outside the wind howled and whistled and the wolves crowded closer together.

"Shhh," Cloud soothed. The little puppy was disoriented for a moment when he felt his own kind around him, but then he squirmed around and made his way back to the boy who had rescued him. Cloud felt the warm from the pup under his hands as the small wet tongue licked at him. It was nice that none of the wolves had bitten him yet, but he still had to do something. Without knowing what he was doing he began to sing. " _Day is done, gone is the sun_ ," he crooned gently, smiling at the irony. Day was not done but the sun was definitely gone, covered by the thick clouds and snow that were outside. " _From the lakes, from the hills, from the sky, all is well, safely rest,_ " he hoped he could safely rest here, just while the storm raged outside. " _Odin is nigh_ ," he sang, finishing the short little lullaby.

The wolves still watched him but Cloud sensed that they were calmer and he felt a moment of panic before he realised he should keep signing. While he did that, they seemed quieter, and likely to accept him. Outside the wind continued to scream and he could hear the clash of thunder and feel the boom of the lightning that was lashing the land but here in the den there was only humid darkness and the glowing eyes of the wolves. He remembered a song his mother sometimes sang about winter and wolves. It seemed appropriate. " _The wolves howl and the ravens croak, the waking of a new dawn, campfires and their black smoke, time to store the wheat and corn_ ," He could use a camp fire right now with the wind howling at his back. " _Winter approaches with freezing wind, the realm of lords of hunting, hares and deers were skinned, and back in the farm the pig's grunting_."

The wolves growled softly at him and from the way they sounded they were being calmed by his voice. Not even the loud crash from the world outside seemed to be concerning them. They seemed to be clinging to his words and Cloud had a vision of them watching him with their ears pricked up and eyes half closed. He kept singing, not even sure what he was saying as he continued the ballad. Though as he sang he moved a bit closer into the den, feeling the brush of fur under his hands. He was surprised at how soft it was and the warmth it radiated.

The wind outside screamed, the snow and the lightning pounded into the ground and Cloud sung, his voice tender and around him the gently glowing eyes of the wolves closed and they allowed him to move further into the den, into the warmth that their bodies gave him. The storm raged outside and the young blond boy snuggled deep into the den, drawing comfort from the wolves around him. As time passed he formed fewer words and his voice became just a croon and eventually his eyes became heavy and his breathing levelled out and he felt asleep, warm and content and safe from the wind and cold outside.

* * *

Raisa had thought her son at home, or in one of their neighbours' homes during the early season thundersnow. She had been trapped in the Shinra Mansion and had therefore completed her days, and the next day's duties early and she'd fallen asleep there, huddled in the kitchen with a blanket wrapped around her. When the next day dawned, and the sun had spilled into the valley that held the little village of Nibelhiem, she had been one of the first out the door, shielding her eyes from the glare of the sun on snow but determined to reach her Cloud.

She wasn't worried, he would be fine, but she needed to see her son, needed to see his smile and feel his soft blond hair under her hands.

When she reached her home and he wasn't there, the first stirring of worry crossed over her mind but she ruthlessly suppressed it. It was early. Cloud was probably with a neighbour and they wouldn't let him go until giving him breakfast and so she made her own meal and waited. An hour went by and he was not there so she waited some more and despite her iron will, the worry grew. This was not something she remembered but she also knew that while she had made no overt alteration to the present, even the small change of her working at the Mansion, saving every last gil she earned there, was bound to cause ripples. But no ripple was meant to endanger her son!

She forced herself to wait further, watching the old clock as time travelled with infinite patience. But Raisa was not patient. She needed to see her Cloud, needed to know he was okay yet she knew that haring over the village, looking for him with everyone would raise more questions than it answered so she sat, and waited, and waited. If he was not back by mid morning, then she would search, Raisa decided, though the waiting was hard. The thought of her Cloud shivering in the snow was worse.

Time passed and her worry grew but just as Raisa was heading towards the door to raise the alarm, there came the soft crunch of small feet moving in the snow and her heart sored. The last few steps towards the door were taken at a run and heedless of losing the warmth from the house she flung it open to see her Cloud, walking up the path, bathed in the blazing sunlight.

That was all she needed and the next instant her arms closed around her son, pulling him upwards as she swung around. He was almost too big for her to lift him, but she needed this and in the blazing light of the sun she laughed, pure relief echoing through the tone. "Oh Cloud," Raisa breathed.

"Mum!" Cloud objected, though he could sense his mother's relief. She had been worried about him and he knew that for the next few days he'd be kept closer to the village.

"Cloud!" Raisa repeated and then laughed again when her son's stomach growled and he blushed. "Come inside," she said, putting Cloud back on the ground and turning back towards the house. "I'll fix you some breakfast." She could talk to him about where exactly he had been while he ate because through her relief she had not missed the dirt and grime that smudged his clothes. She knew what that meant. He'd been on the mountain and her gut had twisted with fear. On the mountain in a thundersnow… but he was back with her… That was all that mattered.

She was so intent on her son that she almost missed the soft crunch of snow following them back into the house… _Almost_ missed but she had been in Nibelhiem long enough to know you did not ignore those warnings and Raisa spun, turning back with her arms raised to protect against…

To protect against a very small Nibel Wolf cub that looked up at her with soft yellow eyes, mouth open in almost a smile, revealing small white teeth.

"Cloud, go back into the house," Raisa ordered, her eyes never leaving the wolf. It might only be a cub but the Nibel Mountains weren't known for their ability to breed cute and fluffy animals. Everything living on the mountains, including the humans were tough and strong and it was a battle between all to survive. It was not a malicious battle, it just was and while this cub was young, and fairly weak, it would attack her if able.

"No." She almost didn't hear her son's reply against her but she did feel his hand on her elbow. He tugged at her but she could not look away. The cub might be alone, it might not but she had to deal with the danger she could see. It should not be in the village but with a thundersnow who knew what animals might have gotten lost.

"Cloud, now!" Raisa insisted, trying very hard to keep the worry out of her tone but she knew her son had heard the stress.

"No," he repeated and before she could stop him, Cloud dodged around her, heading for the cub.

"Cloud, no!" She didn't know what to think! Cloud was more familiar with the wilds around Nibelheim than she was. He knew how dangerous the Wolves were! He could not be doing this.

All she could do was watch as her precious Cloud reached out one hand to the wolf cub who tentatively sniffed it before licking it. And then her Cloud did the most outrageous thing, he picked up the cub and turned back to her, looking all the world like a boy with his puppy. "See?" he asked her, his blue eyes wide with innocence. "It's all okay. He followed me back."

"Followed you back?" Raisa heard herself ask in a daze. Not even having several years worth of future memories imposed in her head had been this surprising.

Cloud looked to the ground and she recognised his guilty movement. "I'm sorry Mum, I was on the mountain. I couldn't get back down in time so I had to find shelter," he began the explanation and she knew where he was going. "I found a wolf den."

The fact that the Nibel Wolves hadn't eaten her Cloud was before her but Raisa could not help the stab of worry that pierced her at his explanation. It made sense, it was logical. If her boy had been on the mountain when the thundersnow came then he would need shelter and a wolf den was shelter… even with the risks it had.

"And now the wolf has followed you home?" She asked, raising one eyebrow to add emphasis to the question.

Cloud nodded, his head still downcast.

"And I suppose you want to keep him?"

Blue eyes looked up at her, startled and Raisa suppressed the smile. Apparently she wasn't meant to have anticipated that question. Ah, the logic of children. It was so sweetly direct. "We will discuss this, after we discuss your punishment," she said, as she turned back towards the house trusting that Cloud would have let her know if there were other Wolves about.

She heard him sigh before his feet followed her, crunching more heavily than usual through the snow that blanketed the ground with the weight of the wolf cub in his arms. But he followed without a hint of disobedience and as some of her memories surfaced, Raisa suppressed a smile. This was her son. This was her boy who would help anyone and anything and who could always be counted upon to find the most unusual solutions to problems, so perhaps she shouldn't be shocked that he found shelter from a thundersnow in a wolf den, and perhaps she should not be surprised that one of those wolves found its way back with her son. If the cub could be trained it would be good company for him. She could not deny that, and would provide him with some protection against the wilds of Nibelheim. He was not going to escape punishment, but perhaps it might not be as dire as he was no doubt expecting. Taking care of a young pup would be challenge enough… And would keep him closer to home.

Raisa smiled, holding the door for Cloud as he stamped the snow from his boots before entering. Perhaps this was for the best but she would not let him know that, not yet but in time. And perhaps this was the will of the Planet… Her past self always said the Planet loved Cloud but never said anything more than that and Raisa had not found the answers in memory. Imperceptibly she sighed. Shinra, the Planet, Cloud… there was so much going on that even she did not understand. But she would. And she would change the future.

At the moment, the present had all of her attention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song taken from: www . odins - gift . com and is 'Surpassing the Winter' by Arith Harger
> 
> Thanks for reading and feel free to give me something to read in return!
> 
> Jade


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 4  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

There was a fringe benefit to Cloud's wolf that Raisa hadn't foreseen. In order to feed the growing puppy her son learned to hunt and sometimes he brought home more meat than the wolf could eat. They ate it then, or sold it, and the pelts of the animals were cured and sold. It didn't make that much difference to their daily income but any difference was welcome. Raisa knew she lived much closer to the edge than she needed but with what was coming she preferred the safety of savings.

Cloud never complained, and he became proficient at fixing things. Nothing too complicated but he could fix or at least successfully tinker with most of the equipment in the village. He was never allowed into the Brewery, that was sacred ground, but the well and almost all other common areas, he had patched up at some time. Raisa continued to work at the Mansion. The pay was meagre but she did her duties well and was now allowed to clean the whole mansion but never the basement. She wasn't sure if she was meant to know the basement existed so never mentioned it. The rest was enough and almost every day she gathered information, snippets that would be useful later from the glances at papers the scientists left strewn around haphazardly. She was filling in the blank spaces of her memory.

Cloud grew and his wolf grew and Raisa allowed herself one indulgence, paying for the use of a camera. It was a simple photo, taken in the full light of the summer sun; Cloud and his wolf, playing in a thin waterfall. It was a warm shot and Raisa smiled every time she looked at it. Her boy had grown so much! And his wolf cub was all gangly with its own growth. They were growing together and she had seen them hunting once. It was almost a foregone conclusion the way they moved together. Truly the wolf was a gift from the Planet but already Raisa knew she was going to have a hard time enforcing her rules.

After the thundersnow where Cloud had gained his furry companion, he had been confined to the village for two weeks. That had not been much of a punishment because he had the wolf cub to distract him but after that he had been forbidden from going to the high plains except at the height of the short mountain summer. That had been harder to enforce and except for one escorted visit to pick herbs the village needed Cloud had obeyed. But his wolf had been young then and able to be worn out in the surrounds of the village. The wolf was larger now, and needed more space and Raisa knew that obeying her rules was beginning to chafe against her son. He was not rebellious by nature but he did miss the mountain. She could see it in his eyes.

It was one thing she would have to deal with when the time came. What Raisa didn't know was that her son had been continuing his training, such as it was. The old master Zangan had passed through the village a few times and while Cloud had been obliquely praised in terms of his fitness, the master had not given him any training. No, that was all going towards the Mayor's Daughter. It had hurt, a little, but Cloud had seen how training with Zangan tied him down. He wouldn't have been able to see to his wolf, and he wouldn't have been able to roam the mountain fields. And so after spying on their training a few times he was content.

He had learned things though, just from watching and while he was confined closer to the village, he worked on agility. It was easy, he and his wolf played tag and chase and all sorts of silly games until Cloud was able to dodge in any direction, to jump and leap and sidle under obstacles. He came home covered in mud most days, his golden hair brown but with his Mother working so late at the Mansion, he could clean up before she saw it. And wolf always liked falling into the mountain streams and the way that Cloud would pat him all over cleaning away the mud on his coat.

They were good days but he yearned for the high plateau and the few days in summer when he got to go back to it were not enough. But his Mother had been clear and he would not disobey.

The seasons turned, and the short summer became autumn and then winter and Cloud was trapped closer to the village by the snow drifts. He and his wolf still played in the snow each day but Cloud was struck by a sense of waiting. It was as if the Planet was holding its breath and he grew anxious with the anticipation that he could taste in the air. His wolf was almost fully grown and was a magnificent specimen of Nibel Wolf and despite their usual savage nature, Cloud had trained his to be well behaved. In the evenings, in front of the little stove fire that warmed their house, he liked nothing more than to curl up with his wolf, and run his fingers through the thick but soft coat, tracing out the patterns. The wolf liked that too and rumbled low to show his content.

There was one small darkness in the light that was Cloud's life. One of the village children, jealous that Cloud got to have a wolf had taken to baiting them and once, when the wolf cub was much younger, had separated it from Cloud and had hurt the young pup. Cloud had rescued the wolf, but despite the fact that he had done nothing wrong, the village had punished him. He still felt bitter about it now and the bitterness exploded into rage when he remembered the taunts the next day from the smug boy who had gotten away with hurting Cloud's friend without any punishment. "It's just an animal. A dumb beast that doesn't even have a name."

Cloud had shouted back, his limbs still stinging from the beating he'd gotten the day before and he and his wolf had vanished before the others could chase them down. Even hurting, Cloud was faster than the other children and he knew the ways around the village better than they ever would. But the taunts had hurt in a different way than the beating. Wolf wasn't a beast, he was Cloud's friend… but it was true that wolf didn't have a name. That day Cloud had tried to come up with a name for his friend, but every suggestion he made was met with laid back ears and a show of teeth.

There was one name he considered but it seemed too grand and much too powerful for the then adolescent wolf and he'd held back on the name, 'Fenrir' but when he looked into the yellow eyes of his friend he thought perhaps that it would be his name. In time.

As he grew up, his Mother's stories changed. She always asked him who he was to kill before he fell asleep but one day, one very surprising day the answer to the second question was different.

"Who do you kill Cloud?"

"Jenova."

"Very good Cloud. You kill Jenova. You _always_ kill Jenova, even if you have a choice, always Jenova. I don't know if I can save him Cloud, but if Jenova is dead, perhaps he won't need saving."

"Who is he?"

Cloud expected the answer to be the same as it always was: 'Not yet, my little Cloud, it's not yet time to know. I'll tell you when the path is clear.' But on that day, his Mother paused before answering and the words were different.

"His name is Sephiroth. He's a good boy, Cloud, just mislead but I don't know if I can save him."

Cloud smiled up as his Mother, repeating the name in his head 'Sephiroth'. "Don't worry," he whispered quietly, already falling asleep. "I'll save him."

Shocked blue eyes looked down at Cloud's sleeping form and he didn't feel it when his Mother reached out, pulling him up out from the covers to draw him close, rocking back and forth. "Oh Cloud," Raisa whispered, her voice sad and tears fell from her eyes as she held her son and she remembered another young man she could not comfort.

Work in the Mansion that day had been odd. It always was a bit odd in the days after a thundersnow, especially if she had been trapped in the Mansion as she had this time. But usually it wasn't this bad. It felt different somehow. She wasn't as attuned to the Planet as Cloud was but she could feel something. Surrounded by scientists Raisa did nothing to arouse curiosity. She could do nothing, especially as Hojo was in residence but even the scientists felt as if they were waiting. She didn't know why but there was an air of distraction at the Mansion and usually Raisa would have used that to take the opportunity to read more papers. This time, she kept strictly to her job, as if feeling a thousand eyes upon her.

She'd been resting in the kitchen with a blanket drawn around her when a noise had caused her to look up. What she'd seen… It was a boy… young man her mind corrected instantly but with the instant of correction, came the instant of recognition and she was drowned in an onslaught of memory.

Silver hair and green eyes. An impossibly long thin katana wielded with an ease that defied description. A fire ranging for eternity and the laugh of insanity. Black feathers and black wings and weird shambling figures robed in black. Motion, impossibly fast yet innocently slow. A woman stabbed through the back, smiling as she died. A scream, hatred echoing through time in that voice. Sickness and disease and more hair, carried on the wind, gently wafting, its silken length perfect. Another laugh, more controlled this time, saner but all the more frightening because of its control. And a woman with blue skin and glowing eyes, watching everything.

So many memories, all at once, and all screaming for her attention. Raisa whimpered softly, squeezing her eyes closed against the emotions that accompanied them. This was the boy… the man who had hurt her Cloud. The boy who had just appeared before her was the centre of it all. She hadn't agreed with her future self's suggestion to kill the boy who was Sephiroth, but now it didn't seem like such a bad idea. She should have known she wouldn't even be able to get close. Just seeing him incapacitated her. Raisa drew a shuddering breath, eyes still closed, but her conscious mind was screaming at her to regain control, to appear normal.

"Ma'am?" the voice was light, not yet broken with manhood.

"Ma'am?" The tentative call came again, and somehow Raisa could sense the movement towards her, a half step, hesitant but definitely taken.

Tentative? That made no sense. Sephiroth was not tentative. Nor was he hesitant.

That brought her memories crashing to a halt faster than a pail of frozen water.

Blue eyes blinked as they opened and Raisa saw for the first time the man who stood at the centre of it all with her Cloud. Green eyes met blue and for an instant there seemed to be recognition before everything shifted and once more took on the fog of the unknown. The man was not yet a man. He was young, on the verge of manhood but his features still had a roundness one associated with childhood and his voice was high and sweet. For a male, his hair was long, reaching down to his mid back but it was swept back and stayed in place and shone like the sheen on polished silver. His eyes were green, though they were almost impossibly wide and while Raisa wanted to see the innocent of childhood there, she knew that had been taken from him a long time ago. There was however, a sense of wonder about him and with a start she realised he was not meant to be here. Somehow, he had gotten out of the basement and was exploring. Her heart wept for his tiny rebellion and for the glow it gave him. He was not meant to be caged.

"Hello," she said, her voice dry from sleeping.

He didn't smile but he nodded his acknowledgement of her greeting and as if satisfied that she was not dead he continued to look around.

"This is the kitchen," Raisa answered the question that was never asked, suppressing a hint of fury that he did not even know such a simple thing like that. She could tell by the way his gaze lingered on everything. What boy grew up not knowing what a kitchen was?

"I know. I've seen…" He didn't finish the sentence and the blonde woman was thankful. She didn't want to know what he'd seen.

"I'm the Housekeeper, Raisa Strife," she introduced herself.

"Why were you sleeping?"

The question was innocent enough but it carried confusion. Why was she sleeping in the Kitchen? Why was she here? "Oh I don't live here," Raisa replied trying to keep her voice light. "I live in Nibelheim," she fervently hoped that he knew where he was. "And there was a thundersnow yesterday so I have to stay until that clears. Though all of that is unimportant because I bet you are hungry. Would you like something to eat, Sir?" For the rest of her life, Raisa wasn't sure what made her add the honourific but she did and in the long run that was for the best.

"I'm not a Sir," the not man replied, almost absently.

Raisa shook her head, rising and folding the blanket that had been around her haphazardly over one arm. "You are here, and are with Shinra?" she made the statement a question. A sharp nod was her reply. "I work for Shinra, but I'm only the Housekeeper which means if you are with Shinra, then you are a Sir to me," she finished with a smile. "Now, would you like something to eat? My son is always hungry." That wasn't quite true, Cloud hadn't yet reached that stage but she remembered the time so it wasn't that big a lie.

As she draped the half folded blanket over one simple chair instinct warred within her. Her memories screamed that this was the man responsible for everything but her present self held them back. This was not the man responsible. This boy was not yet a man and what did she ask Cloud every night? Who do you kill? Jenova. Even if she killed the boy now, it would not stop the future. She told her memories that and they quietened. Killing this boy now would just kill her Cloud because she could not see that Shinra would allow him to live.

"That would be nice," he finally replied and Raisa made sure to smile warmly at him, allowing no hint of her internal shouting match to show in her movements or gestures. Something must have shown though because he questioned her. "Why are you afraid?"

"Afraid, Sir?"

"You are afraid. I can sense it," the green eyes narrowed slightly and Raisa felt herself be weighed.

"Ah, you startled me," Raisa gives the answer, hoping it would cover the truth. It was itself the truth, just not the one he asked about. "What would you like in your sandwich, Sir?" She tried to change the subject.

The answer and the promise of food seemed to distract him enough and Raisa smiled gently. She wasn't meant to know he was a weapon, that he was not just a normal boy but she did, and the normalcy of the situation calmed her. The one winged angel could still be distracted, was still bound by such needs as food. He was, despite all the training Shinra had thrown at him, still human. At least for now.

"Anything."

Now that did not surprise her. Trained as a soldier, he would have been taught to eat whatever presented itself. "Is there anything you don't like?" Raisa pressed the question as she rummaged through the pantry, putting bread and various other items on to the middle table before moving to the absolutely huge fridge that dominated the place to pull out more items.

"No pickles," came the very soft reply, almost too softly to be heard but Raisa did and she was sure to turn back to the silver haired boy with a dazzling smile. No pickles made sense. To young taste buds they were probably too harsh so she made sure he could see her push the jar away.

That earned her the tiniest crease of one lip. If she hadn't been watching, she would have missed it but it was enough. "It's okay, my son doesn't like pickles either, Sir," she stage whispered.

"Your son?"

There was a moment there when Raisa didn't know what to do. This was the man who had fought Cloud, hurt Cloud, never giving him any peace and thus she didn't want to reveal her son to him. But this was the man who was central to it all, second only to Jenova and despite everything, the boy before her was still human.

"Ah, my son," Raisa replied, smiling again at the thought of her treasure. "He's younger than you and has blond hair and blue eyes. He takes after me that way, but he takes after his father in others." She began assembling the sandwich for the silver haired youth, careful to keep her hands where he could see them. For the life of her, Raisa didn't know if she was meant to know he was being trained as a S.O.L.D.I.E.R. or if at this point in time, Sephiroth was still just a random experiment but she deemed it safest to say nothing but act on the knowledge. If she was asked she would just say that she deemed it best given that the two of them were not known to each other.

For a few moments there was silence as Raisa continued making the sandwich and then it was done. Delftly she slipped it on to a plate she had placed in front of her earlier and slid it over the table towards the green eyed boy. He nodded his thanks and picked up one half of the sandwich biting into it and chewing thoughtfully. As the silence grew Raisa began packing away the ingredients but that didn't take her long and soon she was sitting at the table, watching as the young Sephiroth slowly ate the sandwich.

She almost laughed at herself when she realised something. She didn't know what to do.

Memories of the future came at her. So many possible ways she could change events, and now, sitting in the kitchen of the Shinra Mansion, with Sephiroth, she had no idea what she was meant to do.

"Your son," the silence was broken unexpectedly and Raisa looked over towards the young man again. He had finished half of the sandwich and was looking at her with curiously glowing eyes.

"Yes?" she prompted when it became obvious he was waiting for her to reply.

"What will he do when he is grown?"

A million questions entered Raisa's mind, screaming for attention, chasing each other around and around so noisily that she was surprised that the silver haired youth did not hear them. That single question revealed so much and her heart ached. But it ached because of the knowledge she had from the future and perhaps what had been considered Sephiroth's choice, was deemed that because most considered it a choice when in fact it should have been said to be Sephiroth's training. He knew no other way. And with one innocent question Raisa could see that. The monster of the future had been trained to be a S.O.L.D.I.E.R. and he simply knew no other way to live, could consider nothing else.

"I'm not sure," Raisa answered with a small smile. She didn't feel the way her eyes softened when she thought of Cloud and she didn't see the way green eyes watched the reaction fascinated and longing. "If he stays in Nibelheim, he will probably become a hunter," she continued…

"But you don't think he'll stay?" the observation interrupted her.

"No, I don't think he will. The world is too wide, and he wants to see it so much," Raisa said, quirking her lips in an odd smile. Her memories were not too clear but even if she changed the future, she knew her son's future was not in Nibelheim.

"I will be a Soldier," Sephiroth said suddenly. "That's what I was created for, and what I have been trained for."

She wanted to ask, oh she dearly wanted to ask if that was what he wanted, but such a question would reach Hojo too fast and on being a Soldier, there really was no choice for the green eyed boy. As he said himself, he had been created to be one, but there were soldiers and soldiers. He didn't have to be the soldier of the future her memories showed her. "Then Cloud and myself will be some of the people you protect," she said lightly, hinting towards other path a soldier could take.

"Cloud?"

"My son," Raisa said realising that she hadn't meant to tell the boy soldier her son's name. There was safety in the unknown but now he would be known. In the future, when Raisa remembered her time, there were some gestures she knew with absolute clarity why she had made them and then there were others that remained a mystery to her. What happened next was one of the deepest mysteries. Her mouth opened and the words fell out and maybe that moment changed everything… but maybe it didn't. Maybe it was just a gesture between two people trapped in a house. "I have a picture."

"May I see it?" The question was polite and Raisa, pre-occupied with her concern missed the note of hope in the voice.

"Of course, Sir," she had no choice but to reply. Denying him now would get her into trouble and she knew that young as he was he could probably spot it if she lied. Raisa reached under the apron she wore when working into her skirts to find the picture she carried everywhere. She glanced at it, smiling fondly at the sight of Cloud and his wolf playing in the water, the light catching them in such a way that they almost glowed before she slid it across the table.

She was pleased when Sephiroth put down the other half of the sandwich and wiped his fingers on the napkin before he reached for the picture, though the pleasure was tinged with sadness. She wasn't sure how old he was, but that gesture, that consideration was far too old for him when he could not be older than fourteen. No fourteen year old male should be that considerate!

But he was and from the look on the young face, he was fascinated. Raisa was fascinated when he smiled. Not the half crease of his lips she had seen earlier, but a full smile. It wasn't large but it warmed her heart when she realised it was genuine. It changed him. The cold exterior fell away almost instantly and he was warm. Even the glow from his green eyes changed somehow. It was infectious and Raisa felt herself smiling back at him.

"That is my son, Cloud and his wolf."

"Where are they?"

Typical question from someone militarily minded. Identify the personal, identify the location. In this case it didn't matter and from the hazy memories she had of Sephiroth's upbringing it might do him good to know that people could find happiness everywhere.

"On the mountain," Raisa replied, "Up near the plateau."

"It looks beautiful," Sephiroth said and Raisa was surprised at the way his fingers traced over the picture, almost caressing it gently.

"You should go up there sometime," she added, knowing full well that he was trapped and the only time he would even get close to the plateau was… was at time she'd rather not think about.

"I would like that," the green eyes changed slightly, taking on a thoughtful aspect and the blonde woman wondered what he could be thinking about. "Where will he go?"

"Sir?"

"Where will Cloud go when he leaves Nibelheim?"

"Oh," Raisa murmured in understanding. "I don't know… The world is so large. He'll…" She chuckled. "Actually I think he will join Shinra when he's old enough," she added, drawing from the memories of what had been. Cloud would never join Shinra, not in this world, not while she lived. The strength of her conviction seared into her mind.

"I'll look forward to meeting him," Sephiroth said, putting down the picture and picking up the other half of the sandwich and bitting into it.

"Oh, Sir?"

"I will be S.O.L.D.I.E.R.," the silver haired teen repeated and while he did not place any particular stress on the word 'soldier' Raisa could feel the letters spelt out in the acronym her future self had educated her about, stressing how important it was for the future.

"Like the army?" that seemed a safe enough thing to say for a mountain woman who was meant to have no idea about anything Shinra was doing and perhaps it would clarify the situation.

"Yes, like the army," Sephiroth replied, leaving out further details in an admiral show of discretion as he continued to eat the sandwich.

"Woman!"

The call startled them both and Raisa looked towards the doorway to see one of the Turks standing there, glaring at her. Behind her Sephiroth continued to eat the sandwich, downing the last bite with an exaggerated gulp as one hand swept over the table, collecting the picture and pushing it into his pocket. The appearance of the Turk was information enough for him to know that Hojo had not told them about his instructions to his creation and inwardly Sephiroth rolled his eyes. Hiding orders for the sake of hiding orders… so inefficient. He would be in charge soon and things would change. He would see to that.

"Did you want something?" He asked coming around the table and walking through the kitchen to stand equal to the Turk, looking straight into his eyes. At fourteen he was as tall as a full grown man and probably still not at his adult height. He knew how to use that to his advantage.

"No," the Turk replied, looking back and forth between Sephiroth and the blonde woman he knew was the housekeeper. This was the kitchen, the housekeeper was meant to be here… but Sephiroth… He was meant to be in the basement.

"Then you will accompany me back to the Professor," the silver haired teenager ordered, stepping around the Turk and walking back towards the Basement stairs without looking back.

"Ma'am," the Turk said by way of parting to Raisa, who was standing watching the entire scene with wide blue eyes, before disappearing into the darkened corridor.

* * *

Raisa never knew what happened to Sephiroth after he left her to return to the basement of the Mansion. If she had, it might have given her hope for the future.

Hojo was waiting for the young man and the instant he appeared the questions began. The Turks might have declared the woman safe, he was not so … casual with his greatest creation but he was not above using that creation to gather information.

"Well?" The question was snapped.

"She is the Housekeeper," Sephiroth replied with practiced military bearing.

"What did she say?" Hojo asked further, certain he could catch the woman by sending a child.

Sephiroth repeated the conversation he had had with Raisa verbatim. It was part of his training to memorise conversations, tactics… memorise life so that he could go through it. Even as he repeated her words he analysed them. He knew Hojo's suspicions but he also knew that Hojo liked having the Mansion cleaned. There was nothing in her words that sounded off. They were all normal and surely if she was an agent she'd have tried something to influence him.

"Bah! Is the woman retarded to go with illiterate?" Hojo eventually barked and Sephiroth hid a smile. As he suspected, there was nothing in what she had said to convict her and while her reactions had been odd at a few points, they were not that unusual… and she had smelt like… The young man wasn't sure exactly what she had smelt like, but he liked it. It had been… comforting though that was a word he was never allowed to use. He knew what he was meant to be, what he was meant to need, and comfort and companionship were not allowed.

Sephiroth stood there, waiting for Hojo to finish. "Give me it," the white coated scientist demanded eventually.

"Sir?"

"Give me the picture."

Almost reluctantly Sephiroth brought the photograph out of one pocket and handed it over. It was somehow abhorrent to see Hojo with that picture and the black beady eyes traced over the image, seeing it but not really seeing it. "Bah," came another derision and the picture was flicked on to the table. Sephiroth couldn't help himself and reached out to pick it up.

"What are you doing?" Hojo's voice was almost a shriek, as if he could detect some unwanted emotion in his creation, some spark of life.

"I thought I would keep it," Sephiroth said, using the coldest, most perfect voice he could muster. "A token of my first successful mission," he added the excuse, hoping that it would pacify the man who had created him, raised him, experimented on him and made him into a S.O.L.D.I.E.R. for Shinra.

"There will be a thousand such tokens," Hojo spat.

"But only one first mission," the green eyed teenager replied, not even knowing why he was arguing but wanting that picture to remain with him. There was something infinitely peaceful about it and from the first moment he had seen it, it called to him. The boy was not looking at the camera, rather his gaze was on the wolf, and it was so tender… it was a comfort, it was peaceful and the screaming in his mind had been quelled when he looked upon the image. It had been a relief so profound that he had almost fallen in front of the woman but he had remained composed, just as he had to remain composed here. Hojo could never know the effect this image had… If he did… Sephiroth didn't want to think what that would mean. The boy would dead… if he was lucky. If not he would be locked in the lab, screaming and that was not something Sephiroth wanted for him, even though he'd never met the boy.

He had been raised to know his feelings, to identify where each emotion came from and what was causing them, and then to control them. And on the trip down from the kitchen back to the basement he had thought about it, he had tried to work out where the feelings were coming from bit it eluded him and just for the moment, Sephiroth didn't care. It felt good and that was enough.

"Keep it if it makes you happy," Hojo spat before he stormed out, unhappy that he had nothing on the woman. There was something there… he could feel it and usually he'd have just taken her and pulled and poked and prodded until he found out what it was, but with Hollander's brats proving to be viable his influence, even in this backwater, just didn't extend that far.

Still, the woman was a matter of passing interest. Soon, in a month or so, he'd be able to show Shinra why his creation was the better. Just as soon as the Wutai acted on the insult they had been given. Oh that would be a glorious day when his creation was unleashed upon the world… But before that…

It still had a willful streak. But he would break it. That would take just a little bit more time and he had that time.

* * *

Two months after Raisa met Sephiroth, Shinra cleared out of the Mansion. That had happened before, they had been gone for months at a time in the past and it meant nothing to the villagers. It was permanent this time. Raisa knew that and she'd known it the instant one of the Turks had come to see her during work. They were polite, thanking her for her work before and giving her quite a generous severance package. But she was informed that once the scientist left, she was to close up the Mansion and that was that.

She accepted it. Of course she accepted it, thanking the Turk for the years of work she had done for them. To them it was menial but to her it was survival. She had saved, in all the years she had worked for them she now had quite a nest egg put away and if she was a simple mountain woman, then, assuming she re-married, she'd be quite comfortable for the rest of her life. That was not her intention and they would not know that until it was too late.

And then when Shinra had left she packed up the Mansion as if they were just leaving for a few months and she didn't attend to it for a month, just in case they had left watchers. Shinra never had before but they had never left permanently before either.

Somehow, when dealing with the rest of the village, Raisa accidentally forgot to mention to them that Shinra had left. Instead she explained her month absence from work as a holiday and no one knew anything more. Life went on as normal.

Shinra had left through the winter and spring was slowly warming the mountain community when Raisa returned to the Mansion. She made sure to complain that night about the amount of dust and debris she had to clean up and the villagers laughed. Cloud grinned at her and everything was okay.

Each day Raisa went back to the Mansion and each day she searched a little further. Her future self had learned many things, but not everything. Some of the secrets they needed were only in this Mansion and while those in the Lifestream had tried to help and had explained, as best as they could, were the information was likely to be hidden, to Raisa it sometimes felt like she was looking for a needle in a haystack… And time was running out. She felt that more intensely than she had ever felt that before. The hands of fate were turning.

Cloud continued obey, though he had managed to get to the high plateau twice in the early spring, with her permission since the village needed the herbs he could bring back. His wolf had run beside him, almost fully grown and terrifyingly huge to those who did not know the golden eyed animal's gentle nature.

Some nights, Raisa watched her son sleeping and she could almost hear the tick of a clock. It was frightening to know that so much rested upon her but she would do whatever it took, find whatever was needed and in the days after such a feeling she went to the Mansion especially early and searched especially hard.

The first thing she found, she almost didn't know what to do with it. It was a small vial, a stoppered test tube, labelled in scrawly hand writing she recognised as Hojo's. "Ancient Sample," said the label and Raisa had frowned at it before slipping the vial into one pocket. She knew what it should be, but this was Hojo… why would he have left that?

The next day she found a stack of notes hidden under a loose floor board under one of the beds. It was not Hojo's room. In all the years Raisa had been working in the Mansion, Hojo had never used that room so she took the notes to be genuine and began to read. It was not information she needed but it chilled her to the core, each detail of the experiments that had been run on Specimen S… Specimen Sephiroth. No child should have to undergo that. But it contained the truth, laid out in clear text, who his birth mother was, who his birth father was, and what exactly the entity Jenova was and how she was meant to interact with Hojo's creation. It was the clearest explanation of what they were trying to do, all written on Shinra watermarked paper.

Resolutely she packed the documents away, knowing the information was both important and useless. It would be important for the future, but it was useless for her now. It was not the information she sought and she began to think that the information was not here. Yet she knew it had to be. Which meant it had to be in the basement… the one place she had not yet been able to find.

And so she began looking for the basement entry with a vengeance, poking this, prodding that, pulling this and that, focusing especially on the areas that had been denied to her to clean. Not that there had been many… Any area she had not been allowed to clean were the first checked and all she found there was evidence of the Turks and a couple of porno mags. Boys would be boys, no matter what age they were.

A month passed, then two, and spring was fully upon them. The trees were fully green and the leaves rustled in the wind and Cloud was begging permission to return to the high plateau while the weather held. She gave reluctantly gave permission, knowing that even if she didn't, Cloud was just as likely to go slopes below the high plateau and thus could honestly answer her at night that he had not been where he was not allowed. Though she did set one stipulation on him. He was not to go near the reactor, ever. Cloud laughed and she knew he would obey.

And then, as spring turned into summer, she found it, the entrance to the Basement and shivering she descended the rickety stairs. That day, she did not look around much, merely confirmed that she had found the right place and what rooms it contained. It was enough, and she was tired by the time she emerged from the mansion, back into the thin light of the highland summer.

The sun was good on her skin but not matter its warmth she shivered as she made her way back into the village. Somehow, time had caught up with her but she didn't yet know what that meant.

The instant Raisa got to the Inn, she knew. The whole village had gathered and were all jostling to look at the paper. In the winter, it wasn't unusual for Nibelheim to not receive news from the outside world for the entire season. But this news, Shinra had made sure to transport to the world. This news suited them, and memories not her own arose, telling her what was to come. It was simple really, and she knew, the moment she saw the headline, time was up.

"WAR WITH WUTAI."

The watcher had awoken.

* * *

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 5  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

"WAR WITH WUTAI."

By themselves the words meant nothing but they explained everything. That night, after listening to the radio with the rest of the village, Raisa returned to her house. Prefunctionarily she prepared dinner and tucked Cloud into bed.

And then she went and sat in her chair and was quiet for a very long time.

She had been expecting this. She remembered this and it was exactly the same as her memories. Shinra had expended a lot of energy in ensuring that the world knew that they were at war, and in painting Wutai as being the perpetrators. Raisa had no doubt that it was Wutai who had made the initial declaration of war. They would have been given no choice.

That was hardly a concern. What mattered now was this would be the point at which she had to act. The war had lasted for a few years, so she felt safe in thinking that it would last at least that long here but that left her a year, two at the most in which to act.

The watcher needed to be strong if it was to be viable.

Slowly Raisa breathed in and out, closing her eyes and allowing herself to fall into a light trance. Her tasks now were easy. Firstly, she had to find the information. Then she had to verify that it was correct. Once she knew that, once she could prove it, then she could act.

The wolf whined and padded over to her, laying its head in her lap and Raisa smiled down at it, automatically raising her hands to scratch at the wolf's ears. It growled, low in its throat, the sound appreciative rather than challenging. In the basement there was one more thing that might help but her memories were not clear on it… Which meant her memories were not her own but came from the Lifestream.

A man with pale skin, red eyes and black hair, dressed all in red. A man who knew Sephiroth's birth mother, who had stood beside her Cloud, who was… Raisa paused as the memories, green tinged and laced with Lifestream, swirled around her. She knew, without knowing how she knew, that he would not be an easy man to work with. He had ideas, opinions and he tended to follow them, regardless of circumstance. He had been a Turk though events had left him with no lingering loyalty to Shinra. Raisa snorted lightly at that. In the end, most Turks had no loyalty to Shinra, they just had no other place to go. But would this man help or hinder her? Would he agree with her plan or think it merely reckless?

She thought about that, long into the night before Raisa laughed at herself. It didn't matter. In the pursuit of a changed future, she would commit murder if necessary but she would not, could not murder those who had helped. Regardless of what happened, she had to wake that man because he would not be safe if she left him there during the first part of her plan. And there really was no reason why the first part of her plan would fail, so she had to wake him up. The nebulous idea that had driven her future self back in time had incubated, growing, adjusting and now was a full plan, lodged in her mind with the steps laid out before her like stepping stones on a path. She would follow them, and she would hope that the weight of them was enough to change the future.

And Raisa would pray that those who died would forgive her, for she could see no other way.

* * *

Despite her hopes, it still took Raisa almost two years to find the information she required. In that time, of course the little village of Nibelhiem noticed that Shinra was no longer in the Mansion. Raisa shrugged off the accusative glares and explained her visits to the Mansion as terms of her employment. Shinra had left, but she was tasked with keeping the place ready in case they needed to return. She altered her visit habits though allowing herself to be seen entering the Mansion once a week and allowing herself to be seen going with Cloud to the mountains at other times.

It was difficult on Cloud and Raisa did as much as she could to help him, but often now she had to spend the night in the Mansion so that she could continue searching so that the villagers would not see her coming and going to a place they now knew she should not be. She explained as much as she could to him and he seemed to understand but he was nine… How much did a nine year old really understand? To help him, so that he had some company, she'd even tried asking Zangan to give him some lessons. The old Master had shaken his head, not in an unkind way but in a way that the reply was not to be questioned. "I'm not the one to teach him," the man had stated before walking off, leaving Raisa more confused than ever. There was nothing she could do about that and so she made a deal with Cloud. He could go to the highest peaks but only if he brought back herbs for the village.

The deal was too easy, she knew but it would keep him happy and it did. But there were times when he missed his Mother. The explanation that this was necessary for the future was cold at night when his Mother was not there to tuck him in. But Cloud never showed his tears. He worked harder instead, trained more. He became as strong as the bovines, the very rare mountain cattle that roamed the hills and there were days when he was running that he thought he could fly. And he became as nimble and as fast as the wolf in leaping and turning, in running over the rough ground of the mountain. No one, not even Tifa, could keep up with him and so he explored everywhere on the mountain. He knew the places the dragons nested, he knew where the wolf packs roamed, he knew where the best patches of herbs grew and where the planet sang so clearly that it almost broke his heart.

He went back to that spot, high in the mountains, many times. The seclusion comforted him and whispering words he could hear from the mako fountain sang to him and Cloud laughed playing with his wolf in the thin mountain sunlight, watched over by the planet.

Outside of Nibelheim the war raged and the legend of S.O.L.D.I.E.R.s grew. They were Shinra's elite; the best of the best, faster and stronger than a normal human and able to take on monsters or the hordes of Wutai seemingly by themselves. And they were lead by three legends.

Genesis of the Red Blade and the endless quotations of Loveless. His attacks were lightning fast and he was like the wind, a ghost, never where you expected him to be on the battlefield. But he could still melee with the best of them.

Angeal, the solid older brother. The man who could stand and deliver and fight, and fight and fight, until all around him was still. He was someone everyone could rely upon and unlike Genesis he was approachable.

And finally Sephiroth. The war god. The man who could be both the ghost of speed and the avatar of destruction. A man who could walk out of battle without a single hair out of place, who could survey the plans of the enemy with a single glance and destroy them. Shinra's finest creation.

Raisa had read the news, she had heard it on the radio. Shinra were careful to portray their Generals as akin to gods but she could hear more than they wanted the public to know. Wutai was not falling easily. They were fighting harder and harder and their strikes were becoming more desperate. Environmental terrorists aided them, striking deep into Shinra territory and the war seemed that it would continue to drag for years. It wouldn't. She knew that, but it would last a few more years. The aftermath it would leave Wutai so crippled that they could not fight, could not watch and she needed to prevent that.

It was late in the summer, just after Cloud's birthday when she accompanied him up to the high plateau. She wanted to explain things, as much as she could and that was the only place she knew she could guarantee privacy. The Mansion was meant to be secure but it would be just her luck that a bug was still active. And her house should have been secure but she knew what Nibelhiem was like, and she knew just how easy it was to 'accidentally' overhear something. The village grape vine thrived on such over heard conversations. The only safe place was in the middle of no where… Not that Cloud would understand much of what she was going to explain but she had to try because when the time came to move, she would not have the time to explain it then.

That day on the high plateau with Cloud's wolf gambolling around them and a small picnic she had packed spread out on the blanket she explained. Raisa told Cloud of the future that would have been. She told Cloud of the Generals, Genesis and Angeal and the roles they would play. She told him of his friend, Zack and the sacrifice he would make. She told him of the red man who was under the mansion, of all the sides of Avalanche and the friends he would make. And she told Cloud of the woman Aerith and how much she loved the world. She warned him about Shinra, about Hojo and about all the monsters that lurked in the dark. She told him of Jenova, making the alien more than just a name. She told Cloud of Sephiroth and how he would fall. Her son didn't worship the Shinra General this time. He had known Sephiroth's name before it even appeared in the randomly delivered paper and he had known of his strength and his deeds. Raisa had been unable to resist telling her son some things when he begged her for more information about the one winged angel but his eyes darkened when he heard the future and his face frowned.

But most importantly, she told him how she wanted to change it all.

For a long time after she finished speaking Cloud just looked at her, and then he closed his eyes and Raisa felt her heart contract. He might only be ten years old, but he was hers and she needed him to trust her. This was all for him. All the time alone, everything she had done, she had done it for him. She would do it for him.

When he opened his eyes again, his gaze was different. She wasn't sure how but it left her worried and they stared at each other, neither talking until Cloud cleared his throat a little. "So… what happens now?"

Raisa sagged with relief, sending a million prayers of thanks to the planet. He believed her. The crazy story with nothing but her word… he believed her!

Then a more rational part of her mind intruded. Of course he believed her. He was her son. What child did not believe their parents? At least in youth. It would be up to her to prove to him that her words were true.

It would be up to her to prove to the world that her words were true. His trusting eyes made what she had to ask now all the more difficult. She thought it would work. In theory it should be relatively easy but this would be the first time she attempted it and she had read the notes left behind by Shinra. She knew how many times they failed. She wanted to enhance something. Not Cloud, she would not risk him and she could not risk herself. What point was there in enhancing herself? No, that left only one living creature she could attempt on and if she failed… Cloud would rightfully hate her forever.

"Cloud," Raisa began after gathering her courage.

"Hmm?" He smiled up at her.

She gulped. This bit was harder than just explaining. "I'm going to need to test it."

"Test what?"

Raisa almost laughed. Oh her Cloud. He had understood but he hadn't yet grasped everything. It didn't matter. She was actually prouder this way. He shouldn't have to understand the cesspool that was politics and adult life. Not yet. Not while he was still her little boy. "I have stayed in Nibelheim because I needed to learn things. And one of those things was the process to enhance someone. But I will need to prove that I know how to do it. That means I need to test it."

"On me?"

"No!" Though Cloud's conclusion was the obvious answer it was not something she would allow. She had read the notes, she knew what happened to someone if you enhanced them while they were a child… How Sephiroth had survived was still a mystery to her. No… how he had survived was easy, how he had grown up, that was a mystery and the amount of stimulants and growth hormones Shinra must have used on him so that their General became a man. The thought was still staggering.

Enhancement convinced the body that it wanted to be at its peak. The cells all strived to be there and once they reached what they knew were their peak, then they stayed there, becoming stronger and stronger until one became superhuman. If you enhanced a child, someone who had not yet started puberty then the body would be stuck in childhood because without the hormones and the changes triggered at puberty, then that's where the body thought its peak was. If you enhanced someone in puberty, then the body would push to finish as soon as possible, providing you went slow enough. If you didn't, they'd be trapped in some sort of half body, amazingly strong, but never completely mature, at least in their body. That's why Shinra was choosing young men to make into S.O.L.D.I.E.R.s. They would be preserved in their mature body, and if by some chance they were still in the tail end of puberty, then Shinra's process was slow enough that their body would have the time to rush them through it.

And all of that meant was that she would not, could not enhance Cloud. "No Cloud, not you."

His face fell and Raisa knew she had to give a reason. Surprisingly, she decided to go with the truth. "If I enhance you now," she said, acting as if the process was not untested and she deliberately suppressed the memory of reading how many 'tests' Shinra went through to perfect their methodology, "you would be stuck as you are. Always a child. So no Cloud, not until you are older."

"Then…" he frowned and she was hard pressed not to scoop him into her arms at the sheer cuteness of his expression. "Then who?"

That was the question. Who could she enhance? The answer was easy and she'd known since this began who she would be using as a test subject. Really from the day the wolf came home with Cloud she knew what its purpose was. "Wolf."

"Wolf?"

"I'll make him worthy of the name Fenrir."

For an instant Raisa thought Cloud would object and she did not relish the prospect of enforcing parental authority and forcing him to allow wolf to be her test subject for enhancement. That would not end well, even if everything went as it was supposed to… and the blonde woman didn't even want to think what it would be like if the process failed. She managed not to shudder, but it was a close thing. And then Cloud didn't say no, he said something worse, his blue eyes wide with innocence.

"I think we should let wolf decide."

Oh no… Oh no, oh no, oh no. Let the wolf decide? Raisa already knew how that would turn out. There was no way, absolutely _no way_ she could convince the wolf to come with her to the Mansion. The animal would take one sniff of the place and quite rightly run. But she couldn't tell Cloud that and she couldn't let him think she wouldn't agree to this or he'd see it as coercion. And with her son believing her, at least on most of her story, this was not the time she wanted to risk his anger. She needed him. By the planet she _needed_ him. "All right," she heard herself agree in the way that had happened a few times before when she spoke without really knowing what was said. "But I'm going to need you to come with me, so that you can explain to wolf what everything is and why he shouldn't be afraid," she added with a smile.

Seriously Cloud nodded at her, before reaching out to embrace his wolf who had come trotting back at the sound of his 'name'. The great animal licked Cloud in greeting and politely sniffed at Raisa's hand. She smiled at the wolf truly noticing for the first time how large the animal had gotten. Cloud was not that small but wolf easily stood even with his shoulder and suddenly Raisa had the insane image of Cloud riding his wolf high into the mountains to hide from her.

"We should go," his small voice broke into her thoughts.

"Cloud?" Raisa asked, looking at her son. His face was twisted in light concentration as he looked up to the mountain.

"There's a storm coming," he said softly.

"Thundersnow?"

"No, just a storm," he said, looking back at her with a smile. "But we should go now."

Raisa nodded her agreement. Even a storm on the mountain could be deadly and it was best to avoid it. Deftly she began packing up the few things they had brought for the picnic, feeding the few scraps to the wolf before she folded up the linen and tucked them back into her apron before rising to follow Cloud back down the mountain.

* * *

They waited a few days after that. Cloud understood now a bit of why she had been forced to leave him alone for so long and so he appreciated the days she spent with him. Despite searching for the last two years for the last bits of information she needed, she had spent more time with Cloud since Shinra had left than she had when she was working.

She'd come to know her boy, know his quirks and his likes, know him and his wolf. She had loved every minute of it but she knew that it would come to an end soon. The instant the war had started she knew she was on borrowed time. But it only made the time all the more precious. Once she enhanced the wolf they would have to leave. The risk of the villagers seeing was simply too high.

And she would not allow herself to think that she could fail.

The Raisa of the future had known in a vague way what was involved in enhancement. Those in the Lifestream had tried to explain to her but such precise information was not her own and much had been lost in the transfer leaving Raisa to search for the missing pieces. That's why she knew when she read the notes of the scientists what was right and what was mere speculation. Over the years she had filled in the blanks in her mind, building up the instructions and the dosages and everything else required to enhance a human. It had been laborious. Shinra just didn't leave out step by step instructions and even once she found the basement, she'd had to sift her way through copious amounts of text finding the truth.

A lot of that text dealt with Sephiroth and Jenova and had made them seem akin to gods. But as she'd read further, delved deeper she'd begun to notice discrepancies. Texts which were quoted by other papers as saying one thing, didn't actually say that at all! They said the complete opposite or something equally confusing. At first, there was no rhyme or reason to the discrepancies but then she started marking them before sorting the hand written notes into piles according to penmanship. Most of the lies came from one hand. And when she checked further, the other writers had perpetuated the mistake by referring to the initial lie. They had never gone back to check the original text.

Raisa had done the same with the printed text, as much as she was able to. It was difficult to determine author on some of those random pages but the trend seemed to continue.

The scrawl that originated the lies belonged to one man and her memories told her who it was before she even checked. But the blonde woman confirmed it anyway, just to be sure, and sure enough the hand was Hojo's. It just strengthened her resolve and she took samples, bits of some of the obvious lies and bits of the more subtle insidious lies, those that you really had to be concentrating to see. She never planned on calling Hojo a liar to his face. That would be most unwise. But she never knew when something could cause a deviation from what she wanted and it always paid to be prepared. If nothing else having the papers would prove her authenticity.

In between the lies she gleaned the information she required. A step here, a dosage there. It was spread out and while it was dangerous, during the years of her search Raisa kept her own notes. She'd had too, to sort out the lies but now she kept them to document the process.

Those notes where what she referred to now. It was not pages and pages of text. Enhancement was actually sickenly easy. Most of Shinra's Reactor workers were at least slightly enhanced… the very first ones anyway, those who were still alive. It really just involved Mako. For the best results, you needed a stabilising agent, something that allowed the body to better interact with Mako. All creatures of the Planet could interact with Mako and the Lifestream but that interaction naturally occurred when they were dead. Living and interacting with Mako was dangerous and that's why you needed the stabilising agent. Raisa knew that Shinra used Jenova. Originally they used the creature under the mistaken belief that she was an Ancient, but Hojo's notes had been clear and he hadn't been lying. They knew she wasn't an Ancient. They'd know that for a long time. At least Hojo had. She was something else. She was the calamity. And she was the reason the Ancients were all but extinct.

Raisa _had_ samples of Jenova… many, many samples had been left behind in the basement. But she had a sample of something else and as far as she was able to verify, it was genuine. She would use that.

Cloud had helped her get the wolf into the Mansion and had calmed his companion on the trip down to the Basement, whispering into the animal's ear all sorts of reassurances. It seemed to help, though the wolf was curious about the smells and earlier, in the upper levels of the Mansion had seemed to want to investigate. Down here his ears were laid back and his steps were tentative. Raisa didn't blame the wolf. She had felt… still felt that way herself about the Basement, but she was familiar with it. She'd cleaned the stench of Mako and blood away as best she could but it still permeated everything.

The wolf was on one of the examination tables and Cloud was sitting beside it, petting the animal gently, running his hands through the thick fur. Raisa had the few pages of her instructional notes spread out on the desk and they were the only papers there. It had been a risk, but she had cleaned everything away earlier, trusting that Shinra would not return, or that if they did, her claim of illiteracy would hold the execution. She'd had to clean to sort out the mess and the lies and to know what she had read and what she hadn't read. The vial she had found so long ago was sitting there as well, next to a clean syringe and several large beakers filled with various liquids. One had saline solution, one distilled water and the last glowed slightly, liquid Mako.

Up close, the wolf was a magnificent specimen. His coat was that odd brown grey that was found on Nibel wolves and he had ripples, almost blond lines of fur running through the others, defining the pieces of his body. They ran down from his eyebrows running down the wolf's neck and over his chest to disappear between the forelegs. Others ran over his haunches and down over his belly to disappear beneath him. And tufts of darker blond hair were on the tips of his ears. His claws were long and well formed and his teeth were gleaming white and sharp. Raisa knew, just by looking at him, at his size and his strength that if wolf had not been running with her son, this wolf would have been a pack leader by now. The way his golden eyes just watched her, taking in every movement were too serious to be anything but a pack leader. Yet Cloud was his pack and his leader and the wolf apparently saw nothing wrong with that.

It would have been best if the wolf was restrained but while Cloud had managed to get the animal into the Mansion, Raisa knew wolf would never accept chains. Either this would work and he would sleep or otherwise be placid during the enhancement, or she and Cloud would find themselves facing a large, enraged animal in what was a very confined space.

"Is Wolf ready?" Raisa asked, tapping the syringe. The best enhancement results would require multiple injections, spaced out over a year. The body and mind needed time to accustom themselves to the alterations and enhancement injections too close together left a strong body with a mind unable to accept and access its power… if the Mako didn't poison the mind entirely. Shinra had three levels in their S.O.L.D.I.E.R.s and while Raisa didn't know the exact boundaries between them all, she thought the levels were indicative of the different levels of enhancement. This one injection would make wolf far more than his wild brethren, would give him gently glowing golden eyes and the ability to heal flesh wounds as if they were nothing but there would be things that could be improved by further enhancement. With this one injection, if wolf broke a bone, which would be harder than normal, it would heal quickly, over the course of a week, not over the course of an hour. If she had the chance to give him more injections, that healing time would be reduced. But this one injection would be enough to verify that she could do what she claimed. That was all she was looking for now.

"I think so," Cloud said, smiling back at her and wolf just laid his head down on his fore legs, his golden eyes unblinking as he watched her.

"All right. Then let us begin," Raisa said taking a deep breath. "I'm going to inject wolf with this," she began explaining, gesturing towards the syringe. "It's quite a simple mix, but Shinra makes it seem far more difficult than it is. It's salt, water, Mako and a stabilising agent. Shinra use Jenova," Raisa continued and was well pleased when Cloud stiffened at the name but she allowed herself no reaction. "I'm using something else, something a lot more natural. I hope that makes the process easier."

"Easier?"

"Stablier. Most S.O.L.D.I.E.R.s are injected with Mako and Jenova, and they are given a 'dead' sample of Jenova, though I think the Firsts might have live Jenova cells. The Mako enhances their bodies, the Jenova cells enhance their minds, giving them what they call a sixth sense. But it's alien and it has its own agenda. Even if nothing has happened yet, I _know_ it will. I explained to you what is going to happen if nothing changes. That's why I'm going to use a sample from an Ancient, a Cetra. They worked with the Planet, helping it, interpreting its cries and they fought Jenova. Cetra's lived in harmony with the Planet, so the sixth sense that they give, the enhancement to the mind should give a greater connection to the Planet."

Cloud nodded. He didn't understand everything but he understood enough of it. Copying from Shinra, his Mother had developed the same technique to make living beings stronger, but her technique should also give them a greater understanding and ability to commune with the planet. He smiled to himself. There were times, up on the high plateau, near the Mako fountain when he could almost hear the planet. Perhaps it was just fanciful wishing but something make him feel secure there which was one of the reasons he liked going so high up the mountain.

He knew his mum didn't think he understood what she was doing, trying to change the future, but he knew more than she thought he did. He could _feel_ the truth of her words. The feeling was odd… and it wasn't something he could really describe. He could tell when someone was lying, even if they thought what they were saying was the truth. And he could tell when someone was telling the truth. When his Mum had explained everything, she had been telling the truth, both what she believed to be the truth and the actual truth. He wouldn't say the planet confirmed her words, but it had whispered beneath his hearing, soothing his surprise and confirming even the difficult parts of her tale. Cloud didn't understand anything of the science but he understood the situation. Unless something was changed, then the future would be painful, both for him and the Planet. The changes his Mother wanted to put in place would be bloody, but at least there would be a future beyond the blood. He couldn't say that he could hear the planet, but he could sometimes feel it, or he thought he could. It was desperate. It wanted the change his Mother represented and Cloud was both humbled and proud of his Mum. He didn't know everything, but he knew enough.

That's why he had done his best to convince Wolf that this was something that needed to be done, though now that he was here, so deep underground, he was unsure. Cloud had thought that underground, surrounded by earth, he would be able to feel the Planet better, and so he would be able to keep Wolf calm. But he couldn't feel the planet at all. The further they had gotten into the Mansion the more distant the feeling of the Planet had become, until now he couldn't even feel a whisper. It felt… It felt wrong and Cloud could tell that wolf had picked up on his nerves. It was one of the reasons he was petting wolf so extensively. They had no choice now and had to continue.

He did not _like_ this place at all. The rooms felt used. The presence of people was strong here, so the rooms should be warm. But they were cold. It was as if the people here had been impersonal and only here because they had to be. They left only cold emotions layered in the room. The large cylinder in the corner did not so much as occupy space as it brooded in the room. It was subtle but it was the focus of so much here and Cloud could not imagine what its purpose was. Resolutely he turned his eyes from it before nodding to his Mother, indicating that he was ready, that wolf was ready in as much as they could be.

"I'll be as gentle as I can," Raisa said, stepping up to wolf and Cloud when she saw her son's acknowledgement to continue. She allowed wolf to sniff at the syringe and he didn't seem too fussed about the smell which was comforting though she knew it would not like the prick of the needle or the liquid inside. _Please let him remain calm,_ Raisa sent up a silent prayer but whether she was referring to Cloud or his wolf, she did not know.

Firmly she grasped one of wolf's forelegs, pulling it towards her slightly and deftly she shaved a small patch of fur away. The mix could be injected either intravenously or intramuscularly but it was better intravenously so she would try that first. She tried not to gulp when wolf flashed sharp teeth at her. He did not like the bare patch on his leg but Raisa used her fingers to sooth the skin, feeling for a vein. Now came the really difficult bit. Medicine in Nibelheim involved crushing herbs and drinking them with copious amounts of beer or the spirit they made from freezing lesser quality wine and skimming off what did not freeze. What did she know about needles and how to use them?

As gently as she could Raisa pushed the needle into Wolf's leg. The animal whined but held still under Cloud's soothing touch but she could feel the stiff muscles. There was more resistance than she thought there would be as she slowly depressed the plunger but eventually all the glowing liquid was injected into wolf.

It was a surprise when wolf began to twitch but thankfully she had removed the needle. Having it broken in his leg would not have been good. Cloud slipped off the table, but kept his hands on wolf, trying to comfort the animal as he continued to twitch. The wolf's yellow eyes opened and fixed on Raisa and she shuddered. She could see the accusation there, the pain but wolf made no sound. Raisa breathed a sigh of relief. So far, so good but there was a long night ahead of them.

Cloud didn't know what was wrong. Everything seemed to be going okay. His mum had injected wolf and his friend was lying still being patted. Then everything began to hurt. It wasn't the pain of sitting in the one place for too long. It was painful everywhere and Cloud frowned, gritting his teeth against the sensation. He didn't want to disturb wolf when his friend was going through so much more. His mum had explained it, but Cloud had seen her doubt. He knew this wasn't as safe as she wanted him to believe. He'd still allowed it though because it felt right.

But this didn't feel right. This pain and with a groan Cloud curled into himself, suppressing his tears.

"Cloud!" His mother cried out, rushing to him. She had been resting in the chair at the desk, watching over them both but when he moved, she moved. He was ten, too big to be picked up but Raisa did it anyway, trying to get Cloud to uncurl so that she could see what was wrong. It didn't make sense! He had been fine earlier and there was nothing left in the basement which should be affecting him. So why was he in pain?

"Mum," he croaked and Raisa's eyes widened when she looked into her son's blue eyes. They were shot through with red and from the tone of his voice she could feel he was in agony.

"Cloud, no!" she made the denial, not even sure what she was trying to deny as she lifted her boy to the desk, sweeping her notes aside to lay him there. She put one hand on his forehead, testing for fever and found that he was burning. What was going on? "Cloud, stay with me. Focus on my voice."

For a moment that seemed to work and Cloud looked up at her, his eyes visibly gripping her and the feeling of his presence flared around her. Then another sound intruded and two sets of blue eyes opened wide at what it meant.

Raisa didn't even think as she threw herself over Cloud. It was instinctual and she felt relieved even as she screamed in pain. Long gashes were opened down her back and side as the wolf lunged at her, his claws digging through her clothes and into her skin to draw blood.

"Wolf, no!" Cloud cried out though his voice was soft and in the noise of the lab, the cries and growls and the breaking of glass it did not carry. Raisa hissed, shifting slightly as she tried to look around for a weapon but all she saw was the flash of movement from the corner of one eye and again threw herself over Cloud.

The wolf again drew blood and Raisa couldn't help throwing her head back as she screamed. It was dangerous, exposing her throat but the pain was too much. The wolf's claws raked down her back and she felt as if she was on fire.

"No, wolf! No!" Cloud cried again, struggling in his mother's grip. "Wolf, _stop!_ " Cloud pushed his pain aside to make the command strong but wolf didn't hear and all Cloud could see, from the confines of his mother's arms was a confusing blur of motion. He could hear wolfs snaps and snarls and growls and feel his mother's laboured breathing. He could smell blood and knew that it was his mother's but her grip did not weaken and she shifted herself so that she covered him all, moving against the wall as she shielded him.

"My fault," Raisa said.

"No, not your fault," Cloud replied though his voice was a whisper.

Wolf growled again, crouching down.

"My pain, my penance," Raisa continued, her eyes screwed shut and Cloud didn't know what she was talking about. "Argh!" She screamed again as the wolf lunged in and nipped at her legs.

There came another growl and Cloud knew that sound. It was the one wolf made just before it was going to leap in for the kill. "No, wolf! _No_!" he screamed, his voice strong no matter his own pain that still seared through him. "Stop _wolf_!"

" _Please_ ," Raisa begged. "Just let him be okay," she said as she curled around Cloud, pushing his head down to her chest and holding him safe.

There was the skitter of claws on the stone as the wolf raced towards them, the growl of the animal leaping and then… nothing. Nothing but a startled yelp.

She expected pain. She expected blood and the sound of tearing flesh and cloth. But there was no pain and while the gashes laid open by wolf's claws hurt, they were not accompanied by others. She couldn't hear the wolf and for a moment Raisa wondered if she had lost her hearing but a glance down at Cloud showed that he was equally confused and was struggling in her grasp as he tried to break free.

"A snivelling child and a milk maid? That's what I get woken up for?"

* * *


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided I'll post the nine to ten chapters that make up part one on a nice schedule, then take a break while I write part two. Don't worry it's all the same fic, just for my writing purposes, it came out as part one and part two as there was a natural break. Part one is almost exclusively from Raisa's point of view. Part two shares the load around so we have Cloud and other characters moving to the forefront of the action. But that won't be for a while… I think I'm halfway through it.
> 
> The other thing is that given that most of the people on this website are American, I have tried to americanify my english... but it's difficult. This is things like 'ize' not 'ise' or my personal all time ... err let's not go there ... but 'mom' and 'mum'. I've probably missed things, so I apologize. (And I typed apologize with ISE first BOTH times!) I'm only mentioning this so that if you notice some times when the spelling goes back and forth, it's my fault.

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 6  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

The voice was gravelly and cold.

"No… not a milk maid," it continued as Raisa felt her limbs go stiff with fear. Whatever was behind her was worse than the wolf… Far, far worse. "A bitch of a woman who experiments where she is not wanted… just like the other." There was a growl and unlike the growl of the wolf, which was natural, this seemed to hold the hatred of the universe in it. It was inhuman and laced with power.

Claws gripped her shoulder pulling her upwards and away from Cloud and Raisa was spun around to see their savior.

She gasped but did not scream, blossoming agony from her back holding her voice. The twisting motion opened the cuts and there was a fresh gout of blood behind her. The claws drew their own blood and she looked into the face of a demon. It was vaguely human but the eyes burned red, and fangs adorned the mouth. The skin was a deep purple and looked almost soft but she was sure it was tougher than armor. The creature was naked and had a well-defined muscle tone and two leathery dragon like wings arched up behind it. It grinned at her, teeth exposed as it ran a long tongue over them.

"Perhaps this isn't too bad," the gravelly voice continued. "I couldn't get the other woman but I can get this one."

Raisa noted stupidly that the wolf was held in the creatures other hand, its yellow eyes closed but she saw the slight movement in the chest. Wolf was still alive.

"Don't hurt my mum!"

As proud of Cloud as Raisa could be, this was one time when she did not want her child anywhere near here. Yet he was here, and he did act and as the monster dropped the wolf to look down at her son, she lifted her hands, gripping the arm that was holding her to steady herself as she raised her feet, kicking as hard as she could towards the exposed parts she could see.

She impacted, she knew she did but her efforts got her thrown against the wall and stars danced in her eyes. Were monsters, no matter how well endowed, not as sensitive there as other males? There was a snap of leather and something heavy pressed against her chest. Raisa looked down to see one of the creature's wings holding her in place. The sharp talon pressed against her in warning. "Cloud!" she cried out as she was forced to watch.

The monster had knelt down slightly, one clawed hand reaching out to grab at Cloud's face, forcing her blue eyed boy to look into the monster's face. It was to his credit that Cloud didn't flinch and somehow managed to meet the monsters gaze clearly.

"So that's why…"

Raisa wasn't sure what she should think of the way the gravelly voice muttered the words thoughtfully as the monster peered closely at her son, bringing its face to mere millimeters from Cloud's as red eyes peered deeply into blue.

From behind them both the wolf stirred. A deep rumbling growl began low in wolf's belly as the animal gathered itself. The monster spared the animal no attention and was instead content to continue examining Cloud. When wolf finally got his feet under him, the creatures other wing snapped out, and the leading edge was driven down on to the wolf's neck, driving the animal back down to the ground.

"Stay there, Fenrir. I don't have time to play with you," came the order.

All was quiet for several long moments. Wolf growled at the monster yet his paws could not get traction on the stone to rise and Raisa's breathing was labored. With the wing tip pressed deeply into her stomach she couldn't rise either. And still the monster examined Cloud, turning her boy's head back and forth as it seemed to be trying to measure something.

"Don't hurt my mum!" Cloud repeated, bringing his small hands up in an attempt to hit the monster. He did hit the creature, but the dark skinned demon laughed, moving his other clawed hand to catch Cloud's fists.

"Oh, ho, ho, ho!" the monster laughed and Raisa shivered. "The little one has spirit! But spirit will do no good against me," the monster added with a hiss, rising to let Cloud dangle in its grip. Long talons pressed into Cloud's face but did not draw blood and the monsters wings shifted with his movements, keeping Raisa and wolf locked into place.

"So now what, little one? Will you continue to fight me?" the monster asked before laughing as Cloud stilled in the grip around his throat. But blue eyes continued to glare at the monster.

There was silence for a few more moments before the monster huffed slightly. "The Planet's Champion and the Planet's… well, I'm not sure what you are," the monster said, glaring at Raisa as it turned slightly. "This is quite a predicament. What were you trying to do, woman?"

The wing tip digging into her stomach released its pressure slightly and the monster's free hand gestured towards her to speak.

"Enhancing the wolf," Raisa answered, prompted to speak by something deep within her.

"Experimenting?"

"Enhancing," she repeated putting more force into her voice. She had no idea what this creature was. Even her memories were being silent but he smelt odd. With his look, she almost expected the typical fire and brimstone but instead what she was smelling was rich deep earth and that tinge in the air that one got right before rain. It was almost calming but there was an edge to the monsters tone that said it would not tolerate experiments.

"A subtle difference. Why?" Red eyes speared into her blue and Raisa took a deep calming breath when she saw it shift its grip on Cloud, releasing the tension on his throat somewhat.

"The future," she gasped, trying to ignore the way the wing tip moved on her body, the talon that had been pressing into her was released, though the wing was then twisted and the sharp cutting edge of the claw brought to rest under her chin. "I need to change the future," she added, not even sure how she could explain.

"And what of the cost?" the monster questioned, though his voice appeared almost amused. Raisa wasn't sure what that meant, or even if she was hearing that.

"Cost?" she asked her own question.

"The cost… what of the cost of your changes?"

"And what of the cost of leaving the future as it was?" Raisa made the challenge not even knowing if the monster would understand but no longer caring. The way it positioned its wing claw she had no choice but to answer and if it wanted her dead, then she would be dead. Regardless of what happened now, it had rescued her and Cloud, she had to assume that on some level the monster did not want them dead… no matter how much it acted like killing them would be the easiest thing.

Cloud was dropped and fell with a yelp but he scrambled to his feet and to his credit he did not back away. He stood, facing the monster as it turned towards his mother, one wing still stretched out to hold wolf in place.

"So… you would change the future?"

"I would."

"For your glory? For your gain?"

"No," Raisa replied. "For life," she continued feeling compelled to explain. Nothing she did was for herself. It was all for Cloud, it was all to prevent the future she remembered, the future she had watched from the Lifestream.

"Noble but a lie. Why?"

"For Cloud!" she screamed as the claw dug into her. The pain from her back was forgotten as the more immediate pressure on her throat became too much.

The monster grinned, his fangs shockingly white against his dark skin. "See, the truth isn't that hard," he growled at her, as his wings were pulled back and shuffled around his body. Cloud moved to hold wolf who licked at him as if nothing was wrong. The monster then moved towards the wolf, reaching out to grab one ear. With a sharp tug the monster knelt slightly moving to pull the wolf's yellow eyes around so that they could glare at each other. "Fenrir," the monster growled. "Do not challenge me again."

Wolf bared his teeth at the monster but submitted, earning another deep throated chuckle. "Leave wolf alone!" Cloud spat though his voice was tired.

"Oh, my little champion, I will leave your wolf. I will leave your mother but you…" the monster licked its lips, crouching down so that its face was level with Cloud's. "You, I will never leave." Gently the monster reached out to grasp Cloud's chin, pulling him close and placing one chaste kiss on the blond boy's forehead. "Sleep now," came the command and Raisa cried out as Cloud collapsed straight into the monsters waiting arms.

The creature rose, and gently placed Cloud on the desk, pulling a forgotten blanket over the small boy.

"So you would change the future, woman?"

"I have to," Raisa replied, struggling to remain conscious herself. The wounds wolf had inflicted hurt and it did not comfort her to see the way wolf now moved to stand at the monsters side, as if he recognized him.

"And what of the man who sleeps here?" the monster gestured behind her, towards the room she knew the red dressed man was.

"I will wake him before we leave."

"He will not wish to be woken."

"Then he will die," she replied simply.

"Ah, not afraid of blood," the monster laughed. "I like you woman, but you are still an experimenter… And that I cannot tolerate. For the future woman, remember, a diluted mako bath will ease the pain, but chose wisely, for the shock of hearing can be fatal to some."

"What?"

The monster shook its head. "How would you feel woman, if you went from the silence of your own mind, to hearing the world?"

"I don't understand."

"The _Lifestream!_ " the creature snarled, bending so that it was practically spitting the answers into her face, wings mantling above it. "What do you think you were giving Fenrir? You were giving him the Lifestream, condensed into Mako. You were giving him the Voice of the Planet. And you got lucky. I won't be here to protect the Champion next time, so don't make the same mistake again, meddler."

Raisa didn't know what to think but as she blinked the monster disappeared and she was left all alone in the basement, Cloud asleep on the table, her back dripping blood on to the floor and wolf just looking at her with curious glowing golden eyes. Unsteadily she got to her feet and staggered over to the chair, collapsing into it.

The process worked… But at what cost?

* * *

They waited a few days after that. It was a matter of necessity since Raisa's wounds had to heal. In that time wolf seemed unharmed and Cloud woke up without any ill effects from the night. He was the one who put their travelling packs together, and gathered the necessary supplies while Raisa rested.

It was a bit difficult to hide things from the villagers but they managed. It would not do to disappear with them knowing she was wounded. That would spread the word too fast and with her travel speed halved, they needed all the time she could get. She really should be waiting for the wounds to heal and that would mean waiting until the spring, but she felt the need, deep in her bones to move now. She spent the time she was recovering writing letters, some of which she even intended to deliver. Others were written only for herself. She condensed her notes into something only she would understand and she thought about what she would tell the man in red.

And then the morning dawned and as Raisa stepped out of her house in the darkness she trembled. _Now_ she was afraid. For everything that had happened so far, she had felt no fear. That was for now, that was for the first true action that would really change the future and for several long moments, just standing on the threshold of her house she could do nothing but shake as the enormity of the situation descended upon her. What was she thinking? She was a house wife! She had no way to change the future, no right, no ability… She was a nothing…

"Mom?"

Just like that, the fear crashed into nothing around her and Raisa smiled at her son, who was looking back at her from the front of their small garden, wolf at his side. She may have no right, and no ability to actually change the future, but for her boy, she would try. Firmly Raisa stepped across the threshold, closing the door behind her as she joined Cloud for the short walk to the Mansion, hiding in the shadows.

They left their packs in a sheltered alcove at the back of the mansion before going in. It felt different this time. Something about the Mansion was brooding. Monsters appeared but wolf showed his use, ranging in front of them, clearing the way. Raisa was thankful for that, because her back was still swathed in bandages and the best she could hope to do was fire off the flare gun. Wounded as she was, she couldn't use the rifle that was slung across her back. It was there for emergencies. Cloud seemed adept at the pistol she had given him but then, most mountain kids were adept with some weapons. Enough not to shoot themselves anyway.

It was risky but they laced the upper rooms with incendiary before making the slow journey to the basement. If she wanted to destroy everything then that's where the fire had to start and Raisa didn't trust that Shinra wouldn't just dig out the basement if that's what they truly wanted. This way they could dig all they wanted, but all they would find was ash.

Finally in the basement they made their way into a small room beside the laboratories. Raisa shivered as she looked around. It was one thing to know that Shinra was corrupt and allowed many forms of human experimentation, it was another to see the side effects of that experimenting and the casual nature with which Shinra accepted that. Scattered around the room were coffins, and Raisa had no doubt that they were full. And these were just the bodies that Shinra felt the need to 'honor' with a proper… with burial such as it was. Or perhaps these were the bodies they could not get rid of. It was unusual to have a body much past the time of death. She'd never had Damian's body.

Fiercely she wiped a tear from her eye and moved to the center coffin. The room was silent and freezing, far colder than it should have been with the advent of winter but that was not her concern for the moment. "Stay behind me Cloud," Raisa instructed and she felt his reply.

Slowly Raisa entered the room, holstering the flare gun as she moved towards the coffin and with a hard shove she pushed the lid off. Thankfully for her sanity it did not contain a desiccated body but instead the red dressed man was there. Someone she had seen only in her memory.

He was pretty she supposed but no one would ever hold a candle to her Damian. His skin was white and his hair was black. She didn't know how long he had been here but he was not emaciated and for her peace of mind that was something. The clothes he was dressed in was almost shockingly red in the gloom of the room which made the gold tipping his boots and covering one arm all the more stark. It was a strange combination but it worked. Raisa snorted to herself. It didn't matter.

"Wake up," she said, somewhat stiffly.

"Who?" The voice was groggy.

"Wake up!" Raisa repeated.

"Hmm? What do you know?"

She blinked, wondering where that question came from. This wasn't going how she envisaged it. The man in red was meant to be taciturn but not completely unapproachable. "I know about Sephiroth," the words slipped out.

"Sephiroth?"

"Shinra's General," Cloud spoke up though his voice was soft but in the quiet of the basement.

"Sephiroth is Shinra's General?"

"Has been for years," Raisa replied, though she wanted to shush Cloud.

"My sins are multiplied."

"Your sins?"

"My sins are of no concern to you."

"That's true," Raisa agreed. "But _my_ sins concern me and I would prefer not to commit another by murdering you."

"You could not woman." There was a slight hint of scorn in his voice.

"I'm not going to stab you. I am going to burn this mansion down to get rid of Hojo's research."

"Hojo?"

"Hojo's research needs to be destroyed."

"Will I meet Sephiroth if I go with you?"

"I don't know," Raisa replied. "But you aren't going to meet him if you stay here. Nor can you atone if you remain sleeping," she added slyly referring to the sins he spoke of.

The man looked introspective for a moment but before he could speak wolf pushed into the room and jumped up to look into the coffin. His tongue lolled out of his mouth and he barked slightly before shuffling higher to lick at the man.

From the door Cloud laughed and Raisa had to raise one hand to her mouth to stifle the laugh that threatened to escape.

"I don't care if you go back to sleep, but I would prefer not to kill you when this mansion is destroyed."

As the man sat up, pushing the wolf off him he looked around and Raisa didn't miss the way his red eyes opened slightly when he saw Cloud. There was something going on with her son that she did not know about if both the monster and this man recognized him. She knew he was important for the future she remembered but did that translate? Had she come back in time to rescue him from one future only to condemn him to one worse? No! That would not be. She would not allow that!

"Where will you go?" the man asked.

"West," Raisa replied, not sure how much of the modern world the man knew. "Shinra is currently using Sephiroth to fight a war there."

"Will you rescue Sephiroth?"

"That is not my intention," she admitted.

"I'll rescue Sephiroth!" Cloud interrupted from the door and Raisa smiled gently at him, not bothering to try to correct her son. He wouldn't be encountering Sephiroth for a very long time, if ever, if she got her way. The red dressed man nodded to Cloud and her boy flushed before there came the motion for Raisa to continue her explanation.

"I can't do that," the blonde woman continued as if she hadn't been interrupted. "I won't be able to get him away from Shinra but I want him to be able to know the truth. I want the planet to be able to know the truth, not the truth Shinra sees."

He nodded slightly. "I will come with you."

"I'd appreciate that."

"But I do not know how long I will stay."

Raisa nodded and backed away slightly. Once she got him out of here, she expected the man to leave almost immediately. There was some information she had found that she would tell him as soon as they were over the mountains. The wolf let himself down and returned to Cloud's side as the man leapt out of the coffin, before dusting himself off slightly and moving out into the corridor.

Setting fire to the Mansion was easy. Raisa simply started a baby fire, back in the underground library and then made sure that they retreated before the flames spread. Walking over the foot hills, with the burning glow from the Mansion behind them was quite satisfying. It was perhaps a waste to destroy so much knowledge, but Raisa had those few books and notes that she needed to show the truth. Letting it burn was the safest course of action.

Their progress through the hills was slow and Raisa chaffed at it, but was unable to go any faster. Her pack had been carefully made so as not to rub her wounds but they slowed her down. The weather was chill and the air was heavy with the promise of more snow but while they were walking, there was only the wind to accompany them. The first snows were on the ground but the path was clear enough.

"We are going up to the Reactor," Raisa said for the benefit of their travelling companion. "I don't think Jenova will be there, but we have to check. If she is, we are going to destroy the reactor. If she's not, I'll just leave the notes and we will continue on our way."

There was not even a nod from their new travelling companion but somehow Raisa could sense he was curious. "Jenova is the creature Sephiroth thinks is his mother."

"His mother was Lucrecia… beautiful Lucrecia."

"I know," Raisa agreed with the red dressed man. "But I only know that because I read some of Hojo's notes while he was experimenting. There was nothing in the mansion that says it. It's almost like Hojo is trying to keep the truth from Sephiroth."

"My sins…"

"We are sinful creatures," the blonde woman interrupted before the red dressed man could say much more. "I don't know why Shinra don't want Sephiroth knowing about his birth mother but that's one of the truths I think he should be allowed to know. What he does with the information after that is his own concern but it's such a simple thing and everyone should know who their parents are."

"Who are you woman, that you know such things?"

The question was so very direct and suddenly Raisa felt red eyes boring into her. Behind her Cloud tensed and the wolf growled softly at the feel of menace.

"Someone who knows the future," she said with a small smile, ignoring the wilderness around them and acting as if that one line should make everything clear.

The man said nothing but it was clear from his gaze that he did not believe her. Raisa fought the urge to tell him more knowing full well that silence was his chosen interrogation technique for this time. It was amazing what she could remember of the future and what gaps were in her knowledge. This man had helped her son, and for that, she would help him as much as she could, but not to the point of jeopardizing her own mission.

The silence stretched between them and Raisa could feel Cloud looking back and forth between them. He didn't quite understand what was going on but his confusion prompted the blonde woman to action. There was really only one more thing she could add to her explanation. "I am Cloud's mother," she said quietly, gesturing to her son. There had been recognition in the red dress man's eyes earlier, when he had first seen Cloud but he had given no further indication of knowledge. Whatever it was, perhaps it could tip the balance here.

"And for that you would challenge Shinra."

For a split second Raisa heard the words differently. She heard 'And for that you would change the future,' and she looked at the man before her sharply, then her mind caught up and translated his speech clearly for her and she knew he had not said that. His gaze lacked the soul deep knowing that one who knew the future carried. This man meant exactly what he said, no more no less, but Raisa couldn't shake the feeling that somewhere, someone had said what she heard.

"All mothers care for their sons," she replied softly.

Red eyes gave her a hard look and the man turned away and resumed walking towards the Reactor, giving Raisa and Cloud no choice but to follow.

The rest of the trip to the Reactor was uneventful and Raisa was thankful. She could not help but feel a tickling between her shoulder blades. Something was telling her to hurry for by now the villagers would have noticed that she and Cloud were missing. She hoped they'd try to search the ruins of the Mansion first, but it was more likely that they would send someone up the Mountain to locate them. She didn't really want to explain why she was not going back and at the moment, it would merely be speculation that she knew about the Mansion fire, though her absence probably confirmed suspicion. If she went back, it would be confirmed absolutely. Waiting in the village for Shinra was not an option.

The reactor was bigger than she remembered and loomed in the mountain like some sparkly insect. After Damian's death, Shinra had completely automated it, though they had been known to send a maintenance team up from time to time, just to make sure it was running in peak condition. That was their excuse anyway. Raisa didn't care. It made no difference then. It made no difference now. There would be no team there with the onset of winter.

She made no move to stop Cloud or the red dressed man when she mounted the steps to the Reactor entry, pulling out Damian's identity card as she climbed. She'd debated with herself for a long time before deciding to try to use it. If necessary she'd break in but she wanted Shinra to know who had done this. There was some logic in trying for anonymity, in just disappearing and allowing Shinra and the villagers to think what they would but that would focus _all_ of Shinra's investigative power upon her. By using Damian's card, knowing that the use would be recorded, she hoped to muddy the waters. It could be her, but would she be dumb enough to use his card? Or was it someone else, some other enemy of Shinra who was trying to frame her? Or was she merely a disgruntled former employee, her husband dead, herself redundant… Did she have some sort of plan for revenge? And if so where? Midgar… was most likely and if Shinra took that belief, she hoped they'd head any search in that direction first.

Raisa's precautions were flimsy enough as they were. She had two things on her side at the moment. One, Shinra didn't know anything was amiss and two, speed, at the moment she was completely ahead of them. If the snows fell right, she'd have a three month head start… despite the fact she was going to head into disputed territory. The real problem arose because she burned down the Mansion. She could have gotten where she wanted to go, even visited the reactor all without Shinra knowing. But she couldn't just leave Hojo's lies in place and no amount of effort on her part could have corrected the papers. She could have left the corroborating books out and opened but she had no guarantee that they would be checked and read. After all, Hojo's contemporaries didn't bother, why should anyone else? No, the Mansion had had to go. And by all rights she should be running as fast as she could right now. But she had to know. If Jenova was here, then it had to be destroyed here. It was too good an opportunity to pass up.

Resolutely Raisa swiped the key card.

Blue eyes sparkled happily when there was a bleep from within and the doors opened. She managed to suppress a hiss of surprise when their travelling companion swept passed her into the Reaction, his red eyes flickering over everything. After a moment he motioned that they could follower.

"What was that?"

"These places are dangerous," was the short reply.

"No more so than the mountain," Raisa retorted.

"..." The look said everything that the man wanted to say.

"How would you know?" Cloud's Mother snapped after a few moments of silence.

From the way their companion was standing, Raisa could tell that he wanted to remain silent but she would not accept that. "It was my job to know," came the reply finally.

"Shinra?"

There was a sharp nod and Raisa couldn't suppress the hiss from her quick intake of breath. Her memories definitely hadn't prepared her for that information.

"Turk," he said moving deeper into the Reactor.

Raisa's thoughts crashed in her head and it was only Cloud's touch to her wrist that brought them under control. She took a few deep calming breaths, moving forward as Cloud crowded the area behind her. Their companion may have worked for Shinra, but being laid to rest beneath their Mansion was grounds for termination of employment. He would not be returning to Shinra.

"I haven't been very polite," Raisa said by way of apology. "We should have done this earlier. My name is Raisa Strife. This is my son Cloud and his wolf."

"My name is Vincent, Vincent Valentine," the red eyed man turned slightly and replied.

"It is very good to meet you," the blonde woman said with a smile moving fully into the Reactor. She looked around at the confusing mass of pipes and lights. Damian would have known what they were for, but they just looked confusing to her. "Do you know the way to the core?" Her memories said that Jenova would be in the core if she was here.

Another sharp nod and Raisa caught the gesture for her to follow. She was tempted to make Cloud stay here in the beginning of the reactor but decided it would be best if he accompanied them. She didn't know what dangers were inside the reactor but she knew well enough the potential dangers that were without.

They encountered a few monsters in the reactor but they were minor things. Mutated spiders for the most part, a few field mice but Vincent crushed them all or wolf ate them. They went down, and through and around so many pipes that Raisa was lost. How Damian had managed to navigate his way through this mess all the time and actually know which pipe needed repairs, or maintenance she would never know. And then finally they were there...

The light was red. Capsules formed tiers around a central stair that lead to a larger capsule. They mounted the stairs and Raisa wasn't the only one that felt the air getting heavier. There was something oppressive here. Raisa actually shivered as she saw the scroll work on the central capsule. The letters spelt out the name Jenova and she would recognize that anywhere.

Vincent made precise movements as he tapped on the keypad. The door slid smoothly open and steam escaped. The room inside was blue but the light didn't mix at all. There was a sharp delineation between the rooms. "Wait here," Raisa told Cloud and for once he didn't argue. His nod was eloquent as he moved to the side, wolf going with him and he sat down at the end of one of the tiers to wait.

Once inside Raisa looked around. There room was large but there appeared to be an inner room. "If she is anywhere, it will be inside."

She nodded, gesturing for Vincent to open the inner door and was not surprised when he drew his pistol before moving to the door, tapping again at the keypad. Once against the door swung smoothly aside but Raisa didn't even have time to scream before the attack was launched.

The creature was big and ugly and appeared to have two heads. It was fat and far too brightly colored to be natural. Long teeth adorned the mouth and claws and spikes seemed to be everywhere. It was fast but Vincent didn't appear to be concerned. He had jumped away from a vicious slash firing his pistol at the monster. She saw the bullets impact but they didn't even appear to slow the creature down.

"What is that?" Raisa screamed the question, realizing as she asked how completely futile it was. It didn't matter what the creature was. It was big, strong and dangerous and they had to kill it. Nothing else should be their concern. Vincent kept shooting at it, trying to hit a vital point and while his bullets were penetrating, as evidenced by the thick dark blood dripping down the monster. Raisa drew back, wrestling with the rifle slung across her back. Another gun joined the battle and the deep throated growl of wolf was heard right before the massive animal ran in, biting and clawing at the creature. Raisa got a glimpse of blond hair and while she longed to tell Cloud to run, she couldn't spare the breath. He was doing well, hiding behind the door and ducking around only when he shot. She could see that his aim was true and in any other situation Raisa would have been proud. At the moment she was just scared. She finally got the rifle around to the front. It was loaded and she placed it against her shoulder, taking careful aim. The blonde woman couldn't help but cry out with the shock of recoil and she thought she felt the wounds on her back re-open but she didn't dare check. Not yet, not now and instead Raisa pulled the rifle back, taking aim again. There was a larger impact wound where the first bullet had hit and this was the strongest weapon they had. She shot again, crying out again, and this time definitely feeling the tears break.

"Yes! Mum!" Cloud called his encouragement and Raisa drew strength from her boy's voice as she raised the rifle again. The two pistols continued to fire and Raisa hoped that they were damaging the monster. Vincent was keeping the majority of the monster's attention for which Raisa was thankful. She didn't think she could survive if it hit her and she knew that Cloud wouldn't. She took grim pleasure in seeing the gashes that wolf's claws were opening in the hide of the creature.

Stars danced in her eyes after she fired the rifle again and this time Raisa sagged slightly. The monster took advantage of her moment of weakness and she smelt its breath hot on her skin before she could draw breath to scream.

After that things got fuzzy for Raisa but Cloud always told her that she was never in any danger. Something barrelled into the monster, driving it off her. She didn't see what happened but there as a cacophony of growls and snaps and snarls before there a moment of silence before a deafening roar.

The next thing Raisa knew Cloud was standing over, gently poking at her bandages and tugging some new ones into place. Vincent stood slightly at a distance, his back turned, and Raisa blushed when she realized her chest was uncovered. She maintained enough presence of mind to wait until Cloud declared that everything was all right before slowly slipping her clothes back over her wounds, buttoning them fast. "Is she here?" Raisa asked Vincent though she smiled at Cloud, thanking him for his efforts.

Wolf lay beside her, and seemed to radiate warmth.

"No," the gunman replied directly, turning to look at her. "You should not have moved with wounds like that." There was no accusation in his tone, there didn't have to be, she felt it never the less.

"There was no further time to wait," Raisa replied to the unasked question. "If I waited any longer, it would be too late to act."

"Too late for what?"

"Too late to change the future."

Red eyes blinked, and nothing more was said as Raisa rose. "I have to see it," she added shifting slightly so that she did not stagger.

"In the morning," it was Cloud who replied. "For now, you need to eat."

It was only then that Raisa really looked around and was surprised to see that they were in the first chamber of the Reactor again. Somehow they had manhandled her up out of the bowels of the Reactor to here and set up a small camp. "We have to go," Raisa shook her head. "Shinra will know by now."

"Shinra know nothing yet," Vincent assured her. "And even if they did, they would be doing nothing yet. You will wait until tomorrow."

She knew she was not going to get anything further and nodded sitting back down and accepting a bowl of something from Cloud. "Thank you," Raisa said to Vincent. She didn't know how the battle ended but obviously they had won. How was lost to her but perhaps how was not important. The fact that they were still alive had to be enough and she would ask later. Raisa ate slowly that night, they all did and she could sense the question heavily in the air coming from Vincent. After they had eaten and cleaned up, she breathed deep, sighing. "It is not an easy tale to tell," she said softly, almost inaudibly,

"The truth seldom is," Vincent replied, his voice dark with its own inflections.

"I know the future," Raisa said matter of factly, repeating what she had told him earlier. "I do not just _think_ I know. I _know_. I don't know how it happened but years back I collapsed, and when I awoke, I remembered. I remembered the future. I knew that Sephiroth would burn the world for Jenova. That he would be killed three times and that he would taint the life stream. I knew that Hojo would corrupt everything. And I knew that something had to be done to stop it."

"So you will change the future?" It was difficult to tell but there seemed to be amusement in Vincent's tone. It reminded Raisa of the Monster she had seen in the Basement.

"I will try," she answered as humbly as she could.

"You will die."

There wasn't much she could say to that not even when Cloud looked at her nervously. She had accepted death as a possibility but that did not mean she wouldn't try.

"How will you change the future?" The question came only after she had shifted slightly.

"Shinra needs a watcher," Raisa said almost with relief, feeling the tension lessen. "I intend to provide that watcher. In the future I remember Wutai is defeated. I will give them weapons so that they won't fall."

"..."

"I know how to enhance humans, just as Shinra does. I will give Wutai the ability to match Shinra in that manner."

There was only more silence from Vincent but Raisa could feel the question.

"It may lead to further death, and the continuation of the war will undoubtedly lead to more death. But in the future I remember, the world died. Thousands died of disease, of sporadic war, of a thousand things that Jenova created." Raisa took another deep breath and sighed. "I do not know if this is the best way. I don't even know how to get Wutai to listen to me, but this was the only way I could see to make a radical change in the time line."

There was a soft hiss of air from Vincent but he remained silent. Once again though Raisa heard a voice almost mocking her with its tone. "At least you gave this some thought."

"I will tell you more as we travel," Raisa offered though she had begun to doubt the wisdom of telling this man about Lucrecia. She would tell him. She promised herself that, but the world was a dangerous place and he was a strong warrior. They needed the protection on their path. Her lips parted but her tongue remained silent. She'd tell him once they got over the mountains, just as she had originally planned. Probably. She would pay for this deception but she would tell him when she could, but not before.

* * *


	7. Chapter 7

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 7  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

'There's been a fire in Nibelheim. You are going to investigate.'

The words rolled around Sephiroth's mind for the one thousandth, nine hundred and forty sixth time. The fact that it was Hojo's voice only made the thought worse but then Sephiroth had been hearing Hojo's voice giving him orders he did not like all his life.

This one was by no means the worst but it was one of the most inconvenient. They'd wrapped up the Autumn campaign in Wutai and were preparing the Winter occupation forces. Sephiroth had been looking forward to his week of assigned R&R, because even super soldiers owned by the company got some time off, when the order came through. And so here he was, being pulled from the oft times too hot Wutai to the chill of the Nibel mountains, slogging his way through the snow falls.

It had to be a First who was sent to investigate. He appreciated that much. No one else would be able to get through the snow falls blocking the roads to the village. But what Sephiroth didn't understand was why it had to be _him_.

There was no outward sign to betray his thoughts but internally Sephiroth snorted. It had to be him because Hojo ordered it. Which led to speculation about what the scientist had been keeping in the Mansion that was so dear to him? Hojo had been asked, but Hojo, being Hojo had said nothing.

And that led to another, entirely too familiar, path of thoughts on accountability between Shinra departments. At least Sephiroth wasn't alone in that. He knew Genesis and Angeal also despaired of the level of reporting the Army was meant to do regarding finances, personal, equipment and justification of orders and manoeuvres. They almost literally could not get a tissue from supply without requisitioning it in triplicate. Yet the science department, they spent millions and no one seemed to care.

The young man, who in a few years' time would be known almost exclusively as 'The Silver General', was not in a good mood when he crested the small rise which lead down to the township of Nibelheim. Because of this his dealings with the very surprised townsfolk were abrupt. He wasn't rude. Sephiroth had been trained from birth never to be rude but their exclamations of shock that he had come through the snow drifts were not helpful. He was standing before them. Of course he'd come through the snow drifts since the helicopters used by Shinra just weren't that effective in conditions this cold. Eventually he speared green eyes on the Mayor and asked the man to sit with him at one of the tables at the Inn. It was easy to ignore the man's trembling and in a tone that brooked no disobedience, Sephiroth asked what had happened.

"There was a fire."

Well yes, he knew that much already. Sephiroth placed his fingertips over his heart, feeling the picture that was sewn into the lining of his coat and gathering strength from the memory of the serenity it displayed. "What caused it?" His voice was even when he spoke, betraying none of the annoyance he felt at the banality of the situation.

The Mayor shook his head. "It was very sudden. It looks like it started in the basement and then the entire building went up. It happened early in the morning and by the time we were aware of it, the entire place was ablaze. I didn't even know the house had a basement."

"Mostly for storage of foodstuffs," Sephiroth lied smoothly. The basement had been used as a cool room, but it was far more extensive than that.

"The only other thing to note is that since that time Raisa and Cloud Strife have been missing."

"Missing?" That was new. No one had reported any missing villagers with the fire.

"At first we thought they were just up on the Mountain. The little tyke is probably one of the best mountaineers we have but when they didn't come back after snow fall… I just hope they weren't in the house." The Mayor looked suitably grim and Sephiroth resisted the urge to rub his eyes. He knew who Raisa Strife was and the implications of her going 'missing' _with_ her child were not good.

It could be innocent. They may have gone up to the Mountain and been trapped by snow. Or she might have been in the Mansion and died… though in that case what she was doing in the Mansion lead to another set of complicated questions. She wasn't meant to be in the Mansion at all. He'd have to ask the Veld for her personnel report. Or it could be something much worse. She might have been the one to light the fire and had fled the crime scene. It was difficult to know.

"I will look at her house before I leave then," he ordered easily.

"Don't you need permission for that?" One of the watching villagers blurted the question.

Internally Sephiroth sighed. He was no expert on small town dynamics but he was fairly sure that in towns like this, they tended to have an open door policy in regards to the homes. Such an objection was superfluous but he supposed he should not push the issue and his excuse was easy. "I already have permission," he replied, making sure that a ghost of a smile lingered on his lips. The Turks had spent quite a bit of time educating him in body language and its various meanings. "As an officer of Shinra, I have a duty to see to the welfare of all Shinra Employees. Mrs. Strife is currently missing, therefore I must locate her and that will require searching her abode for any clues."

That seemed to placate the villagers and once again Sephiroth found himself reaching towards the picture. Inwardly he shook his head. He hadn't needed his much re-assurance for a while. There was something about dealing with civilians that set his teeth on edge. He glanced over at the large clock on the wall. There was enough time for him to inspect the ruins of the Mansion but he would need to overnight here before he went up to the Reactor to ensure that it had not been targeted. He could probably have gone in the dark and the cold but this was not Wutai, and there was no need to push his body.

"I will inspect the Mansion now and then return. I will need directions to the Reactor since I do not believe it would be healthy for anyone to accompany me in this weather."

The villagers just watched silently as Sephiroth rose and flowed with all the grace of a hunting cat back out into the chill afternoon. Then they exploded into a gaggle of gossiping maids all unknowing that the soldier who was currently striding towards the burnt remains of the Shinra Mansion could still hear them.

* * *

Raisa didn't sleep much that night. Instead she meditated searching her memory for the identity of the creature that had been in the mansion. She remembered faces of those she'd never met, she remembered the green of the Lifestream, she remembered the time in the Mansion and the time she had spent raising Cloud alone in both times but she could not remember that creature. Was it something new? It didn't feel new.

There was not so much of a hint as to what it could be in her memories and frustrated Raisa rose and slowly made her way down into the core of the Reactor. She looked into the room where Jenova should be. It was empty, the blue light wane and chill and she gently placed one hand on the canister. It was cold… colder than the surrounding air. For one insane moment, Raisa wished she could rip the place apart but she couldn't and with Jenova not here, she had no reason to destroy the Reactor.

While she hadn't slept and hadn't gotten answers the night of meditation had given her an idea and instead of leaving the letter she had planned to, she wrote another one. She had to make some assumptions but from what the creature had said they seemed reasonable and if they were, then this letter would confuse the trail significantly. By now, Shinra would know that the Mansion was gone. They would be sending an investigation team, and even though there was not a shred of evidence against her, suddenly disappearing would be evidence enough. She placed the newly written letter at the foot of the canister and walked away, slowing making her way back to the antechamber of the Reactor. Eventually Shinra would find the letter and that should help remove suspicion from her. They had to move and pray that the snow would cut off the investigation team before they reached the passes.

It would be a close thing for themselves as well. Snow was indiscriminate. It would trap them on the mountain just as much as it would keep Shinra away.

They began making their way down the mountains but it was slow going. Sometimes they had to pick their way over rock fields and Raisa saw the way her son moved, his feet sure and swift and she was proud. It was much slower going for her with her injured back but she made it. She would not allow anything less. The wolf ranged around them and there was a few times when they had to turn back to find another trail. Cloud knew the mountains around Nibelheim like the back of his hand, but beyond the reactor was all new and while they knew the path existed, it was not the most well-travelled route. It was bitterly cold and the wind never stopped blowing but there was no snow or ice.

The first snow hit them in the foothills of the Nibel Mountains and when it hit, even as they searched for shelter, Raisa breathed a sigh of relief. Even if Shinra had dispatched an investigation team the instant they heard of the Mansion fire, the team would not yet have reached Nibelheim… Or they shouldn't have. Not if they were coming from Midgar but they would still have to be wary. A team could have been sent from Corel, Rocket Town… or even from Wutai.

They had encountered only a few monsters on the way down. That was probably due to the wolf who had ranged out before and around them and more than once they had heard growls and snaps indicative of a fight. But wolf had always returned, trotting back with his tongue lolling and his golden eyes glowing. Each night Raisa was comforted by the sight of Cloud using wolf as his pillow, one hand usually reaching up to grip the canine's winter coat.

In the evenings after Cloud had gone to sleep she spoke more to Vincent. The man was good, and he was teaching Cloud a little, showing him how best to stand and to aim to fire both the small pistol he had and the rifle she carried. Each night she wished she could tell him but while her heart screamed for her to tell him about Lucrecia her lips did not betray the name. They still needed the protection. One night after Cloud was asleep he watched her with dark red hooded eyes. "How much gil do you have?" The question was surprisingly straight forward.

"Enough to get to Wutai."

"Enough to buy materia?"

"Some."

"Get some in Rocket Town. Even if you do not need them, the Wutain's will use them."

"Anything in particular?"

"Restore. Use it on yourself."

Raisa nodded. "I'll get what I can," she replied.

Vincent nodded at her and settled down. She wasn't sure if he slept but she shared the watch with him. She was tired but it would be far more dangerous not to set the watch.

They travelled the next day through the grasslands and Raisa smiled indulgently at Cloud who ran around looking at flower seed pods and grass with wolf romping around him. Vincent kept an eye on him as well but the two of them were safe enough as they walked. It was cold and the wind blew constantly but for those born and bred in Nibelheim it was nothing. Looking back at the mountains Raisa could see snow on the peaks and she knew the trials into Nibelheim would be well and truly blocked. By now the village would know she was not just 'out for the day' and would no doubt have reported that to Shinra but she was just a lowly illiterate cleaner, there was no reason they should search for her, Mansion fire notwithstanding.

Resolutely Raisa shook her head and pulled out a piece of paper. While there was still light from the fire she felt she should write what she knew for Vincent about Lucrecia. It wasn't much, just that the woman was still alive and hiding somewhere in the mountains. If he decided to leave them she would give him the letter. And even when she told him, she'd give him the information as well. She owed him that much.

* * *

The Silver General laughed at the image he presented. It was going to take him at least a week to get the tangles out of his hair! The cursed wind was just too strong and eventually he'd been forced to find a small patch of shelter and to pull his fingers through the long strands as best he could and plait it up, tying off the end with a bit of string that had been used to wrap his lunch. If Genesis could see him now, the other man would be laughing. Sephiroth took care of his personal grooming, but he didn't obsess.

He sighed softly as he looked around. He was high in the mountains now and with the bite caused by wind borne snow, he was thankful that the villagers had insisted he take the lunch they had prepared for him. His rations would be adequate but they were rations. Food was food but even he enjoyed the difference between a home prepared meal and the mass produced energy packs that were standard emergency army fare.

The woman's house had been empty and had provided no clues as to her whereabouts. Indeed, the little cottage was shocking in its normalcy but his eyes were sharp and with the villagers crowding the door he had looked around, spotting the empty Shinra issue protein bar package that had been laid down as kindling in the small stove and the few empty places on the shelves. It was what was missing that told him so much more than what was present. Blankets, food and there was not a single gil in the house. Granted Nibelheim was a small village, but its economy relied on some gil, not just barter. There should have been at least one gil somewhere. But there wasn't, and combined with the missing blankets and foodstuffs it did not paint a good picture for the former Shinra employee. Even so, he did not jump to assumptions.

The Mansion, he'd seen from first glance that it had been a loss. The fire had been deliberately lit because even after a few days he could smell the faintest trace of acid as well as the tinge of Mako. Whoever had lit it though had known what they were doing and the entire place was reduced to charcoal and ash. He'd picked through the ruins easily, being careful to avoid the worst of the ash and a long bath at the Inn that night had taken care of the few smudges that had gotten on to him. There was nothing salvageable unless something had been in a fire proof container in the basement. But even if it had of been, with the thoroughness of the attack, Sephiroth doubted they would have left such a thing unharmed. Shinra, and Hojo would have to accept that the Mansion was gone and whatever work that had been sloppily left behind was also gone.

The next day had thankfully dawned clear and so he'd headed up the mountain. The villagers had offered a guide but he had seen their furtive relief when he declined. It was bitterly cold and no unenhanced would be able to survive for long without quite a lot of supplies. He did not have the time to slow down that much. Still, they provided directions to the Reactor as well as for the path over the mountains into the Rocket Town area as best they could and the Innkeeper's wife had insisted that he take her home made lunch and a skin of ale.

Except for the wind the trip up to the Reactor had been uneventful. Masamune took care of the few problems he encountered but most of the animals were not yet starving with winter and so left him alone. He'd looked at the land a bit. It was the land that was in his picture but he did not have the time to indulge and try to find the waterfall. If Sephiroth was honest with himself, he doubted he'd be able to find it without help. There were just too many little valleys.

He was cautious when he entered the Reactor. The Mansion had been deliberately burnt down. Whoever had done in it had no respect for Shinra property and so there was no reason that the Reactor would not be suffering from either sabotage or booby traps. There was nothing on the outside, and as he entered the opening chamber he could detect evidence that someone had been here recently and he suppressed a small smile. The smell of blood lingered. So… whoever had destroyed the Mansion had most likely been here as well and at least one was injured though they had left nothing in the remains of their little camp that could identify them.

There was nothing in the Reactor until he got near the core and then even he faltered. The debris of a battle was hard to miss, especially when the body was still there. That was slightly surprising. With so much Lifestream around there shouldn't be a body but there was which was his first warning. Nothing natural survived this long after death, especially where there were no carrion eaters. Carefully Sephiroth knelt and examined it.

The red and purple body was littered with bullets but they had not killed it. There were claw marks and evidence of bites and it had definitely been a combination of fangs and claws that had ripped out the creature's throat, delivering the final blow. Green eyes narrowed as they flicked around the chamber, piecing together the battle. Finally, Sephiroth shook his head and he rose, looking up and froze.

"Jenova."

He wasn't even aware that he had spoken until his voice echoed back at him.

He knew who Jenova was of course. Jenova was his mother. The mother he had never met and never seen… But what was her name doing in one of Shinra's Reactors? In the core? Adorning the door to the central chamber in this backwater place? Sephiroth had ascended the stairs before he even knew what was happening and it was almost as if it was someone else who watched his hand touch the door. The mechanism activated and he stepped into the blue lit room, green eyes taking in everything.

There was nothing there. There had been. There was a central pod, bigger than the rest, raised above them and a myriad of wires and pipes lead to and from it but within the pod there was nothing. Sephiroth wasn't sure what that meant. He wasn't sure he wanted to know anyway.

Jenova was his mother. But the implications of the pod… Had she been here? It certainly looked like it. But how would any human survive such a thing? Mako could be beneficial. He and the other SOLDIERs were evidence of that but that amount was miniscule. The amount of mako in a Reactor… No human could survive that.

Unless…

Unless Jenova was not human.

Sephiroth blinked. Was that it? Was that why no one had ever told him anything beyond the name of his mother?

There was something… It was right on the edge of his mind, tantalisingly close but refusing to be pulled into the light of consciousness. He frowned before shaking his head savagely, sending the braid of his hair thumping heavily at his body. It didn't matter. Or rather it did but he could not pursue it now. Green eyes examined everything and he committed it all to memory. And that's when he saw it. It was a small slip of white that almost glowed in the light. How he'd missed it at first he didn't know and he bent to pick it up.

A letter? What was a letter doing here? A cruel smile creased his lips. Up until now he had only speculation to go on. There was no proof that anything was wrong. But a letter… that was proof. The hand that had written it was not practiced and the words were shaky but it was legible. A letter to Hojo. Oh this should be interesting. He could almost hear what Genesis would be saying about that.

Carefully the Silver General flicked it open. He'd felt that there was nothing more than paper in it and with calculating eyes he read. The penmanship did not improve on the inside and while the words were adult, the way that they were formed indicated that the writer was not practiced. They were intelligent but something wasn't right with the letter. The tone did not match the hand writing.

_Hojo,_

_Guess who's free?_

_Your bitch of a housekeeper was far too thorough for her own good. But don't you worry, she won't be spilling any of your secrets._

_You try sleeping for years and see how hungry you get. Oh, that's right, you'd get dead. Pity..._

_I took her brat as well. I'll need a snack while I go hunting your bitch of a wife, Lucrecia. Heh, you didn't reckon she was alive… but she is. The planet reeks of her presence. Of Jenova taint._

_And just in case you are wondering I will find that bitch as well._

_Gather your creations close Hojo, keep Lucrecia's son close to you. If they amuse me enough it might garner you five more minutes of life. I doubt it though, I'm not known for my patience so watch for me Hojo, because one day I will be there._

There was no signature and after looking at the words again, Sephiroth closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. And then he mentally added the letter to the list of things that did not make sense about this entire situation.

Slowly he made his way back out of the reactor and then into the wind. In the doorway he looked around. Did he return to the village or did he continue on, attempting to track the people who had slept here?

Track. He eventually made up his mind. He had been sent to investigate, and right at the moment, he only had more questions.

If the letter was to be believed, then he could assume that something had woken up in the Mansion and had supposedly eaten the Housekeeper. He wouldn't be surprised if there had been something in the Mansion that was dangerous enough to do that but it didn't fit with the evidence of the battle in the Reactor. There had been three different calibres of bullets in that creature. Two hand weapons and a rifle. While one might have used multiple weapons, the angles of the bullets pointed to three different shooting positions. That meant at least three combatants… It seemed a safe assumption that one had been Shinra's Housekeeper and one would have been her son… but who was the third? The creature that was claiming to have written the letter… the one that said it ate the woman? Or was there more than one creature?

That could be right. There were two sets of claw marks on the body. One was a set of four claws. They were large enough that whatever caused those marks could have easily taken down a human but they were slightly smaller than the other set. The other set had a fifth claw coming in from another angle. Those marks were disturbingly human.

As for Hojo having a wife… _That_ was news but not so surprising that it was not possible. There were women enough who flung themselves at him because he was a warrior. They saw the power, not the man and while Hojo was Hojo, he was powerful. So the good Professor had been married. It was not that surprising really though the Silver General really didn't want to think about it further. But what was Jenova taint? And how was it supposedly connected to this other woman, Lucrecia? Jenova was his mother. She did not have a taint… she shouldn't… He did not have enough information to know the truth of the matter so reluctantly he let it go. Though who was Lucrecia's son? That didn't make sense. The letter said that Lucrecia was Hojo's wife but said nothing about him fathering a child. 'Lucrecia's son', not your son. It made no sense.

Sephiroth looked at the sky. It was only early winter and the sky was still light but it was getting late. The shadows in the high mountains were long. He'd need shelter though perhaps he could continue moving through the night. That would be dangerous but he shouldn't have any trouble following the path. His eyes were good enough. With a sigh for his leave that was quickly disappearing he sealed the Reactor and began following the path deeper into the Mountains.

* * *

Raisa didn't remember the world being this big! Well, she supposed she did. But the last time she had been on a journey this long from Kalm to Nibelheim, she had been travelling in the back of a truck and she had been in love. The memory was distinctly rose tinted. She was getting noticeably tired of walking. Even the novelty of travel was beginning to wear off for Cloud who was trudging along. If it had of been summer his feet would have been kicking up little puffs of dust with each step but as it was winter, the ground was suitably wet that no dust was seen. With the thick grass surrounding the path only the occasional boot print betrayed their passing except where they squashed the grass to make camp. Still, that could be any one, not just them.

Granted their pace was slow because of her injuries and Cloud's youth. But the journey was still boring. Not that she wished to be attacked. That would provide just a bit too much excitement but she did wish that they could travel faster. She couldn't shake the sense that something was gaining on them.

They were reasonably close to Rocket Town. Last night, when you climbed a rise the glow of lights was visible in the distance, but it was still another two to three days travel on foot. They'd be okay. Cloud had packed enough supplies but her funds would take a hit in Rocket Town and they were almost out of protein bars. Wolf's hunting had helped, giving them a rabbit or two for dinner as well.

The small trail they had been following had joined with a road and Raisa had hoped that they might be able to hitch a ride but there had been no passing traffic. If she thought about it, she wasn't that surprised. This was one of the roads to Nibelheim and in winter the passes snowed closed. It was ironic that the road between Nibelheim and Rocket Town was so good since the town was meant to be a haven for science and was ostensibly dry… Yet Nibelheim's number one export was beer… To Rocket Town.

While Rocket Town was a haven for science, it also housed part of the military for the war. Not the ground troops, the grunts and the SOLDIERs but the air force, such as it was. She'd heard that they were developing rockets, hence the town's name but there was also the project for space travel. Even so, Raisa was hoping to find transportation to Wutai, even if it meant risking stowing away on a transport. But with Vincent, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to.

"Are you coming to Wutai?" she asked, her voice breaking into the monotony of their walk.

She could feel the way Vincent's red eyes looked at her. Calculating, yet considering and she wondered if he had even thought about it. "I do not think so," he said at length and Raisa nodded. It was a logical decision but she had no doubt that he had reasons beyond those she already knew. It would not be good for a Turk, even a former Turk to enter Wutai.

"My original plan was to try to sneak on to a troop transport to Wutai but that doesn't seem like such a great idea now. Do you have any ideas?"

"That depends."

"On?"

Usually Raisa wouldn't discuss this sort of thing in front of Cloud but he was old enough that he should know the truth. He was walking with them, but remained silent though she could tell he was listening.

"How much gil you have and if you want to get there without being reported."

"I don't think I have enough to bribe anyone," Raisa said after giving the matter a little bit of thought. She had gil, saved from her work in the Mansion but she'd intended that money to support them on the trip to Wutai, not to have to use it to bribe people. Buying some materia would push into her reserves but that may be necessary since she would need something to open negotiations with the Wutai. If she was honest with herself, she had only the vaguest idea of how she was meant to walk up to a Wutain and tell them she had the knowledge that she did. There was some memory from her older self which kept bumping into her conscious mind and it seemed clear enough but along with the tinge of the Lifestream, it carried the hint of doubt. It could be a memory of now, or it could be a memory of one hundred years ago. She was certain that it would work out in time. It seemed weak to say it was fate, but the Planet _did_ want her to succeed. She had faith that she would get the opportunity. Somehow.

"You could pay for passage. Most transporters will take jobs on the side," Vincent said softly.

Raisa nodded at the knowledge. She had thought about that, but she wasn't sure they would wish to take someone into a war zone, even in winter when the fighting was less severe. It would probably be reported to Shinra. "I need to give you something before we part," Raisa said.

"…"

The silence was its own question and she could tell that Vincent was curious. "I'll give you what gil I can," she clarified, "but that's not what I meant. I have some notes for you. I know you don't necessarily believe me about the future but I've written down what I can remember. Everything I can remember about Hojo and where he will be and what he will do. I want you to have the information." _And everything I can remember about Lucrecia,_ she added silently, not yet finding the strength to tell him.

He nodded and when they next stopped for a short break, Raisa rooted through the top of her pack to find the letter she had written. She handed it to Vincent, feeling guilty. He wouldn't read it until they parted and cowardly she hoped he would forgive her for the deception. She hadn't written a justification for anything. There wasn't anything she could possibly say that would justify her actions. She merely hoped he would understand.

* * *

Sephiroth sighed to himself. It was dark but he was still travelling. He had been hoping to find nothing but that was not to be. He wasn't the best tracker but he had enough skill to see when others had passed the way he travelled, and there were three sets of boot prints going over the mountains. They were accompanied by a dog, a large dog, which explained one set of claw marks on the Reactor Monster.

The tracks were fresh and with the fire there was only one logical explanation. Someone was fleeing. Whether it was the woman, or some unknown party he didn't know yet and he wouldn't know until he caught up to them. It could be the woman with her son and someone else. But the villagers hadn't reported anyone else missing and it was unlikely that she would have called someone to meet her. If there had of been anyone new in the village, they would have mentioned that.

Which supported the theory that something had woken up in the Mansion and had broken free. It did not support the evidence in the Reactor though. Three calibres of bullets and two sets of claw marks. What had made them? There was no monster that he was familiar with that had five claws arranged in that configuration. And if something had woken up, why was it accompanying the woman? Was it forcing her or was she going of her own will? He could see no signs of a struggle and her house had been too neat for someone forced to pack.

There was something going on here and the only way he was going to get answers was to catch up. That's why he was pushing himself through the night. Though Sephiroth was pragmatic. He already knew his chances were slim. Even on foot, even travelling at the pace of a child, they had a large head start. And once they got to Rocket Town, assuming that they could all pass as human, then they could go almost anywhere.

He shook his head and hurried his steps. There really was nothing else he could do for now.

* * *

Raisa paused on the rise overlooking the town and gulped. It was so much bigger than Nibelheim, so much more frantic. Everywhere she looked something was going to and fro. "Cloud, stay close to me," she gave the instruction automatically. There was some sort of scaffold at the back of the town and around all the permanent houses there were tents and lean-tos. They were well maintained so she figured they were part of the army and the blonde sent a silent prayer to the planet that Shinra hadn't put out a search request for her. As one of the towns closest to Nibelheim, Rocket Town would have gotten that. "Do you see that house with the double chimneys and single gable?"

Cloud came up beside her, his eyes wide at what he was seeing and Raisa made sure she smiled down at him comfortingly. He nodded to her question after he looked pointedly at the town for a few moments.

"If you get lost or separated from me, then got to that house and wait. I will find you there. You too wolf."

Cloud nodded again and wolf barked and Raisa had the strangest feeling that the wolf completely understood her instruction.

"It's late," she continued. "We should get to the Inn and tomorrow we can see about supplies and a passage to Wutai."

"I will leave you now."

The announcement took her by surprise and Raisa found herself staring at Vincent. Surely not… Surely he'd have at least a night of rest… "If it's about the Inn, I am more than happy to pay for you," she said, feeling almost dumb as the words left her lips.

"…"

That was not the silence of embarrassment or denial. It was something else. "It will be okay, Mum," Cloud said after a moment. "Vincent doesn't really like to be around people."

Oh. That made sense. It fitted with what she remembered and what she could deduce but she had thought he would stay at least one night to recuperate after the hike over the mountains. But already Vincent was beginning to show signs of impatience. On anyone else, it would seem they were the very picture of infinite patience, but on this man, she could see the slight stirrings. He wanted to be gone, to be away from the press of people that were below.

"I understand," Raisa said, turning to face their companion and giving him a short bow. "Thank you," she said, not bothering to elaborate on what she was thanking him for. There really was too much to mention in just a few words.

He nodded his acknowledgement and let Cloud make his own goodbyes. And then Cloud and Raisa watched as he turned and walked back down the rise, disappearing into the trees at the bottom of the small hill as if he had never been there in the first place. It was a moment of quiet, of serenity and it took Cloud all of two seconds to change the mood, tugging on her arm as wolf jumped a little.

"Mum, let's go!" It was obvious he wanted to visit the town and Raisa felt the slight melancholy that had embraced her heart seeing Vincent leave them lift instantly.

"Yes, let's go," she agreed and led the way down to the Inn.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's probably not entirely clear, Sephiroth starts out a few days behind them. The scene's fitted together if I started with him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some swearing in this chapter. They are in Rocket Town... I couldn't help it!

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 8  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

The first night in Rocket Town, Raisa slept poorly. She kept waking, expecting to be attacked by an enraged Vincent once he read her letter. It didn't happen but the feeling didn't dissipate the next day. If anything it got worse and she could tell she was jumpy as she gathered supplies by the way she kept looking over her shoulder. Cloud on the other hand, was having a grand time. He stayed close to her, as per her instructions but whenever she turned her back to bargain for what they needed he'd move away a little to look at this or explore that. Wolf was with him, but wolf was on his best behaviour. Somehow the animal seemed to realise that if it strayed too far, it might be seen as a threat and hunted so Wolf was making very sure that the Townsfolk knew he had an owner. She might have laughed if the situation was not so serious.

She bought supplies and some materia and convinced the shop keeper to use the Restore on her to demonstrate that it worked. It was a good thing that it was late in the day because the relief to her muscles was so great it left her fatigued. She had not been aware of how much the pain of the wounds had been accompanying her.

Though there was one problem. Raisa hadn't come out and said she wanted transportation to Wutai but every time she hinted at the need in conversation the shop keepers turned the conversation the other way. No one was interested in talking and it made no sense. Rocket Town wasn't that much bigger than Nibelheim, surely they liked to gossip… All the silence was worrying and she knew she'd be remembered even for the vague hints she had given. Yet there was no help for it. They had to get to Wutai… somehow.

She was still worrying about it when Cloud lead her up the stairs at the Inn and to the small room she had rented. He gently pushed her on to the bed and Raisa smiled at him. There was nothing more she could do today and she was tired, so she should rest. After getting ready she lay down and looked up at Cloud who sat beside her. Wolf was sitting at the door, watching with his curiously glowing yellow eyes before he crossed his forepaws and lowered his head. "Who do you kill?" Raisa asked suddenly, already beginning to drift off to sleep.

"Jenova," Cloud replied promptly, not surprised by the question and with the comforting answer that had been there for years, Raisa slept. She'd look at all the problems tomorrow.

Of course, she'd forgotten about all the problems that could arise that night.

Cloud watched as his mum fell asleep, his blue eyes soft and gentle. They reflected nothing of his excitement that only began to glitter through his gaze when her breathing became steady. Carefully he pulled the blankets higher. While the cold here had nothing on a Nibelheim winter, his mum was still injured. He did not want her catching a chill on top of that. He waited another few minutes before backing away, not tripping over wolf who had silently leaped to his paws and moved out of the doorway. Cloud gave wolf a tight grin as he quietly slipped out the door to the little room and moved back down the stairs.

Freedom!

It was not that his mum was confining. Not that much anyway. He understood her concerns that she did not want him getting lost in a new town but he wanted to explore! There was so much to see and who knew if he'd ever be back in Rocket Town? He had to see it all now! Wolf trotted behind him, claws clicking lightly on the timber of the stairs. Wolf had been on his best behaviour while they had been in the town but Cloud knew he wanted a run. Soon, he said to his companion with a glance as the two of them stepped into the chill air. Cloud resisted the urge to laugh as he ran through the streets looking at everything he had wanted to. It was dark, but Rocket Town had lights and under the false light the town was fascinating. There was so much to see but while Cloud liked to think he was adult, he quickly tired and headed back to the Inn. The small amount of freedom had been enough.

Dinner was included with their room and as Cloud re-entered the Inn the matronly woman who ran the place smiled at him and indicated that he should take a seat in the common room. She'd bring him and wolf some food.

"Who's ef'n mutt is this?"

It took Cloud a few moments to realise that while he had been waiting for his dinner, his feet stretched out towards the warmth of the fire, Wolf had left his side. He turned slowly and looked over the common room to the door.

Wolf was standing beside a man, blocking the entry, looking up at the figure with bright golden eyes, wagging his tail. He wanted affection and that surprised Cloud. Wolf never wanted affection from anyone he didn't trust… so this man was trustworthy? Blue eyes narrowed as he examined the man who was looking down at Wolf with an expression of bafflement.

The new comer had washed out blond hair, cropped short and unnecessarily held back out of his eyes by a pair of goggles strapped around his head. Cloud almost snorted when he saw the cigarette packet thrust through there. The man had on heavy boots, but then most people did with the cold, military green cargo pants and a heavy denim jacket with long red gloves. He was dressed for the cold and there was nothing really outrageous about his attire… Except for the white scarf around his neck. It wasn't one of the heavy scarves worn for warm, instead it was a light fluttering thing that seemed to pick up every errant breeze because even the slight motion of air in the room was making it move. What was that supposed to be?

Cloud giggled, unable to hold back the snort like laugh. The noise brought wolf's attention back to him and the great animal barked once in acknowledgement.

"So he's your ef'n dog?" The man grumbled and Cloud was confronted by blue eyes boring into him.

"His name is Fenrir, Sir," Cloud said as he stood and made his way through the room. All the other patrons were watching, though there was no sense of distress, just of interest.

"No it's not. Ya gotta earn a name like that."

"So you know the old gods?" The question just fell from Cloud's lips. The man had the right colouration but no one outside of Nibelheim followed the old gods.

"I know 'em. I don't follow 'em," the man replied.

"Oh," Cloud looked down, his eyes hooded and slightly sad.

"But I do know that you don't get a name like that without earning it, brat."

There was a note of challenge in the tone and Cloud felt something in him respond. "You don't follow the old gods but you insist upon their ways?" He asked sending his own challenge back more directly. "How 'bout he proves it?" Cloud lay one hand on Wolf's head, petting the soft fur there.

The man's blue eyes blinked in surprise and a wide smile crossed his face as he laughed in sudden mirth. "Oh, you've got courage brat. I like that idea. If your mutt can prove to me he's worthy of the name Fenrir I'll…" the man trailed off and Cloud could sense uncertainty in him about what to wager.

"Give the kid a ride," One of the patrons yelled out.

"A ride?" Cloud asked, not sure he liked the sound of that.

"Highwind there is forever telling us he's the best pilot. Have him prove it to you kid."

"You're a pilot?" Cloud asked.

"Best darn pilot in Shinra."

At the word Shinra Cloud did his best to control his flinch but he was sure it was seen. Shinra hadn't done anything to him but his Mum had made it very clear that they were to be avoided. The man, Highwind, saw it and his eyes widened in surprise. No one usually reacted that way to the name so there was definitely something going on with this kid.

"Eh. Don't worry about it brat," he said, trying to comfort the kid. "You got yourself a deal though. If your mutt can prove to me he's worthy of the name Fenrir, I'll give you a ride in the 'Bronco."

"The Bronco?" Cloud asked.

"My plane. The Tiny Bronco. Best darn plane in the world. Here to Wutai and back on one tank."

Wutai… That could solve any number of problems. Cloud smirked. "All right," he agreed to the wager after sharing a long look with Wolf. "Fenrir will prove that he is worthy of the name, and you will give us a ride in your plane, the Tiny Bronco," he didn't even bother to phrase it as a wager.

The smirk made Cloud look slightly conniving but he was too young to truly carry off that look and the man laughed, his own grin easy. "All right brat, you got yourself a deal. All your mutt has to do to prove he's worthy of that name is find a stash."

"A stash?"

"A stash!" The man grumbled. "Look around you brat," he instructed, gesturing. "This is a bar, or it's meant to be. But it's a sorry excuse for a pub because it's dry!"

Cloud blinked, not seeing the problem.

"There's no beer!" the man snapped at him and Cloud's eyes flooded with understanding. He's never seen the bar at Nibelheim without beer. "Bloody Shinra," he paused as the room shouted their assent, "made the entire town dry because some Egg Head of a Scientist decided that's best. So, here's the deal. Your dog finds someone's stash of alcohol. Beer, whiskey, hell, I'll take cooking sherry! If the mutt finds that I'll admit he's worth the name Fenrir and give you and the mutt a ride in the Tiny Bronco and if he doesn't…" Again Highwind paused as he realised there was no penalty for the lad before him.

"I'll change his name, and clean the Tiny Bronco for you," Cloud offered the forfeit.

"No way in hell you get to touch the Bronco," the reply was automatic and brought a laugh from the surrounding patrons. "You clean my house."

"Okay," Cloud agreed and wolf barked once from his place, offering his own agreement. He held out his hand to seal the deal.

"What's ya name brat?" The blond man asked.

"Cloud Strife."

"Well Strife, I do hope ya know how ta clean house," the blond added, taking Cloud's offered hand and sealing the deal.

With a cheeky grin Cloud looked up at him. From close, the man was rougher than Cloud had originally thought and the stubble on his chin was obviously habitual, but Highwind had an air of competence about him and Cloud was reassured. Besides, wolf liked him, which was always a good sign. "Of course I do, Highwind," the blond boy replied. "But I'm going to be enjoying that plane ride."

"That's Cid to you brat," the man introduced himself as they parted.

"Come on Fenrir," Cloud said as he moved passed the man into the corridor of the Inn, his tiredness forgotten in the excitement of the moment.

"What? You're going now brat?"

In response Cloud and wolf both looked back over their shoulders and Cid fell silent. For an instant he hadn't seen a boy and his dog, but a warrior and his wolf, blue and gold eyes glowing in the darkness. He blinked and by the time he looked back, Cloud was gone, slipping away into the chill night air. Savagely Cid shook his head as he moved properly into the common room. It was safe enough in the town so the brat would be okay. And tomorrow, he'd have someone cleaning his house and while that thought was pleasing, calling for the piss that Shinra passed off as beer was irritating. It was even more irritating when he took a gulp.

Eh… if the mutt did find a stash it would be well worth it.

* * *

Four hours later, most of the villagers had left the Inn, heading for their own beds. Cid was still at the bar. He'd gotten into an argument with a couple of soldiers stationed in Rocket Town. The argument was about the continual development of air fighters for the war in Wutai, a subject that was near to Cid's heart. Not the fighter bit, but the planes themselves. He'd seen some of the designs and he couldn't wait to fly them.

The troopers held the opposite opinion. To them, air support was more trouble than it was worth, killing more friendlies than it did ninja. They just figured Shinra ought to make more SOLDIERs and that would end the war.

The argument had been quite long and Cid hadn't held back, much to the consternation of the Matron but the locals had mostly cheered him on and none of the patrons had complained so it was probably okay.

Cid though, was taken by surprise when he felt a tug on his sleeve. Truth be told, he hadn't expected to see the brat again. He'd figured Cloud Strife was just transiting through Rocket Town and their guardian would leave with him in the morning. The pilot was therefore astonished when he looked down and saw the brat, his dog standing proudly beside him.

"Wha' d'ja want brat?" He asked, ignoring the troopers who were now insinuating he was running from a fight.

Cloud looked up at him, his eyes tired though faintly happy and to say Highwind was speechless was an understatement when Cloud calmly handed him a bottle.

"You're shit'n' me!" Cid exclaimed, taking the bottle. It was unmarked but filled with amber liquid. Suspiciously he worked the cork loose and took a whiff. "Holy…" his voice was almost reverent and it brought attention.

"I don't ef'n believe it."

Weakly Cloud beamed up at him, though the lolling of wolf's tongue over white teeth was far more of a grin.

"All right," Cid acknowledged his defeat. "The mutt is worthy of the name Fenrir." Wolf barked once, softly so that he didn't wake anyone. "Off to bed with you brat. Call by in the morning to collect the rest of your wager. For now, I have a new friend." Cid dismissed Cloud who nodded and quietly left the room.

Wolf licked Cloud's hand, allowing the boy to lean on him as they made their way upstairs. Before they left the common room though, Wolf looked back once, fixing glowing yellow eyes on the pilot who was even now pouring shots for everyone left at the bar. Fenrir had the scent now. They would be there in the morning.

* * *

Raisa listened with a growing sense of disbelief as Cloud spoke to her. It was unreal but his face shone with sincerity and wolf was lying at his feet, apparently completely disinterested in their conversation but quick enough to lift his head whenever his name was said.

"So you found a pilot last night?" She asked, running through the tale he had told.

"Yes Mum."

"And you entered into a wager?" Her son was too young to be gambling!

"Yes Mum."

"And you won the wager." What would she have done if he lost? And what exactly did he have to do to win?

"Yes Mum."

"And the forfeit was a ride in his plane… which can make it to Wutai and back." Was this the Planet helping them?

"Yes Mum."

Raisa swallowed, rubbing at her eyes. Only her son… "Let's go see this man," she said eventually. It was the chance she had been looking for. Even if this man would not honour the wager, he was a pilot, he should be able to tell them about others and they could see them. But if all went well… Oh she hoped… She already had the materia she needed and now the only question was how to get to Wutai. She felt as if time was running out and the two days they had spent in Rocket Town, while useful for her recovery and resupply were enough.

"After breakfast," Cloud entreated. He and Wolf had missed dinner and were hungry.

"Okay," Raisa smiled at her son. "After breakfast."

* * *

Sephiroth glanced back at the mountains behind him. He'd been walking for forty eight hours and was feeling rather tired. Even SOLDIERs needed sleep. The path had not been well marked but even in the dark his superior eyesight saw the markers. Even so he'd still made a few wrong turns. That was one thing he would be reporting to the Rocket Town Commander. They would have to re-mark the trail.

Looking out at the rolling, grassy hills he decided that he needed to rest and without further consideration he found a reasonably dry spot under a tree and rolled himself into his long coat, as comfortably as he could to sleep.

When he awoke it was about dawn and he allowed himself a small smirk. He was not the best of SOLDIER for nothing and the lethargy was gone. He ate a ration pack as he began to follow the sometimes faint trail towards Rocket Town. He'd have to eat properly once he got there but for now he did not have time to hunt. As he travelled every now and then he saw tracks. They weren't clear enough for him to judge who had travelled this way, but they were only a few days old at the most. That was enough. It was a safe assumption that no one else would have come through the mountains. Sephiroth picked up the pace. He was gaining on them, and now that they no longer had the advantage of terrain they were familiar with, he would make better time.

So long as they did not have someone waiting for them in Rocket Town, he had a chance of catching up. Though what exactly he would find, he did not know. And even once he found them, Sephiroth wasn't entirely sure what he could do. The Mansion was gone, Hojo wouldn't be getting his research back and it was possible, unlikely, but possible that there was a logical explanation. Sephiroth placed one hand over his heart as he moved quickly through the rolling hills. No matter what he reported back, he'd need strength.

* * *

Cid blinked one bleary eye as he sat at his table. His head throbbed and he held the heal of one hand to his other eye. A cup of tea steamed in front of the pilot and he'd taken a couple of half-hearted sips but the smell had left him nauseous. The curtains were still shut, and even the thin winter sun that was streaming in through the little gap was too much.

He groaned. What had possessed him to drink the entire bottle last night?

Oh yeah… the fact that it was real, genuine alcohol. Somehow the brat's mutt had found it. Well, maybe. But Cid couldn't imagine any other way the boy would have gotten his hands on that bottle. No one would have given it to him. He really should have drunk it slower though. And now he was paying the price.

It was a good thing he had nothing to do today.

"Mr. Highwind?"

Eh? Someone at his door? Why was anyone at his door?

"Mr. Highwind?" The second summons was accompanied by a rough bark.

Wait… Cid groaned again as the memory filtered through to him. He had promised that brat and his mutt something. "Che… Coming," he called, wincing when his own voice set his head throbbing again.

He rose and shuffled to the door, swinging it open just a little bit to avoid having the winter sun in his eyes. "Oh… it's you brat," his voice was more a moan than any greeting. "Come in," Cid invited moving back to the table and his tea. It was only after he'd taken another sip of tea that he realised the brat was not alone. A woman who could only be his mother entered with him and suddenly Cid recalled exactly what his place looked like. This was no place for a woman.

"Mr. Highwind?" the woman spoke.

"That's me," Cid replied.

"I understand you had a wager with my son," her voice was neutral and Cid grimaced. When a woman's voice was neutral, that was never good.

"I did."

"I gather from your current state, you are satisfied that the terms of the wager have been fulfilled?"

There wasn't a lot he could say to that. He looked over at the brat. The blond boy was standing beside his mother and his mutt was sitting there, with his tongue lolling out, his golden eyes fixed on Cid. That unblinking gaze was eerie and the blond man shivered and nodded his reply, scowling at the pain.

"And I believe the forfeit was a ride in your plane."

That had been the forfeit and with them here there was no point in denying it. Perhaps she was here to get something else. "It was."

"I want to go to Wutai."

"What?" The statement shocked him almost sober. This woman wanted to go to Wutai. To a war zone. The way she said it, gently, matter of factly just convinced him all the more that this wasn't a joke.

"I want to go to Wutai."

The statement made no further sense the second time.

Cid groaned as his headache was replaced with confusion. "Why?"

"Why is not important," the woman said easily. "Your forfeit with my son is for a ride in your plane. I'm prepared to pay you for my passage."

"I just can't up and…" Well… technically he could. The Tiny Bronco was his plane. Shinra just provided the fuel for it.

"So you are planning on avoiding your wager?" the woman asked, one pale eye brow raised to emphasise the question.

"No… but today isn't a good day."

"I can see that," she replied, her voice returning to neutral. "Yet today it must be. Are you not the best pilot in Shinra?"

"Best darn pilot."

"Then I fail to see the problem."

Did this woman not realise that one did not just fly into war territory? Even if he did, where was he supposed to land? "There is a war," Cid started, not really sure how to explain it.

"I am aware of this." Her voice remained calm.

"Oh god," he groaned. "Why do you want to go to Wutai?" Cid asked, stalling for time.

"That is not your concern. Can you take me to Wutai?"

Again the mutt's eyes narrowed and he was caught in their golden gaze. "I can."

"Will you take me to Wutai?"

No matter how eerie the mutt's gaze was, he wasn't answering that question without qualification. "For payment."

"And I am prepared to pay you for my passage."

Almost completely sober now Cid shook his head, careful not to set it pounding again. "No, you can pay for the fuel. But the payment can be taken care of by your son. Oi, Cloud."

Cloud looked over at him, his blue eyes acknowledging the call.

"You found the stash last night?"

"Yes."

"Where is it?"

"What? You want my son to pay you in alcohol?" For the first time there was real emotion in the woman's voice.

"Why not? In this town it's more valuable than gil."

"It's okay Mum," Cloud spoke before the argument got started. "It's not like we're going to be around to watch him get drunk."

The blonde woman sighed, conceding the point.

"Which stash?" Cloud asked ingeniously.

"What do you mean, brat?"

"Fenrir is worth his name," the boy said and the mutt barked. "We found more than one."

Cid laughed. "Tell me where they all are and I'll have you on the way to Wutai within the hour." He rose. "Help yourselves to some tea while I get the 'Bronco ready," he left the instruction as he headed out the back.

* * *

Raisa sighed. To say she had been surprised to see exactly who her son had made that wager with would have been an understatement. She had been shocked beyond all measure. Yet having memories of him was enough for her to have faith in his ability even with the effects of his obvious hangover and that's how she found herself sitting at the table, drinking tea.

No matter what she'd told Vincent, she didn't expect the Planet to help her. It had already done everything it could by sending her back. Even if this wasn't help, she'd take it. Maybe it wasn't help. Maybe it was just a natural extension of knowing the abilities of the people you were dealing with. Or instinct. Instinct honed by living two lives.

Whatever it was, it was telling her that they needed to leave Rocket Town. Now. The feeling was not yet so urgent that a few minutes either way would make a difference, but the sense of urgency was increasing as time trickled away. They had to leave soon. And in order to leave as fast as they could, she would not interfere while Highwind prepared his plane. Her memories were shockingly clear on what happened to those who got in the way.

And so, rather incongruously she sat with Cloud and drank the tea. Their few possessions were laid down beside them and Raisa had the small pouch with their gil tucked into her bodice. Fenrir sat beside Cloud his head resting on his forelegs. It was a nice little picture of domesticity if she over looked the bachelor mess in the rest of the room.

"It's ready," there was no hiding the note of sheer pleasure in Cid's voice as he came back into the room. The effects of his hang over seemed to have disappeared and he didn't even seem to mind the bright winter sun that was streaming in behind him.

"Thank you," Raisa said with a smile. "How much for the fuel?"

He named a figure and Raisa nodded, fishing out her gil. She had no idea how much fuel cost but the price seemed reasonable. She paused slightly when handing over the gil. "You can land in Wutai?"

Cid shook his head. "No, not in Wutai. I mean I could, but it would put you down in the middle of the Shinra camps. I don't think you want that."

Cloud hid a smile as he listened to Highwind speak. The man was almost respectful, his words lacking most of the colourful language he had displayed last night. Was the presence of a woman, of his mum, really having that much effect on the pilot? He held back a snicker when he realised it must be. Mind you, he had fully expected his Mum to give the man a dressing down the instant one crass word had come out of his mouth.

"That would not be advisable,"Raisa agreed.

"So I'll take you to the north and will land on the water. You can swim?"

"Well enough."

"Then that's that," Cid concluded. "Come one. Let's get going," he was almost like a little boy showing off his favourite toy. "The brat can tell me where the stashes are on the way."

* * *

Sephiroth paused on the last rise on the run into Rocket Town to catch his breath. It would not do for one of Shinra's Generals to be seen entering even a predominantly research out post such as this out of breath. The rumours would run rife if he let that happen and that would only annoy Hojo. An annoyed Hojo always meant trouble for him. It only took a minute or so for his breathing to come under control and after running his fingers through his hair he strode down the hill into the township. The odd sixth sense that all SOLDIERs had told him that Rocket Town would be the end of the chase, but what that actually meant he didn't know.

In practical terms it meant he'd be able to have a decent shower and food. While not fastidious, keeping his hair and body clean had been drilled into him and after spending time crossing the mountains and running over the grass lands, he was feeling particularly sweaty and dusty. Being clean would be nice. Not to mention finally being able to brush the tangles out of his hair. That was going to take a week.

Savagely, Sephiroth shook his head, bringing his attention back to the township. It was almost noon and the winter sun was out in full. It made everything seem shiny and new, even the tents that housed the troops and the research staff. A plane flew overhead and he lifted his gaze to it. It had the most outrageous paint job. Red paint was shockingly bright against the pale blue of the winter sky. There was in the way it flew a sense of joyous freedom and he suppressed a smile at the feeling. It was not appropriate. But as he watched the plane, an autogyro, his gaze lingering on it as it buzzed into the distance, he could not help the sense of peace that came over him. It was similar to the feeling he got when he thought of the picture he still carried and he watched the plane until it disappeared entirely.

It was not until much later that he realised the sense of the chase ended when the plane disappeared and it was then that he realised his target, whoever they were, had been on that plane. It remained a mystery why that made him feel so serene.

* * *

Raisa sat in the tiny, cramped cargo section of the Tiny Bronco. The plane really wasn't designed to carry passengers. It wasn't designed to carry much of anything except the pilot but they managed. Cloud had been excited at the beginning, wanting to know what everything did and the sensation of flight was rather disturbing but once they shifted from rising into travelling, it had evened out a bit. Thankfully none of them were travel sick. That would have been… inconvenient.

Once they'd settled, though she didn't like it, Mr. Highwind began questioning Cloud, asking where the stashes were. While she didn't like the content of the conversation, she was surprised at the adult way her boy spoke. He was only ten but he had definitely grown up while she wasn't looking. He gave directions like anyone born in the mountains, referring to trees and other land marks easily which left their pilot rather frustrated but eventually they seemed to sort things out. She hid a smile. It would be… justice if Mr. Highwind couldn't find any of the alcohol Cloud had discovered.

After they spoke, Cloud looked out the tiny porthole, taking in the seemingly never ending expanse of water. The ocean was fascinating and Raisa smiled indulgently. He might have grown up, but he was still her baby boy. They flew in silence for a while before Cid began to talk.

"You know, I probably could land in Wutai but I'd rather not take the chance. I don't think you want me to explain how I got a ninja star embedded in the 'Bronco."

The blonde woman nodded serenely towards their pilot in response. No, this was not the time she wanted that happening. Landing on the water would suit them fine. It was winter but they'd dry out well enough on the shore.

"So why do you want to go to Wutai?"

Ah… the question came up again. Given his importance in the future, Raisa supposed he deserved an answer. "There are things I must do there."

Cid snorted. Raisa let it slide though Wolf turned his head, fixing golden eyes on Mr. Highwind in a gaze that was particularly intense. "I know that may seem odd to you, Mr. Highwind," Raisa continued. "There are times when it seems odd to me. But it is the truth." Oh, it was more than the truth. It was essential that she be in Wutai. She wasn't entirely sure she knew how she could get the Wutai people to listen to her, but her future self had been told something in the Lifestream. The memory was tinged with green but it was important and it was about the Lady of Wutai. Raisa just hoped it was about the current Lady of Wutai. In the Lifestream, sometimes it was hard to tell.

"Eh, I shouldn't be asking," Cid said, pulling out a cigarette. "It's probably better if I don't know." He stuck a match.

Raisa reached out, dousing the flame of his match with her fingertips. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't smoke," she said firmly, plucking the matches from his suddenly slack grip.

"What?!"

"There is only limited ventilation and the smoke would be quite invasive," she replied.

"What!?"

Raisa did not give up the matches and from where he was watching the ocean, Cloud snickered. Even wolf seemed amused at Cid's discomfort.

That killed conversation for a while, until Cid announced that land was sighted. That resulted in a mad scramble from Cloud to at least poke his head into the cockpit to see. He was disappointed when it turned out to be just a smudge on the horizon. Soon after Highwind adjusted their course. "It's still a while yet," he announced as they swung north, "so don't get too excited," he added, giving Cloud a tight grin.

The blond boy probably didn't even hear because even though the land was just a smudge, he was fascinated. Raisa watched for a few moments before she turned her attention back to their Pilot.

"Mr. Highwind," she said, not completely sure what she wanted to tell him.

"Hmm?" He didn't seem to be upset about the cigarette now.

"For the moment, Shinra is paying your bills, aren't they?"

"Yeah, mostly just the fuel because I do reconnaissance."

"I want you to remember something then, for the future." Raisa ignored the way Cloud stiffened. While he was fascinated by the passing landscape, he wasn't so completely lost that he did not pay attention to his surroundings. Even when his surroundings were so limited. She felt a flash of pride. Such skill would serve him well for the future.

"Shinra might be paying the bills now, but they will only pay them for so long as the project suits their interest. They say they want flight technology now, they might even say space but eventually that will not suit. When that time comes, I want you to remember something Mr. Highwind, there are those in this world who appreciate your skills, those who know what it means to have only one desire in life and the will to risk it all for that desire. When they take the Highwind from you, take back your desire and bring it to those who share your passion."

"Wha..?" Cid had no idea what to say to that.

"Just remember it," Raisa advised.

"If you say so," Cid dismissed it but deep in his mind he heard. He already knew Shinra only funded those projects that gained them some advantage. But the airforce and the space program helped them with the war, there was no reason for them to ditch them. The woman had seemed sane enough but he wasn't so sure now.

It didn't matter, in a few hours he'd be free of her. And then she could go and kill herself on Wutai. It would be a shame about the lad but while he seemed sensible, he showed a regrettable tendency to follow his mother. At his age it was understandable but it would be sad.

A couple of hours later, Cid brought them in closer to the coast. While Raisa would be the first to admit she didn't know the first thing about invasions, she could tell that the coast was very uninviting. The ocean crashed up against cliffs that rose in sheer faces for 50 to 100m. Cloud might be okay scaling that but she would not be, nor would wolf. On the top of the cliffs was jungle. It didn't peter out as it approached the cliff face but instead ended in an abrupt drop. There was a small difference in size between the trees on the cliff verge and those further back but not significant and perhaps the undergrowth was not as thick for a few meters because of the wind and salt but the forest was thick enough.

"Yeah, there's a reason Shinra are attacking from the south," Cid answered the unasked question. "The whole coast line is like this, even on the other side of the island. But there are a couple of tiny coves big enough for a transport but not for an army."

She nodded. The notion of swimming had seemed reasonable but now she was feeling her layers of clothing and already feeling her limbs weighed down with them when they were wet. The water would be cold and once they made sure, the wind would cut through them. Raisa shook her head. She could not think of that. They had no choice. They had to go to Wutai and it had to be Wutai, not Shinra controlled Wutai.

After a bit of searching Cid exclaimed triumphantly, before tugging the controls and sending them into a steep rise. "Standard procedure for snooping. Come in high and the ninja, if they are around, will target you the instant you are in range. 'Cept, the propeller's give us enough downdraft that they can't hit us." He said the last with a grin.

"And if there are ninja?" Cloud asked.

"Then we go to the next cove," Cid replied. "But Shinra haven't tried landing troops here, not even a surprise attack so I doubt Wutai thinks much about defence here. They are occupied down south."

He lowered the autogyro and no attack came and with a grin, and a very skilful bit of piloting he pushed them into the cove as it if was the easiest thing in the world. The cove was just a tiny half-moon opening with a bit of beach. The cliff down to it was less sheer but still uninviting and within the cove the waves were gentler. "Open the bottom hatch and drop your gear out," Cid instructed and they did that. There was nothing breakable in their gear and while Cid could get low enough to drop their small packs, he could not get low enough that they could jump to the ground and they did not have enough rope to shimmy down.

Their packs sent little puffs of sand into the air when they dropped and Cloud put one hand on Wolf, restraining him as the animal considered the drop. Then, with more careful manoeuvring Cid pushed the autogyro back, easing the little plane out over the water. "This is as close as I can get you," he announced finally.

With more than a touch of trepidation Raisa eyed the water. It looked deep enough and while there was no ice, it looked cold enough too. "Thank you, Mr. Highwind," she said finally. "You may think this is insane or suicidal but it is essential and I could not have done it without you, so you have my thanks." There wasn't much more she could say and the blond man looked uncomfortable so Raisa nodded one last formal good-bye and jumped. Cloud and wolf followed.

Cid shook his head as the three of them plunged into the water and began flailing for land. As the woman had said, they could swim well enough but their level of skill was definitely that of their hometown. Folks from the mountain didn't swim that well, not like those from Junon. He shook his head, bemused at the turn his thoughts had taken and watched them. He owed them at least that much to see that they made it to land safely.

Eventually he pulled up, sending the Tiny Bronco into a vertical rise and turning it east. They had been most unusual passengers. The woman's words insane but stuck through with a note of deep truth and the boy was a lively lad, bright eyed yet somehow serene. As Cid flicked a few switches on the Bronco, sending it forward towards home, he could not help but wonder if he'd ever see them again.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Restores aren't available in Rocket Town but for my purposes they are.


	9. Chapter 9

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 9  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

Raisa shivered. After living thirteen winters in Nibelheim she never thought she'd feel cold in another part of the world. She was wrong. Wutai was cold! They'd managed to make it to land after jumping from the plane, though the waters were shocking with their chill. Thankfully, while biting, the cove protected them from the worst of the waves and wind and once they struggled up the beach, they had huddled together at the edge of the sand. There had been a tiny part of the rock scooped out, too small to be called a good cave, but large enough to provide them some shelter and with the drift wood that littered the beach they had been able to start a small fire and properly dry out.

They were warm enough that night but the next day Raisa knew they had to move. There was always the chance that when Cid Highwind returned to Rocket Town he would be questioned. He would have no reason to keep their movements or identities secret and there was every chance that Shinra would order him to fly someone to Wutai to follow them. It depended a bit on how pedantic they were being.

So the next day they had hoisted their packs onto their shoulders and made the climb up out of the cove. Once they'd gotten under the trees, it had been marginally warmer, mostly because they were out of the wind, but the trees had their own dangers. Several times wolf, or Fenrir as Cloud was now calling him, had jumped in front of them, growling savagely at something Raisa couldn't detect and once Cloud had shot… something. She had no idea what it was, but her boy's hand had been steady when he'd fired and as Vincent had taught him, he cleaned his gun properly that night, making sure that everything was as it should be.

They'd walked for a day or so and even though the Wutai capital was south, there had been a tug on her mind that said go north so she followed it. Cloud actually asked her that first night why they were heading away from the capital and she'd tried to explain but he had simply nodded at her, his blue eyes understanding in the firelight. Fenrir had barked his agreement and that had made the small knot of worry in her gut dissipate. She _thought_ she was doing the right thing, but Cloud and wolf were far more in tune with the planet than she was, and if their instinct's had no objection to heading north, then that is what she would do.

It had taken another five days before they found it; an estate, high in the mountains, completely remote and protected by sheer cliffs. The instant Raisa laid eyes on it, she knew that was her destination but with it in sight, she pulled up and they set up camp two hours walk back along the faint path they had made.

They couldn't camp forever. Raisa knew that and their activities were eating into their supplies but they had enough for several more weeks and Raisa would wait as long as she could. Something was meant to happen here, just she didn't quite know when. Wolf hunted for them, bringing back game and after the first night in their new campsite, when Cloud and Wolf had brought back the carcass of some black cat they were not disturbed by other predators.

On the day she had enhanced Wolf, there had been an instantaneous change. His eyes glowed a brilliant intelligent golden, and after the Mako treatment his healing had been improved, but over the weeks of travel further changes had become evident. Fenrir's claws were slightly longer and his teeth seemed whiter and sharper. He'd grown too so that where he once stood at Cloud's hip, now he stood at her boy's chest. No wild wolf could compare. She'd seen him fight, so she knew how savage Fenrir could be, but she had also seen him with Cloud each night, playing and licking and sleeping as her boy cuddled into him. It was a comfort to her to know that he had such a loyal guardian.

So they waited, even though they weren't sure what they were waiting for. Raisa didn't return to the estate but each day Cloud did and each day he reported that nothing had changed. The guards still patrolled but all was quiet. His former forays into the mountains around Nibelheim served him well here though it did take Cloud a few days to get the hang of climbing trees. Thereafter he was like a squirrel and every time Raisa saw him, scampering about on the worryingly thin limbs of some tree she felt her heart clench. But Cloud was surefooted and agile, moving through the still dense trees quickly while his wolf ghosted along the ground beneath him. She was confident they would not get caught and that he would not fall.

Each day she practiced with the materia that they had. She cast 'Restore' on almost everything she could and discovered that it worked on _anything._ She knew it worked on people because her back had been healed and from that she figured it would work on animals but she had not expected it to work on plants and even to a limited extent on water. The effect on plants was interesting and she made sure she returned to the plant she had used it on each day. The materia had pushed the plant into its spring colouring and in the middle of winter, that was not healthy, so each day she gave it a little boost so that it would survive. The effect on water was almost as interesting. She'd tried it on a small stagnant pool that had been almost frozen beneath one of the great trees. The water had become clear, but the pollutants that still hung suspended in it remained. It could not be considered fit for drinking. The experiment though made Raisa wonder if there was not another materia that might be used to clean the water entirely. If there was, that could be a useful trick to know.

Water wasn't a problem. Wutai, like Nibelheim was blessed with an abundance of small streams, all carrying clear crisp water. The only problem they faced was collecting it. Well, that was one problem. Keeping it out of their camp site and shelter was another. As was keeping all the bugs away!

Nibelheim got its share of bugs, mostly in the summer as the chill of winter drove them into dormancy. But Wutai! It was cold but the bugs were still out in force. Granted some of it could have been due to the warmth of their fire, but not all of it. The entire place was infested! It was a daily battle against them and Raisa realised quite savagely that she did not like bugs. There were even a few she incinerated without remorse after realising that their bright colours most likely meant poisonous. Those and spiders. She felt absolutely no shame each time she raised the fire materia against them, casting tiny fire spells to get rid of them. She also used the fire material to keep the little fire they risked going. While it didn't seem to snow in Wutai, the way it would in Nibelheim, it was still bitterly cold and they needed that fire.

As she used each materia, she could feel them becoming stronger and when she looked into the tiny orbs, Raisa almost swore that the green had become deeper, somehow seeming to stretch further. It was odd but comforting in a way, as if the Planet was reaching out to embrace each materia.

She gave Cloud instructions to go back to the estate each day and to watch carefully. He could not get caught, that was paramount but she had to know what was going on. Faithfully Cloud watched each day, and reported back to her at the end of each day.

Three and a half long weeks later, everything changed. Cloud came running back to their camp with his eyes alight. It was about noon and the instant Raisa saw him she began gathering up the few items that had been spread around. They didn't expect to be found this deep into the forest, but she had made sure that they did not spread out just in case they did have to run.

"There's something," Cloud reported. "Everyone is rushing around and there was some screaming."

Raisa frowned. She'd expected that, but she had hoped that Cloud would not have to hear it. "It's alright," she made sure her voice was calm. "It's not anything bad," she reassured Cloud. "You'll see when we get there."

Cloud looked confused. How could screaming be good? But he couldn't ask his mum for further details because the moment her pack was tied shut, she had hoisted it on to her shoulder, indicating that he should grab his own and they were off.

She didn't know how long the screaming had been going on for. Cloud had left to observe just after breakfast and assuming that he hadn't run, then, factoring in travel time to the estate and back, it was conceivable that it had been going on all night. That would be normal; normal in the way that it always seemed that children liked to make themselves known at the most inconvenient time. As a result, Raisa made for the estate with all the speed she could muster, running where she could through the dense jungle. It was on that trip that she learned exactly how fit her boy was.

Cloud easily kept pace with her, running with a smooth fluid motion, jumping and leaping and occasionally taking to the trees. Fenrir accompanied him, the large wolf a silent shadow. She, on the other hand, was not nearly as graceful and after a while her heart hammered in her chest and her breath was sharply laboured. Cloud and Fenrir could have been out for an afternoon stroll, they were breathing hard, but only so much as you might get if you ran from their house to the inn in Nibelheim. They probably could have run that way for hours.

Thankfully it was only a two hour walk to the Estate so they reached it about forty five minutes after they left their camp. Raisa stood for a few moments, looking down at the large house, one hand resting on a tree as she panted, gulping down air as fast as she could.

And then she heard it. A scream cut their air. It was drawn out and tortured and the blonde woman shuddered.

"That's not good," Raisa muttered, her blue eyes narrowing as she looked down at the house.

"Mum?" Cloud asked, his voice worried.

"That's not normal," she told him.

"But?" The question was obvious, considering what she had said earlier.

"Let's find out what's wrong," she replied, beginning to walk down to the Estate.

* * *

It was almost surreal. There should have been guards. There _were_ guards, they were just concentrating on something other than guarding at the moment.

Cloud, Raisa and Fenrir walked purposely through the gates and then into the house. It was not like a Nibelheim house. Most of the corridors were on the outside forming long sweeping walkways that were covered by the roof. It made moving around interesting and easy though they did encounter a few people, most of them wore the uniform of servants and skirted around them with wide frightened eyes.

Raisa paid no attention to them. Now that she was here, she moved with a purpose. The screams came periodically but she was honing in on them. As they got closer they encountered more people but no one stopped them. The look on her face caused most to shrink back. She made it to outside the room where the woman was screaming. Raisa didn't understand Wutainese but she didn't need to. She knew the tone. It was quiet but worry was thick in every word.

Even in the time she had been within earshot the screams had been growing weaker. The woman making them was tired. It had been going on too long and if it wasn't ended soon, both she and the child she laboured to bear would die. That was what Raisa was here for. This time, the Lady of Wutai would not die.

"I can save her," Raisa announced firmly, hoping someone would understand but confident that the meaning would carry across the language barrier. Cloud stood slightly behind her, looking around with wide blue eyes. Fenrir stood with Cloud, close enough to touch her boy. The wolf's golden eyes could not show curiosity but they did show wariness. In this new situation, the wolf was ready to run if that's what was called for. Raisa knew he'd take Cloud with him and she was comforted.

There was a babble in Wutainese and Raisa shook her head, blonde tresses tossing around her face. "I can save her," she repeated, gesturing towards the door where she knew the Lady of Wutai lay behind.

"You can save the Lady?" The question was harsh. "What would some blonde bitch know about healing?"

"What does it matter? I can save her."

"You? You are most likely some Shinra spy."

Raisa smiled serenely. She had expected this to be honest. "What does it matter?" She replied. "I am here and you can arrest me. But if you do that, she will die. So will her child. I can save them. I want to save them."

The man who had spoken looked at Raisa carefully, evaluating, judging. It was difficult to believe her words. The blonde woman didn't smell but her clothes were wrinkled and rumpled as if she'd been wearing them for a long time. The boy's clothes were the same. Her hair was tied back into a scraggly pony tail and was knotted. She looked like she'd come in from the jungle, which, he realised belatedly is probably what had happened. There was nothing special about the way she looked. But there was about her a sense of assured confidence. Whatever else this woman was, she was courageous enough to enter enemy territory and to stand proud. Even now they could cut her down without effort and she seemed to know that but she showed no fear.

He was Lord Godo's Chief Advisor. He did not trust this blonde woman but he knew he would not be able to look his Lord in the face if there any chance of saving his wife and he did not take it.

"So save her." If the Lady of Wutai lived, then they could deal with the blonde later. If she died, then the blonde would also die.

Raisa nodded and motioned for Cloud to stay put as she entered the room, her boots tapping on the wooden floor. At least if Cloud remained outside, Fenrir might have the chance to grab him if things went wrong. But nothing was going to go wrong, she told herself firmly as she pulled out the materia she had brought with her. If she ever saw Vincent again she'd have to thank him for insisting that she buy the Restore.

The situation was worse than she thought. There was blood on almost everything and all attention was focused on a small woman in the centre. She was gasping and around her various other women scurried. The activity seemed pointless and Raisa wasn't sure what it was for. She had been present at the birth of other children in Nibelheim and it was usually a straight forward affair. The men were banished to the Inn and the women took care of the birth and clean up. Simple, easy and efficient. This seemed anything but.

It probably started out that way but it had deteriorated. It had gone on too long and the Lady of Wutai was too weak. Raisa raised the materia and cast. Restore was a simple enough spell and she let the power of the magic wash over the Lady of Wutai. It seemed to bring back some of her strength but it was not enough and Raisa cast the charm again and again, forcing energy into the small woman to restore her waning strength.

The guards who had been standing at her back fell back after a moment when it was obvious that the magic was helping their lady. The other women began to calm down as well and resume their jobs.

"Push, my Lady, push!" The encouragement might have been in Wutai but it was easy enough to understand.

Half way through Raisa felt the materia in her hand change. It was hot, as a result of her pouring her energy into it but she could feel it grow. It deepened. That was the only real way to describe it and the next time she cast, the charm was different. Energy sufficed the Lady of Wutai but unlike the other charms Raisa had cast, this continued and she could feel the drain of energy from her but she did not let the spell go.

The Lady of Wutai screamed again. But it was not like the tortured screams of earlier. It contained pain but it had a note of purpose and the black haired woman gasped and screamed again. This time it was words and though Raisa didn't understand, it didn't matter. The Lady of Wutai was getting stronger.

And then another cry joined hers. Thin and high but incomprehensibly beautiful.

The small green materia in Raisa's hand jumped, pulling more energy from her diminished reserves, casting another charm, this time at the small red baby that had finally been delivered. The wash of magic was deeper and stronger and Raisa let it feed from her without hindrance. The last thing she saw was the Lady of Wutai smiling down at the baby in her arms and after that everything went black.

* * *

Raisa heard breathing before she became fully aware. She recognised the rhythm and she held back a smile as she awoke fully. Cloud and Fenrir. Their breath formed a pattern she was intimately familiar with and it was comforting. She was warm, and beneath her there was something soft. The covers were heavy, pressing into her but allowing movement. She could almost imagine this was a lazy summer day in Nibelheim but it wasn't. Those days were forever gone. Slowly she opened her eyes and was surprised to find herself looking up at a tan ceiling. Wooden beams criss-crossed the room, the wood rich and dark and well kept.

She squirmed, reaching up to push the covers down, sitting up as she opened her eyes. Cloud and Fenrir were sleeping beside her. The wolf looked comfortable, and the warmth from him emanated through the blankets. Cloud was hunched over at her side, his head resting on his arms and his breathing even. One hand reached out towards her and one was fisted in wolf's thick fur. He had obviously been sitting there until he fell asleep and she was touched by the gesture.

"So you live to see another day, woman."

Raisa vaguely recognised the voice as the man who had spoken to her outside the birthing room. "It would seem I have," she replied, shifting slightly. The man was near the door, kneeling and as he looked up he put a scroll down. The blonde wasn't sure of the cultural requirements so she nodded her head at him. "Thank you," she added.

He was silent for a while and Raisa made no other conversation. She looked over at Cloud, pulling him closer to her, so that she could stroke his hair. His blond spikes were soft and still almost downy and she enjoyed the quiet moment. She didn't know how long it would be until the next one.

The man broke first. "What do you want woman?" The question was the obvious one. "No enemy willingly walks into a war zone without wanting something."

She looked over at him, her face amused. Did he really think she would give up the advantage so easily? "I want an audience with Lord Godo."

He made a sharp intake of breath. The impudence of the woman!

"It's not like I want a private audience," Raisa continued with a little smile. "His guards may be present so that if I'm some sort of spy he will be protected. But that is all I want and considering the service I have done for Wutai, I don't think it's much to ask."

"Nor do I," a new voice spoke and Raisa turned towards it. On the other side of the room there was a bamboo screen. She could see the outline of a figure behind it. From the shape she figured it was male and seemed to have a regal bearing. The voice was sure and held a note of command. There was the impression of motion and suddenly the screens were raised.

"My Lord!" The other man gasped and from the corner of her eyes Raisa saw him bow, putting his head to the floor.

She would not bow but she did politely incline her head to the Lord of Wutai.

He was a powerful man. His hair was long and stroked back into a knot. The temples were just turning grey and she almost laughed at his eye-brows. They were pronounced yet somehow they went with his mustash and pointy beard. He wore purple though Raisa could tell the vest was not his only symbol of power and on the battle field it would be abandoned. He lead from the front but for now he knelt, looking down at a wrapped bundle that rested in his lap, his expression soft and almost disbelieving. She knew that look. Her Damian had worn it when Cloud was born. It was the look of all new Father's and she felt her heart go out to the Lord of Wutai when she thought what he had lost the previous time. His grief would have destroyed his focus on the war. Now, it was easy to understand how Wutai had lost.

"I owe the life of my beloved and son to you. It would be impolite if I did not hear you out."

Raisa gulped. She had not really expected to see Lord Godo for quite some time so this was surprising. But she knew what she wanted and she knew what she had to offer. This was the entire reason she had left Nibelheim after all. This was the plan her future self had conceived in the Lifestream and she would carry it out. Her son would not go through that future again.

"I came to…" she paused. How best to say this? "I came to bargain with you," Raisa started again.

"Bargain?" The Lord of Wutai seemed surprised.

"The war," Raisa continued. "I can give you enhanced soldiers."

"What!?" The advisor gasped raising his head, his voice showing pure shock. Lord Godo was more restrained but she could sense his surprise as well.

"You?" While the question was mocking she was not offended.

"I realise it seems unlikely," she said, still stroking Cloud's hair. "I come from Nibelheim, a village I'm sure you have never heard of. It was the place Shinra developed their SOLDIERs and I know how they did it."

"And you will enhance my people?"

"For a price."

"Sir! There is no proof!" The Advisor was almost too quick to object.

"There is every proof," Raisa retaliated, not even bothering to turn to face the Advisor. Lord Godo was the one with power and he was the only one she needed to answer to but no doubt he would want proof. "The wolf before you is enhanced," she added, gesturing towards the sleeping animal. "Gold eyes that glow, strength beyond any other wolf, endurance, healing, everything the enhanced SOLDIERs you face possess."

"We will test that in time," Godo said. "What is your price?"

"I have six conditions, though some of them are more requirements," Raisa said.

"Name them."

This was proceeding rather more easily than she thought it would but Raisa was aware that no deal had been made yet. The Lord of Wutai might not agree. She took a deep breath and continued. "No matter what further arrangements you may yet make with Shinra, I am never revealed. Never."

"That's one."

"It is. The second is that I will not enhance anyone under sixteen. The process is brutal and I will not inflict it upon a minor."

"That is sensible. Go on."

"I will not enhance anyone from Avalanche, nor will I reveal the technique to them."

There was another hiss of breath from the door and Raisa concluded that he was one advisor who supported Avalanche's presence on Wutai. It mattered very little to her. They were necessary for the future but not in the way they had been. She had no plans to change them. They could change themselves or they would die. It was that simple and they were replaceable.

"That is three conditions. What are the others?"

"One condition and two provisos," Raisa said. She could not read Lord Godo's tone so she opted to make the best of it. He was the leader of his country. He would listen to the whole proposal and judge it then, not before. "The last condition is more a statement. I will enhance my son when he is old enough." Her eyes were soft as she allowed herself to glance down at Cloud. He still slept soundly and she was grateful for that. No doubt he had been awake as long as he could before he succumbed to sleep.

"At my expense no doubt."

"A minimal cost," she replied, not missing the almost jovial tone in Lord Godo's quip. "The last two are not conditions, but are provisos. The first is relatively simple. I need someone from Midgar. It will most likely be two someones but I cannot do anything without them. And the second concerns Avalanche."

"What is it?"

"It may be presumptuous of me but it would seem to me that if Avalanche are your allies, then they should be fighting. Not here, not on Wutai. You have your pride and your forces are enough to take out Shinra by themselves. But Avalanche would make a fine strike force on the mainland."

"How many can you enhance?"

"That would depend on how much Mako you can get."

"How long does it take to enhance?"

"For the initial effects are almost instantaneous, a day or so but further effects take longer. I cannot make you SOLDIERs of the power of Sephiroth, Genesis or Angeal but I can give you those who can match the rest of the Shinra's SOLDIERs. For all their power, the Generals are just men and without support, they can only do so much."

"Do not speak tactics to me," Lord Godo said in a warning tone but Raisa could tell he was interested in her proposal, despite the liberties she had taken in her words. "You give me much to think on woman," the Lord of Wutai said after an intense moment of scrutiny. She felt like his black eyes were weighing her but Raisa managed to keep her face serene.

"I'm sure I have," she replied calmly.

"What of the materia you brought here?" The question was abrupt.

She blinked suddenly. She had intended to give them to Wutai even though she only had the most basic of the orbs. Already they had proven useful. "I will give them to you, though I would suggest you always keep an immature one here."

"Why?" There was a quirk to one of Lord Godo's eyebrows that bespoke volumes.

"Only immature materia can divide."

There was more than one gasp from behind her and Raisa was not surprised to see that here were more advisors there now. She hadn't heard them but that wasn't important. "I do not know much about materia," she said easily, "just what they told me when I bought it."

"You would appear to know more than us," Lord Godo admitted. "And you have given me much to think on."

Raisa nodded at that.

"I will give you an answer shortly. For now, you have my most profound thanks and the hospitality of my house. And for the life of my wife and son, you will always have that."

The silence was shattering and Raisa was slightly confused until Lord Godo gently put his child aside and bowed. This was big. Backwater, ex-servant of Kalm's Mayor, country bumpkin of a woman she may be but she knew that the Lord of a nation did _not_ bow to a woman such as herself. The Advisors at the door were equally stunned and it was Raisa's turn for her breath to catch in her throat. The hand that was resting on Cloud's shoulder bunched the fabric of his clothes and as best as she was able to she returned the bow.

"Lord Godo," Raisa began in a dry voice after taking a moment to organise her thoughts. "Their lives are their own. It would have been against the code of any woman to let another die in childbirth without doing all I could. I am a mother and I know how much every child needs their mother. That is all I have done, given Lady Yuffie and her brother, their mother." It might have been more diplomatic just to accept his thanks, but with what her actions would cost Wutai, the truth would be a far better balm for her consciousness. If they took her offer, she didn't know _how_ many more lives would be lost, but it would be many. Shinra wouldn't let it go, and once they embarked upon this course, Wutai could not let it go. They had survived the first war, barely, living as a tourist attraction but losing their pride. They would either survive this or die. She may not have given the Lady of Wutai and her son much of a life at all.

The Lord of Wutai rose, his black eyes sharp as he examined her for signs of falsehood. It was true she had used the situation and that didn't need to be pointed out to anyone. But it was equally true that she had saved the Lady and her child. Every one of the Birthing Servants was adamant that his Lady was beyond their ability to save. Yet she had been saved, by this foreign woman who sat with her own son and brought him the most outrageous proposal.

Assuming she could do what she said she could, which would have to be proven, was it too much to dream? The court knew the war was not going well. They had been throwing monsters at the Shinra forces for the last part of the Autumn Campaign yet the SOLDIERs seemed to shrug them off. But enhanced… that was a different matter. If they could match the normal SOLDIERs on the field, then Lord Godo had no doubts of the ability of his warriors. They would _find_ a way to match the three no one could face. As the woman had said, they were just men and determined troops could take down even the toughest of men. And his ninja were determined.

But it was a whole new level of war. He could already see in his Advisors those who were cautious and those who wanted to go ahead. They hadn't thought through all the implications yet. If they went this way, if she could make enhanced beings then Shinra would fight them all the harder. But Shinra would also be thrown. They would be hunting for a spy, a traitor when none existed because the knowledge was here. That was a part of what made this offer, if true, so tempting.

He needed to think, to meditate and the woman thankfully seemed to realise that. She wasn't pushing for an immediate answer. She wasn't desperate for something. Which actually assured him all the more. She knew what she was offering, what she was capable of and it was up to them now. With a final nod at the woman the screen was lowered and he picked up his son. The tiny bundle of warmth had slept through the entire interview, much like the woman's son but the Lord of Wutai knew newborns. Soon enough he would want his mother and it would be a joy to see them. Silently he rose and padded out of the room catching the gentle way the woman shook her son to wakefulness.

* * *

Of course it didn't end there. With an offer such as the one Raisa had made to Wutai there was proof required and after a day or so she was obliged to provide that proof. Cloud helped put Fenrir through his paces and the wolf was remarkably accepting when they carefully parted his thick winter coat and nicked his skin. The wound healed almost instantaneously leading to startled gasps from most of those gathered. It confirmed her offer though. Glowing eyes could have somehow been counterfeited, as could the size and strength if they had just found a particularly large wild wolf and trained him. It was impossible to duplicate advanced healing without it being the real thing and Raisa had not been allowed her materia for that test.

Avalanche didn't like her conditions. But she never saw them and apparently the Lord of Wutai eventually got tired of their politicking and gave them an ultimatum; either help Wutai fight or leave. Avalanche grumbled but conceded the point and orders were given on the mainland and their forces began moving. Yet they wanted the secret of enhancement. Some of Avalanche were enhanced, but it was not something that could be duplicated and a few troops they had had been stolen from Shinra and brainwashed. Raisa didn't think about the implications of that too closely. It wasn't her concern and the Avalanche her boy had joined was a very different entity.

She talked further with Lord Godo and was formally introduced to his wife, the Lady of Wutai. Lady Kasumi was a vibrant woman and after spending a few days confined after childbirth she was mostly recovered. Her near brush with death all but forgotten as she fussed over her new son. She was a fair mother though, and her daughter received her own share of fussing. All of Wutai celebrated. While inheritance could have fallen to the Lady Yuffie Kisaragi, they felt more secure with the son the Lord had given them.

His naming ceremony was a week after his birth and Raisa was invited to attend. She did, though she was confused by the proceedings and it wasn't until afterwards that someone told her what the babe's name was. With all the ceremony being conducted in Wutainese she had no idea what the final decision was. They had chosen the name Kichirou because he was lucky to be alive.

It was another week until Lord Godo gave her an answer. It was what she expected. They agreed. Their talks over the last two weeks had been productive. Cloud would be educated here in Wutai with the Lady Yuffie. Raisa would join the Lady Kasumi's entourage. She would become unofficially an advisor on eastern culture and that would suit everyone. It would give her the run of the royal palace which was where they would enhance the soldiers Lord Godo picked out. Raisa gave the Lord of Wutai details of the one she needed from Midgar and that was that. She heard nothing about the mission except that Avalanche was involved somehow. A wing of the palace in the capital was being converted as per her specifications already and by the time the spring campaign was upon them, Wutai would field enhanced ninjas in the battle against Shinra. There were changes happening all over Wutai though the winter snows hid many.

The move back to the capital was conducted in easy stages. While the Lady Kasumi had healed, it was still winter and she was still weak and no one wanted to see her or the newborn first son of Wutai take sick.

The materia Raisa had provided were already in use and many were working to master them. They like the enhanced ninjas would be unleashed in the spring, though stashes of newborn materia were being carefully hidden in strategic places. Raisa only knew this vaguely as she settled into her new life. From now on, everything she remembered would be different and when word reached her that they had successfully captured the one she needed, she felt a new fear come upon her.

The woman… girl, was essential. She could not enhance without her but would she be willing? She had just been pulled forcibly from Midgar, away from what she had known. She may not be willing to forgive them for that. And if she wasn't, was Raisa ruthless enough to force her will upon the girl? Was Lord Godo?

It was a telling moment for her when Raisa realised her answer was yes. She would force it upon the girl if she had to. She would regret it and the Planet would cry but she would do it. For her son, she would do anything and one child, no matter how important would not stand against her. Many years ago she had been sickened by the thought of killing a child Sephiroth but that was when she was naïve, when she was new. Now that thought was not as horrifying as it had been and the thought of forcing one child to comply was nothing.

She had come from the future with this plan. She would change the future. Thousands had died in the future, but thousands would die in this present. Neither path was free of blood and though the blood would be on her hands Raisa steeled herself against the pain. This was for Cloud. This was always for Cloud and so long as he was safe, she'd drown in blood if that's what it took.

Looking out at the capital of Wutai with its terracotta rooves and gravel and paved streets and idyllic streams Raisa smiled. The path began here.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title:** A Mother's Love  
 **Chapter:** 10  
 **Author:** Jade Tatsu

* * *

Tifa looked up at the sky. The stars were so clear tonight and she could feel the temperature plummeting from where she sat near the well.

She had needed this and had crept out, coming here to just quietly look up at the stars.

"Cloud," the name left her lips like a whisper of air and the brunette frowned. Why had she said his name?

He'd disappeared at the beginning of winter, with his mum, the same day that the Mansion burned to the ground. No one had outright said that Mrs. Strife was responsible, but no one had any doubt that she was. And by association her son was guilty as well. Speculation was running rife through the village as to what had happened, especially when Shinra sent one of their First Class SOLDIERs to investigate, and not just any SOLDIER, they'd sent one of the Generals.

On the day of the fire there had been concern, but when the sun set that concern had turned to accusation and by the time the General arrived, the entire town was sure she was guilty. Yet they didn't say that. And Tifa wasn't so sure.

Cloud had been… well, she couldn't call him a friend but he was one of the few people in the village she liked.

He was always so serious and he never tried to impress her. In fact, she was more than a little bit impressed with him. Zangan had looked at him once, assessing Cloud when his mother had asked the martial artist if he could teach her boy some moves and he'd shaken his head. He never gave a reason why he would not teach Cloud but he had told her, later that day, that she should watch him. Watch the way he moves, and turns, see the way the land responds to him. And she had. Cloud had moved with a grace that left her breathless and Tifa had never had the courage to ask him where he had learned that.

And then there was his wolf. Everyone in Nibelhiem knew the Nibel Wolves, knew they ran in packs and knew how to defend themselves from one. Yet Cloud was different. He raised one as a pup, taught it to be loyal to him and ran with the wolf all over the mountain. She was more than a little bit jealous of that.

Her lips creased in a smile as she realised what was wrong. She missed Cloud. She never spoke with him, never interacted with him much but now that he was gone she missed him. He'd been a constant in her life and now he was missing.

He was the only one who knew the truth about her Mum, who had helped her with the grief and she'd never really gotten to say thank you. The way life in the village was, she probably would never see him again, and would never get to thank him. He was wherever he was, pursued by Shinra and she was… stuck. Her father had her entire life planned and would no doubt be picking out who he expected her to marry shortly. She'd be lucky if she got any notification more advanced than the hand fasting. And after that she'd be expected to sleep with him, and they'd be married as soon as it was confirmed she was pregnant.

That wouldn't happen soon, she was only ten years old but it would be soon enough, four, five years at the most, probably soon after she bled.

Except she didn't want that. She wanted more than that. She didn't know exactly what she wanted, but she knew it was to be more than the wife of someone in a backwater village. And Cloud… for all that Cloud was eleven years old, he gave her the feeling that it was possible, that anything was possible if you just reached for it.

Tifa closed her eyes, bowing her head. She hadn't reached though. That was another part of the problem. She hadn't reached out at all despite knowing that he probably wanted a friend, despite knowing that Cloud was the best tracker the village had. Why hadn't she reached out? Was she afraid? Was the example of Cloud's Mum, Raisa Strife, who despite being a mountain woman, was one who had remained independent, who had not been forced to remarry…  
Savagely Tifa wiped away the tears that leaked from her eyes.

She was hurt and she was jealous and she was trapped.

"Why did you leave Cloud?" the words were whispered and Tifa looked back up at the stars.

If only she could escape somehow. She smiled wryly to herself. If there was any chance… any chance at all, then she'd take it. She owed herself that much at least.

She owed her memory of Cloud that much.

* * *

Sephiroth looked at the few possessions laid out on the table before him. They were the possessions of a housewife. There was nothing special about them. No notes, no books, nothing that was incriminating yet they were all that was left of the Housekeeper of the Nibelheim Mansion, Raisa Strife. The Turks had brought them hoping that it would help in the investigation.

There was nothing of interest to him. The artefacts that remained were nothing special and Sephiroth felt that the only possession of importance the woman had was her son.

The boy and his wolf would be older now. Old enough to travel over the mountains. Old enough to have helped out in the village and the villagers had confirmed that. They had told him some stories of the boy. The way he knew the mountains and the way his wolf was always with him. Sephiroth could well image it from the one picture he possessed. It was a peaceful photograph. Cloud… It was such a perfect name for the boy. Light and airy yet with his surname, it spoke of strength and without ever seeing the boy in the flesh, Sephiroth knew the lad was strong. Looking into those blue eyes, that almost seemed to glow without mako, Sephiroth felt at peace and he could stare for hours. Not that he could get away with that.

Angeal had caught him at one of the rare times he took the photo out. Sephiroth thought the other man would snarl or think him weak but if anything the knowledge seemed to comfort the other man. It was as if some concern or other was laid to rest. Sephiroth had never asked Angeal what it was but the silver haired man was careful that he wasn't seen again with the picture. As always it rode close to his heart secured in the lining of his jacket. And even with the boy and his mother on the run, it gave him a sense of comfort and serenity every time he thought about them.

Which was more than the situation did. They thought they knew what had happened. Or at least they had a working theory.

Hojo had been suspiciously quiet when presented with the letter which was confirmation enough that _something_ had been in the Mansion. Sephiroth had done his best to verify the claims and had managed to pull up a personal file on the dear Professor. It came as a bit of a surprise to find out that Hojo really had been married. Shinra recorded that much and the woman's name really was Lucrecia nee Crescent. There had been one old picture of her and while it was also clear that she had been an employee of Shinra, her records had been wiped. She was a beautiful woman. The picture showed long brown hair with rich brown eyes and a classic facial structure. While Sephiroth was not overly experienced in matters of the heart, he could only conclude that their relationship had been a meeting of minds. He really didn't want to know what else might have been there.

That much of the note was true but despite what else it said, they did not believe that the creature had eaten the woman but it had definitely taken her, and most likely dictated the letter. They were assuming it was the creature with the five claws and nothing with claws like that could write. There were still anomalies in their theory though. There had been _three_ calibres of bullet and when he'd been tracking them he'd picked up _three_ different sets of boot prints along with the tracks of the wolf. The scratch marks made by the wolf were far different from the scratches of that thing with five claws and he had seen nothing that could have been it on the trail. The three boot prints said that there had to be another person.

Yet no one in Nibelheim or in Rocket Town could remember seeing anyone. Rocket Town remembered Raisa Strife, her son and the wolf and the pilot, Cid Highwind had even reported that he'd taken them to Wutai. After that the woman's trail had been lost and Sephiroth had felt a pain in his heart when he'd heard that. The boy… Cloud was in danger in Wutai. There was no way that either of them could hide their blond hair, so why had they gone there? Did they have a contact? What could they do? Unfortunately, while their spies in Wutai were good, they were not that good and Sephiroth knew that even if the Wutai were to find them, they would most likely kill Raisa and Cloud and it wouldn't even generate a report, so they would never know what happened.

That thought had almost made him return to mount a winter campaign except he knew it would be stupid and Sephiroth prided himself on his intelligence. That's what worried him. Why did he care for that boy? Why did the mere thought of the child calm him down? It made him think clearer. And somehow he knew without being sure how he knew that the blond boy and his wolf were not dead. He'd feel it.

Of course none of it explained how she had gotten away from the thing with claws. Unless it had let her go? And that just lead to more questions. Their working theory was tentative and it had holes but it covered the events and that was about it. It left them with so many questions. Highwind had given them some answers and was now on probation. Hojo would tell them nothing. Both Strife's were uncontactable in Wutai and presumably would keep as far away from them as they could, which left one complete unknown who _might_ have answers yet who was likely to be avoiding them.

Sephiroth sighed to himself, touching his fingertips to his heart as he remembered the picture and the serenity it induced in him. And all of that left one question unanswered, why had Raisa Strife wanted to go to Wutai?

He had a feeling they would find out and he knew that they wouldn't like the answer.

* * *

Cid leaned back in his chair. His cigarette hung from his mouth and his fingers grasped the edges of his glass. The bottle was on the table, about half gone. He felt mellow and that was fine with him. His house was clean, the 'Bronco was polished to an almost painful shine and he still had days left on his probation.

Probation! Ha! No matter what he'd done, Shinra _knew_ he was the best pilot they had. They couldn't fire him. They wouldn't fire him but they sure as hell knew how to make life difficult. But he had the last laugh. He knew where everyone's stash of alcohol was so this enforced probation period was turning more into a drinking holiday. On the whole, it was rather pleasant.

The woman's words though. They had not been pleasant and he could not get them out of his mind. He'd thought about them on the flight back and finally dismissed them. But that night he'd shot bolt upright when he realised what about them was wrong.

They were the words of someone who knew. That was their tone.

They weren't the words of someone who was speculating on something. That woman, she knew something and it had been in her voice the entire time.

Of course, he hadn't told Shinra that when the troopers had come to the door. And he hadn't told that too silent, too observant silver haired freak of a SOLDIER that either though Cid suspected that the man knew something was up. There had been the slightest smile on his face when Cid had admitted to losing a bet to the kid. That much was public record so Highwind wasn't stupid enough to try to deny that. Some of the rest he had denied. Bah… Let Shinra work it out for themselves. He owed them nothing.

Though if what the woman said was true… Would they really go for space? And would they then abandon him? He was their best pilot but Cid was practical. There were always new hotshots coming in up the ranks, always some new-fangled trick or a risk that some idiot would take. He was the best, but he knew what he was doing. Those kids they didn't and they didn't care. They still had that belief they were invincible and soon enough, when the next campaign started, he knew he'd be seeing them dead.

But what if Shinra decided to go with one of them? Where did that leave him?

Oh, he knew where it left him. It left him out in the cold and worse yet… on the ground.

They couldn't. Not only was he their best pilot he was one of their best designers. They wouldn't even have the 'Bronco if it weren't for him. Not to mention those designs for the other ships. He was the reason those designs had gone beyond idea to paper. By the Planet, most of those ideas were his and he'd be darned if he just let Shinra take them away.

Cid snorted. That woman… She already knew how that would go and no matter what she was involved in she'd given him an in to that. Whatever it was, it was something to do with the war. No one went to Wutai without being involved in the war but could one mountain woman give them? How was she going to change the balance of the war?

He drained the last drops of alcohol from his glass, flicking his ciggie away. He didn't know and there was only one way to find out and that was to stay with Shinra. So he'd stay with them, no matter what she had said, but he'd watch and he'd be careful. If Shinra though they could take his planes from him… well they had another thing coming and that woman would find herself with a pilot who could take her anywhere.

* * *

Aerith paused as she placed one hand on the plant. This was so different from Midgar. Life and the Planet were all around her. The gardens were almost bursting with it and beyond the city the wilds sang to her a comforting lullaby that sent her to sleep each night. She thought it might be like Icicle Base but despite straining her memory, all she could remember of that place was a couple of images of white snow and her mother standing happily in front of a house. It didn't matter that she couldn't remember, this was paradise!

The Lifestream hummed below her senses and the best of it was that she didn't have to pretend not to hear. The people here knew she could talk to the Planet and they wanted her to. A small blonde woman had taken her aside right after she'd arrived. She'd been afraid, who wouldn't be, having been kidnapped from her bed in Midgar and dragged half way across the Planet. The woman had tried to explain things though and Aerith really couldn't remember what she had said. It didn't matter. The Planet recognised the woman and said that she was safe and that was enough for the small girl. The blonde woman had also told her that she did not need to cry for Elmyra. Her adoptive mother had been left in Midgar but she had been compensated. She wouldn't go hungry and that soothed Aerith though she'd still cried that day, for everything that was gone but the next day she'd resolved to look upon this as a new adventure.

There was no other way it could be defined. The people here were so different. Firstly there was the woman, blonde, who seemed to be the only one in a country where everyone had black hair. Wutai. And that was another surprise. She's seen the news, the papers were full of it and every single paper said that the Wutai people were savages, would hurt her if they could, were brutal and dangerous and not to be trusted. Yet the Planet trusted them. The Planet cried with them and everything she could feel showed that they were compassionate in their own way. There was a deep undertone of concern but even though she was only twelve years old she knew that was because of the War.

Which was why she was here. The blonde woman had explained to her about SOLDIERS and how they were created using Mako and bits of the Calamity, Jenova. Aerith understood that. Eleven years old or not she knew what that meant. She'd heard the Planet's cries at that and she knew it was bad. But then the woman had continued, trying to explain that she wanted to create something else, something to counter the SOLDIERs and for that she needed Aerith's help. That bit didn't make sense, even with the Planet's explanations but she'd agreed and the woman had very carefully drawn a large vial of blood. She'd been a bit dizzy after that, but a good meal of weird food and a night of rest and she had felt fine the next day.

Her hosts had appeared happier that day as well and Aerith was a bit puzzled as to why… Until she worked out that they had been afraid she'd say no. But the Planet had wanted this so why would she say no? She'd told them that and after some confused looks a man with a pointy beard had laughed and had again thanked her. He'd asked her then to tell him anything the Planet said.

That was one of the weirdest yet nicest things about being here. They knew she could talk to the Planet and they wanted her to. She'd always had to hide it in the past but they'd actually set aside of a bit of time for her each day so that she could roam the gardens and talk to the Planet. And every day she was reminded this was not Midgar.

Midgar… It was dark and noisy and smelly and she missed it. It was full of life, but only people and they were interesting. The people here were interesting but they were different and she missed the routines of the past. The song of the Planet had comforted her but it could not fill the ache inside and after she'd been in this new place for a month the blonde woman, who had introduced herself as Raisa had seen that and had offered her hand with a small smile and lead her through the corridors of the house.

Aerith had been surprised when they'd ended up in a small room with a small man sitting at the front and two children kneeling before him, fidgeting slightly but paying attention. From that day forward she'd been going to school. It was not what she expected. Mornings were given over to classes where they sat and learned and they learned everything! They were focusing on learning language at the moment, since she didn't speak Wutai and that seemed to be going well. The blond boy, Cloud had been able to hold simple conversations with the other girl in the class, Yuffie and they provided her with practice in their language. But they also learned history, etiquette, maths, science, biology, healing, physics, flower arranging, politics and diplomacy. Language they did each day, and the other classes rotated. In the afternoons, they did other classes and Aerith didn't like these ones but she did find out why the other two paid such close attention in science class. The afternoons were more physical classes where they learned how to move silently, how to wield a sword and shuriken, how to fire guns and fight hand to hand, as well as how to create small explosives and smoke bombs, and how to use materia. That class she liked because she could feel the Planet through the little green orbs and her teachers had been amazed at how quickly she picked up those skills, though Cloud wasn't too far behind her there and he was already fast and strong and able to wield a sword that appeared far too large for him. He was also the best with a gun, but he'd shrugged off praise, saying that someone had already taught him so it wasn't his skill. Each day, late in the afternoon, when they were tired, the weapons teachers explained tactics and battle moves to them. Aerith didn't like that part of the day. Killing made her feel sick and the Planet tried to comfort her.

She knew death was merely part of the cycle and not to be feared. You simply returned to the Planet, the Planet that had created you in the first place but the act of forcing something to go back to the Planet… That made her ill. The other two children seemed to recognise that and Cloud comforted as best he could, telling her that if she had to kill, she should leave the final blow to him. He would do it for her.

It was a child's promise and his blue eyes had almost glowed when he said it but she believed him and the Planet somehow hummed and Aerith had cried again while he comforted her. After that things didn't seem so bad. This was a new adventure for her and things were happy. Sure she had to provide some blood every now and then and she could almost feel echoes of herself in the distance, but she also had friends, something she had never had before, and she never had to hide when she was talking with the Planet. She missed Midgar with the press of people and the never ending noise and motion but as the seasons turned and she settled into the new routine the calm serenity of Wutai with its odd overtone of tension was fast becoming home.

* * *

Shears sighed and shook his head. Another fight.

It didn't used to be like this and it shouldn't be like this but he knew exactly when things changed. And he knew exactly who to blame.

That woman!

That blonde woman who'd appeared in Wutai like an apparition and had the gall to go straight to Godo's Winter Palace and from there… And from there he wasn't entirely sure what she had done. Oh he knew exactly _what_ she had done, she had saved the Lady Kasumi and Prince Kichirou with the use of some simple material and then she had made demands on the Lord of Wutai, demands Godo saw fit to grant. So Avalanche went from honoured ally to the doghouse all because of the say of one woman, one woman who wasn't even Wutai!

The most infuriating bit was that they should have been there. They had the same materia, they could have performed the same service but the chance had passed them by. If he was honest with himself, they had been too sure of the war, too sure that Wutai would be against Shinra and would thus support them. Well, Wutai was still against Shinra, but Wutai had just recognised that they were a sovereign nation and Avalanche was what…

If Shears was honest with himself he knew exactly what Avalanche were. Their cause was honourable and noble, there was no doubt about that, but they were just a bunch of riff-raff, cobbled together anarchists who would use any reason to fight against Shinra. Some of them genuinely wanted to save the planet. Elfie did, though she also wanted revenge. Fuhito… Shears shuddered… Fuhito was useful but he didn't care about the Planet, he wanted Shinra's science labs laid out before him. For the rest it was a bit of a mix. They were an amalgamation, brought together and held together by their hatred of Shinra and when something disturbed that… when some new element was added to the mix, they came apart at the seams, separating like oil and water to follow their own paths.

He rubbed his temples. Godo's demands hadn't been that high or that unrealistic. The Lord of Wutai had initially only agreed to let them on Wutai land while they were helpful and while Shears liked to think they were helping with the war, that was mostly Wutai forces and Godo had seemed happy with that. Until that woman came with her materia and what..? It was hard to believe that one woman could change so much.

Shears snorted to himself. Elfie was one woman so he shouldn't be surprised. It was just difficult to think that one unenhanced woman could do as much as the blonde had. In a few short months of winter she had changed Wutai's outlook completely. At first it hadn't been clear what she was doing and then they had caught rumours, in between their grumblings against the altered policies of the Lord of Wutai. Then they had seen the first Warriors practicing and those rumours had coalesced into a brutal reality. Wutai now possessed SOLDIERs. And that secret was being kept on the highest levels. Avalanche only knew because they were still invited to the palace on occasion, otherwise like everyone else, they would not know.

Their relationship with Wutai had already been strained. It had been strained the moment Godo had demanded that they kidnap people from Midgar but they'd done it, though they had had no idea what the Lord of Wutai wanted with a brat. He'd seemed pleased when the girl arrived and she had been shuffled off into another section of the Palace and that was the last Shears had seen or heard from her. But the knowledge that Wutai now had SOLDIERs, that had caused a fight between Godo, Elfie and Fuhito that Shears still thought he could hear ringing in his ears.

The Lord of Wutai had admitted that they now had enhanced troops but had been deathly quiet in his promise that if they let Shinra know then he would find a way to obliterate them. On a tactical level Shears could agree. Winter was almost over and the war would begin again in earnest. Not that it wasn't fought in winter, but the winter campaign was nowhere near as vicious as the spring, summer and even autumn campaigns. And Wutai planned to release their enhanced troops about midway into the Spring Campaign. Shinra would be thrown and if Wutai was lucky, they might be able to take out one of Shinra's vaunted Firsts. That would be a victory of mammoth proportions. Tactically, Elfie and Fuhito could admit that but it would be a victory that Avalanche played no part in.

That's what was grating on them or at least on Elfie. Fuhito was fuming that Lord Godo had simply and quietly refused point blank to tell them how they had obtained the technology to enhance and further, he had refused to tell them the process. He claimed he didn't know. Fuhito thought he was lying but Shears thought that Godo was telling the truth on that. The Lord of Wutai might vaguely know what was involved, he'd have had to provide the materials but he probably knew nothing more than that. But he had also refused to tell them who had given Wutai the knowledge.

It wasn't hard for Avalanche to work out who had though. No matter how well hidden the woman and her child were, they were not invisible and it was hard to hide hair that blonde in a nation of black hair. They'd never managed to get the woman alone and it was only through the gossip of the Palace staff and making inferences from various actions that they had managed to piece together what had happened. Somehow that woman knew the method to make enhanced SOLDIERs and she'd traded that method for sanctuary. That was the only way Shears could describe it.

Her son was educated alongside the Princess Yuffie, along with the girl they had grabbed from Midgar and the woman was assigned to the Lady Kasumi's personal staff but she barely spent any time in the women's wing of the Palace. The woman was invisible to the rest of Wutai and she would be invisible to Shinra but not to Avalanche. Shears wondered how long she could hide from Shinra, just as he wondered who exactly she was. The files they had stolen over time from Shinra didn't exactly list many women working in the science department in positions anything more important than secretary. So how had she learned to enhance humans? Where had she learned to enhance humans? Especially as the one time Shears had gotten a glimpse of her, she looked like some country bumpkin of a woman. Rural… really rural was the impression he had gotten, which was completely at odds with her actions and abilities.

Shinra would be searching for her the instant they found out about Wutai's enhanced troops but Lord Godo seemed determined to keep her safe. A completely understandable policy all things considered, though how safe she would be remained to be seen. It was odd though. They had managed to talk to a few of Wutai's enhanced troops and they never mentioned the woman, they only said the treatments were delivered by someone they had dubbed Mother. Did they not know it was a blonde woman who gave them the enhancements? Had Godo kept that even from his troops? Shears shook his head. It mattered but it was something he didn't have the answers for. Wutai's enhanced SOLDIERs may not know who Mother was but they well knew exactly what _they_ meant for the future of Wutai and they were fanatically loyal both to their country and to the woman who had given them that power.

Elfie had been incised but she had calmed down as the weeks had passed and had tried to find a way to work with the Lord of Wutai. Godo had seemed to appreciate that and the two of them had worked out some missions to be pursued in the spring. Avalanche would not fight much on Wutai soil though. That much had changed. Godo seemed to want to push whatever advantage he gained with having enhanced SOLDIERs and wanted to push more to the mainland. Avalanche had no argument against that. They could not take down Shinra merely by fighting on Wutai so they had had no recourse but to go along with the suggestions from the Lord of Wutai.

While Elfie had taken that news rather calmly Fuhito had been angry. It had taken their combined abilities to calm him down though his accusation towards Elfie, that she was only so calm because she was still stronger than all but the most enhanced of the Wutai SOLDIERs had bitten deep. By the Planet, why couldn't he keep his mouth shut? Did he not see how much she liked him? Shears could not remember ever being so angry at their scientist but he'd let it pass, because it did hold a note of truth.

He'd instead tried to push the conversation around towards things they could do. The list of things had been surprisingly short and most of it had been things suggested by the Lord of Wutai. Somehow they'd patched things up but Shears was not looking forward to Spring. Then everything could so easily come crashing down around them. So much depended on how Shinra reacted. Godo seemed to know that but even he did not know what would happen.

Shears sighed. He needed to spend less time thinking about the past and more about the future… Except the future was clouded and he doubted even that blonde woman knew what she had done. Oh but she would. He would make sure of that!

* * *

Vincent sheltered under a tree as the snow fell. He probably should have found some place to wait the winter out but the woman's letter had driven him to keep going, to keep searching for Lucrecia. Lucrecia… beautiful Lucrecia, forever preserved in his memory as the woman she had been, rather than the woman she became. The sharpshooter had had a long moment of anger when he read the woman's letter. She had _known_ that Lucrecia was alive and she had deliberately not told him until she was out of reach.

He could have slipped into Rocket Town easily enough but even as he'd thought about that, he knew it would be pointless. So Raisa hadn't told him until after they parted ways. But she had told him. That was important, and she had done her best to describe the place where Lucrecia was hiding. The description wasn't much but it was better than nothing. "High in the mountains, in a cave beside a lake that looks like a crater." That might describe quite a few places… It might not even be on this continent but he was content. He'd find it eventually.

Chaos hadn't even objected too much to his gallivanting about all winter but the beast had been quieter since he'd seen that woman and her son. Vincent had tried asking but the creature had been silent… well after it had laughed and garbled something out about the Planet's Butterfly. The creature was interested though but it didn't want to find Lucrecia for the same reasons Vincent did and the former Turk could feel himself unconsciously holding back every day he searched. He wasn't sure he could control Chaos. And he didn't know what resources Lucrecia might have on hand to protect her.

It was like one of those questions that they asked all Turks. The moral questions. The gunman has their weapon to the head of the hostage? What do you do? For a Turk, the answer was simple, so long as the hostage is not the President, you shoot them both. And if it was the President, you shoot yourself. But he wasn't Turk enough to shoot Lucrecia.

That realisation had brought Chaos' attention and the creature had laughed and laughed and laughed. Then it had prodded through his thoughts until it was satisfied that the reaction was real. And then had laughed some more. In some ways Chaos was so shockingly simple, in others the creature confused him still. He wasn't like the others, Gilian Beast, Death Gigas and Hellmasker. They were simple expressions of instinct. Chaos was at once both more elemental and more complex and Vincent knew that the creature could hear the Planet when it so desired. Except for the moment the Planet had been quiet.

Chaos seemed to accept that as normal but Vincent was used to the whisper and it was odd. All through the time he slept the Planet had whispered to Chaos and he'd grown accustomed to the murmur under his hearing. It felt wrong with it gone. :Right at the moment, the Planet is not focused on me.: That was all the explanation Chaos had seen fit to provide and despite being absorbed with the problem at hand, Vincent had wondered what the Planet was fixated on.

The Creature had been feeling more genial at the time and had given him an answer. :The Butterfly.: The answer of course made no sense but it was all the answer Chaos would give and eventually Vincent had dropped the matter. It had no bearing on his problem.

Assuming he could find Lucrecia and the former Turk was confident that it was only a matter of time, how did he control Chaos when he got there? The creature wanted the woman dead and wanted that almost more than he wanted anything else. Usually he'd be confident of his ability to control Chaos but not if Lucrecia was present, not unless they had an agreement but on this Chaos refused to bargain. He wanted blood and that was all he would settle for.

That left Vincent searching for an uncertain future, one he wasn't sure he could carry through but one he could not turn away from. He had to find her. He was driven to do that but once he found her… what then? Assuming he could control Chaos, where did that leave him with Lucrecia? Why was she hiding? Was she injured? What had happened?

Raisa's letter only explained a bit but it was not enough. Before he could move forward he had to know those answers but it remained to be seen if Chaos would let him find the answers. Lucrecia would talk to him, Vincent was sure of that. He just wasn't sure he wanted to hear her answers. But hearing those answers was the only way to gain peace so he was trapped. The future was uncertain and until it was resolved, he could not move forward.

Vincent closed red eyes as he settled down to sleep. Outside the canopy of the tree, snow continued to fall but it was the late winter snow and would melt soon enough. He'd keep searching then because if necessary he'd search every valley and mountain until he found that cave… and then once he found Lucrecia… then could the future be decided.

* * *

Third Class SOLDIER Zack Fair blinked groggily. If he got back to Shinra… _When_ he got back to Shinra he was so going to find whoever had written that manual on hostage situations and hurt them. Keep calm and negotiate?

Oh yeah! Right!

Like that was happening.

The people who'd captured him were in no mood to negotiate. They were in no mood for anything except causing him pain. Fuhito… Zack recognised at least one of his captors. Fuhito was probably the most sadistic of the lot. The demented AVALANCHE Scientist caused pain but he was so calm when he visited and every time he came there was a small smile on his face and a dull glint in his eyes.

Zack hated that expression. And the bastard even had the gall to explain what he was trying to do. It was the same old information that anyone with half a brain would have worked out but Zack forced himself to listen, just in case the man said something he shouldn't, just in case some of the information he learned here might be useful to Shinra.

AVALANCHE didn't have enhanced SOLDIERS. They had Elfie but she was one woman, and despite the fact she could face Sephiroth, Zack knew with absolute certainty she couldn't face Sephiroth, Angeal and Genesis at the same time. AVALANCHE like Wutai were fighting a rear-guard action they couldn't hope to win. But they continued to fight and they had captured him, he reflected ruefully.

That's what Fuhito was trying to do. At least what he said he was trying to do. He was trying to learn the secrets to create SOLDIERS. It didn't matter how much Zack screamed, it didn't matter what they did, the Third Class SOLDIER was almost certain they wouldn't be able to find the answer from him because enhancements is not truly what they wanted. What they really wanted was a way of copying Sephiroth and no amount of experimentation on him would help them with that. All he could do was scream. And he had. He had screamed and screamed and screamed until his throat was raw, until the Mako in his system just could not keep up and he'd been left gasping and heaving in pain as Fuhito continued to work.

The bastard had sniggered at him then. Like he did every time and Zack had been forced to watch with wide eyes as the needle came at him. It glowed and he was so used to the burn of Mako now that he barely twitched. With everything else that the megalomaniac had done if he twitched other things would hurt.

He didn't know how much Mako had been introduced to his system. It was hard to keep track of it and there were days when his vision was blurry and he heard things that were just not there; the sound of children, laughing as they ran on wooden floors, the soft hum of voices chatting idly in the late winter sun and the occasional shouted command of a sergeant to his troops was accompanied by the crisp sound of heels moving in unison to salute. Those were thing that were not there, but there were days when Zack swore he heard them and he embraced those sounds, no matter where they were coming from. Anything was better than listening to his own screaming or laboured breathing.

And anything was better to keep his attention in the long moments between the times when Fuhito was there. They stretched for eternity, hours, days, Zack didn't know. There was no light here except when the AVALANCHE Scientist was there. All he could do was wait, testing the bonds that held him and plan for what he would do once he was free.

Because there was one thing Zack Fair knew with absolute certainty; he was _not_ going to die here.

* * *

 


End file.
